


Stress (Connect the Dots)

by RaeMin



Series: Connect the Dots [1]
Category: EXO (Band), Monsta X (Band)
Genre: A+ caregivers, I take requests, Little Space, M/M, Others not, Really this is just for fun and meant to be cute, Some relationships platonic, always aftercare, because it helps me live, but there will also be some angst, caregiver changkyun, caregiver hoseok, caregiver hyunwoo, little jooheon, little kihyun, little minhyuk, neutral hyungwon, possibility of smut but not while characters are in little space, reluctance to be little, the first couple parts are super angsty you have been warned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-02-26 00:47:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 17
Words: 46,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13224693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaeMin/pseuds/RaeMin
Summary: Kihyun is reluctant to go into little space.(Along with other related drabbles! ~ Basically just a bunch of Monsta X, little space, angst, and fluff!)





	1. Stress

**Author's Note:**

> Please read! Little bit of background so no one gets confused ~~ In this universe, everything is the same except for it is commonplace to either be a little, caregiver, or neutral. I have included in the tags who is what. This chapter is very much related to the angst mentioned in the tags, and has a brief mention of non-consensual activity. It's not very detailed, but please take caution if you need to. 
> 
> I also take requests! So if there is a scenario you would like to see, leave a comment! (I love writing fluff too so literally ask for anything my friends)

Kihyun was beyond stressed. He had reached the point of crying about three hours ago and had somehow managed to hold back, but was now quickly nearing the ‘point-of-no-return’ forced drop-off into little space.

They had been practicing for their next comeback all day for _weeks_ without a day off, and whatever free time they had had, Kihyun had to be working on his vocals with his instructor. So while his other members got to relax for a few hours, and Jooheon and Minhyuk could go into little space to deal with their stress, Kihyun had to tough it out and work through it all on his own.

 He knew the others were worried about him. When he came back to the dorm hours after the others were already done with their day, they would all pounce on him to see if there was anything he needed, any way they could help, but he would always brush them off, shower, and pass out in his bed. 

Kihyun was _exhausted._ All he wanted was to drop and let his caregivers take care of him, but he could never get the time. In the mornings when he had to leave an hour before the others, he would stare longingly at Jooheon and Minhyuk playing together, and his feet would always be tempted to turn him right around to start playing, or ask to be cuddled.

But Kihyun never did. Hyunwoo and Hoseok had been giving Kihyun’s avoidance of little space less attention and thought than they would have if it were Jooheon or Minhyuk, as Kihyun rarely allowed himself to go in to little space as it was. He had always been reluctant, even scared to let himself go around the others because he was always terrified of how he would act. His old caregiver, back before Monsta X days, had always told him he was whiny and bratty while in little space, and he was often punished for his bad behavior.

But what Kihyun’s little side had never learned to understand was that laughing a little too loudly at cartoons, humming to his stuffed animals, or accidentally dropping some food on the floor while being told to eat with adult chopsticks while in the mindset of a three year old, was nothing he should ever have been punished for in the first place. 

So, while Kihyun may have desperately _wanted_ to drop into little space, he wouldn't allow himself to. Even though he was exhausted and his body physically _hurt_ due to all of the strain he was putting on himself, he would not allow Hyunwoo’s worried gaze, or Hoseok’s questioning, or Changkyun’s sly placement of a stuffed animal on his bed, to let him slip. 

Kihyun was fighting it, but he was losing. 

The only other instance in Monsta X’s time of being together that Kihyun had let himself enter little space had been shortly after their debut. After Jooheon and Minhyuk had become comfortable enough around the caregivers to let their little sides come out, it had been expected that Kihyun would follow soon after. But after months of Kihyun making up excuses to dodge the others while they were in little space, as other littles were a _huge_ trigger to make someone slip, Hoseok had eventually confronted him.

Kihyun had awkwardly, and as vaguely as possible, explained to Hoseok that it wasn't anything he or any of the others were doing wrong, it was just _him._ He explained that he’d had a caregiver before Monsta X, one that had been abusive, so he wasn’t sure how his little side would react to not only one, but _three_ new caregivers. He just didn't want to embarrass himself or scare any of his bandmates.

Hoseok had looked absolutely heartbroken at Kihyun’s revelation. He had tried his hardest to assure Kihyun that no one would judge him, but it fell on deaf ears. Kihyun was dead set on never slipping again.

The first, and only time Kihyun ever entered little space in front of any of the others was when Minhyuk and he had been left alone while the others went grocery shopping. Minhyuk had been in his adult headspace when the others left, and Kihyun had been sat in the living room with him watching TV when it happened. 

Minhyuk had been in the kitchen getting some snacks, when a loud crash, followed by even louder crying, had startled Kihyun out of his engrossment in the film. He immediately shot to his feet and darted into the kitchen, coming face to face with a sobbing Minhyuk who was currently sat on the floor, hand held protectively towards his chest, surrounded by broken glass and popcorn.

“Oh shit,” Kihyun uttered gracefully.

Eyes darting around the room, Kihyun quickly tried to figure out what had happened. Minhyuk had probably been filling the bowl with popcorn and somehow it fell off the counter? And that had startled him into little space? How much glass was broken? Was Minhyuk bleeding? Shit, was he hurt - 

“Kiyunnie!” Minhyuk whined desperately, snapping Kihyun out of his thoughts. He froze at the nickname, or attempted toddler pronunciation of his name rather, beginning to feel the familiar tug at the back of his mind. 

Shaking his head, Kihyun pushed everything else aside to focus on the task at hand. He bent down to pick up the remains of the bowl (it had luckily only broken into large fragments instead of shattering, so it was easily cleaned up). He then crouched down in front of Minhyuk, still completely unsure of how to handle him. 

“Can I see your hand? Did you hurt yourself?” he asked Minhyuk, who, after being distracted by watching Kihyun clean up the mess was made aware of his injury again, erupting into a fresh wave of tears. 

Kihyun went to reach for Minhyuk’s hand, but he kept it held close to him, crying out, “No! Wan’ Appa!” But Hyunwoo wasn't there right now and Kihyun had no idea what the _fuck_ to do because he was literally ten seconds away from bursting into tears and crying for Appa too, but he reeled himself in.

“If you let me see, you can have a piece of chocolate?” Kihyun tried hesitantly, and Minhyuk nodded his head after a few moments, holding out his hand.

Kihyun took it and inspected Minhyuk’s small wound. It had bled a little but had stopped long ago, most likely being caused by Minhyuk’s sudden drop to the floor rather than from a shard of glass. Kihyun sighed in relief. 

He went to let go of Minhyuk’s hand, but the little protested. “Appa always kiss,” he said, gesturing to his hand, and Kihyun’s eyes watered because of _course_ their caregivers were that sweet. Kihyun gave Minhyuk’s injury a quick peck, then pulled the two of them to their feet. After Kihyun had given Minhyuk his promised piece of chocolate, Minhyuk took the lead, pulling Kihyun back to the couch and bouncing up and down on the cushions, looking at Kihyun expectantly.

“Uh, what do you want to watch?” he asked.

“Toons!” Minhyuk said, then launched into a detailed explanation of his favorite characters while Kihyun fumbled with the remote, finally finding a kids channel.

After watching Minhyuk settle into watching the cartoons, and trying his hardest himself to not pay attention to them, he tried to sneak away.

Minhyuk, however, was not having it. “Kiyunnie stay, please?” he asked, moving to wrap his arms around Kihyun. And Kihyun absolutely did not have the heart to tell Minhyuk no, so he sat with him, eyes downcast, trying to direct his thoughts anywhere but at what was playing on the TV.

But eventually he got weak. A particularly bright flash of color caught his attention, and he was done for. He quickly became just as engrossed in the show as Minhyuk was, both of them not noticing the front door opening.

“Guys, we’re home,” Hoseok shouted from the entryway.

“Daddy!” Minhyuk shouted, untangling himself from Kihyun and running towards the door.

Kihyun froze. His little self couldn’t remember if he was allowed to watch TV, or sit on the couch, or if he was in trouble for something, or - 

“Kihyun?” Hoseok asked from the door of the living room, but Minhyuk pulled on his hand and said,

“No daddy, Kiyunnie little like me!” Minhyuk tried to explain, and Kihyun was scared. 

Hyunwoo walked in, nudging his way past Hoseok, “What’s going on?” he asked, eyeing a scared Kihyun on the couch worriedly.

“I think Kihyun’s in little-“

“No I’m not!” Kihyun snapped suddenly, head dizzy. Just pull a little harder, almost out, almost out - 

A hand placed on Kihyun’s knee was all it took to fully snap into his adult headspace. He jerked away from the hand; Hyunwoo’s hand, “No I’m not, I’m fine, I…” he trailed off, suddenly darting away from everyone and into his bedroom.

And that was the only time any of the members had ever witnessed Kihyun in little space. After the event, Kihyun had given Hoseok the okay to help him tell Hyunwoo why he was uncomfortable with being little, and had eventually told the others as well. Since then, they had all been nothing but understanding of his reluctance to enter little space, but would always reassure him that they would be there for him if he ever needed them to.

And now, after weeks of going non-stop, having reached his breaking point days ago, Kihyun was nearly ready to take them up on it, because he just couldn’t _deal_ with any of it anymore.

Those with a little side are supposed to enter their headspace once a week, at minimum. It’s the best way for them to deal with stress. For caregivers, taking care of their littles, if they have them, is the best way for _them_ to deal with their stress. It’s all in biology, and Kihyun had been fighting against his for _years,_ and he was just so _tired._

When he entered the dorm that night, several hours after the others had all been dismissed from dance practice and had discovered that the lights had all been turned off, meaning that the others were all in bed, Kihyun was at a loss for what to do. When he had said goodbye to the others after dance practice, he had held on to Hyunwoo’s sleeve for a moment too long after he had hugged him goodbye. He hadn't said a word to discourage Hyunwoo’s worried stare. 

And now all he wanted was for Hyunwoo, or anyone for that matter, to hold him and suddenly he couldn’t hold back any longer.

The dam broke, and Kihyun slid to the floor, suddenly too little to stand on his own. His little self suddenly became aware that he was by himself, in a dark hallway, and all alone when there could be _monsters_ out there and he sniffled, which quickly morphed into full-on sobbing.

It only took a few moments for one of the bedroom lights to flick on, a set of feet hurriedly rushing down the hallway and towards Kihyun. 

Hyunwoo rounded the corner, eyes wide and alert, and when they landed on Kihyun curled into himself on the floor, his heart twisted painfully.

Hyunwoo crouched in front of the still-crying little, who currently had his knees pulled up to his chest and head buried. 

“Oh, baby,” Hyunwoo mumbled softly, wanting nothing more than to pull the little close and comfort him but unsure of what he would be comfortable with, opting to let Kihyun make the first move. 

Hyunwoo didn't have to wait long. Kihyun’s head shot up upon hearing Hyunwoo’s voice, and a fresh wave of tears fell. 

Their eyes met, and Kihyun only hesitated a moment before choking out a broken, “Appa,” and launching himself into the older’s arms.

Kihyun, with his head buried in Hyunwoo’s neck, arms wrapped around him tightly, didn't hear the other members (minus Jooheon and Minhyuk, who had both been carted away by Hyungwon when he had noticed Kihyun’s fragile emotional state) rushing out into the hallway. Someone reached to rub Kihyun’s back soothingly, causing Kihyun to let out a whine and flinch away, burrowing further into Hyunwoo.

Behind Kihyun, Hoseok quickly jerked his hand away upon registering Kihyun’s negative reaction. His eyes widened in confusion and hurt, locking with Hyunwoo, who looked just as lost as Hoseok felt.

They waited together in the hallway for Kihyun to calm down. When he finally went slack against Hyunwoo’s chest, having finally cried out some of his adult stress, Hyunwoo snapped into action.

“Okay baby, I’m going to pick you up and carry you to bed now, okay?” Hyunwoo told Kihyun as he lifted him up gently and carried him to his bedroom, Hoseok and Changkyun trailing close behind. Kihyun’s eyes had fluttered shut from where his head rested on Hyunwoo’s shoulder, and Hoseok was having an incredibly hard time not cooing at how adorable the younger was.

Things were going smoothly until Hyunwoo laid Kihyun down on the bed, beginning the same routine as he did with his other two littles. He grabbed some of Kihyun’s most comfortable pajamas, as Kihyun didn't own any little space clothing. Hyunwoo’s heart twisted, deciding that that would definitely need to change.

It wasn't until Hyunwoo reached to unbutton Kihyun’s jeans and began to gently tug them down that Kihyun let out a small strangled sound, hand reaching down to weakly push Hyunwoo’s away, other hand going up to cover his face as he began to sob again, that Hyunwoo was really cued in on how bad Kihyun’s abuse by his former caregiver must have been.

A caregiver taking advantage of a little in their headspace was not only illegal, but went against every fibre and biological instinct of a caregiver. A little’s headspace is very commonly too young to give consent, and Hyunwoo had Kihyun pegged as around two or three, at the oldest. The thought made him sick. 

Kihyun hadn't told them about that. It absolutely could not be true. There’s no way anyone could ever do something like that to Kihyun, absolutely no way.

“Oh god, no.” Hoseok choked out from behind him. Next to him, Changkyun had paled. 

Hyunwoo immediately jerked his hands away from Kihyun’s hips, opting to sit down next to him on the bed. “Oh, baby, no, no one is going to hurt you sweetheart, never again,”

Kihyun took a while, but eventually calmed down again, reassured at the fact that not one of the three men in the room had made any move to touch him. But then he was craving physical contact again, and had no idea how to voice it in a way that wouldn't get him in trouble, so he opened his eyes and turned his head towards Hoseok and simply reached his hand out to him with a small whine. Hoseok was quick to oblige, and pulled Kihyun into his arms. While Hoseok held him and whispered reassurances into his hair, Hyunwoo was finally able to get him changed into his pajamas. It was a process, Hyuwoo always stopping when Kihyun let out the smallest sound of discomfort, always waiting patiently for him to calm down. 

When Kihyun was finally in pajamas, Hoseok laid down on the bed and Kihyun curled up on his chest, hand fisting his shirt. Hyunwoo and Changkyun kissed Kihyun’s forehead, told him goodnight, and headed off to their own rooms. 

They each knew they had a long road ahead of them. Now that they were aware of what Kihyun’s past abuse had truly entailed, they needed to act accordingly. Kihyun would take time to open up to them, to trust them. They all knew that if Kihyun woke up in his adult headspace, he would be beyond embarrassed, and would most likely shut them all out. None of the three caregivers had any idea of how to act in this situation, there was no guidebook for this sort of thing. 

They all knew that it would be difficult, but each and every one of the members loved Kihyun, and would be willing to do whatever it takes to make him feel safe.

 


	2. Stress (part 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Here is part two to 'Stress'! A few of you requested a part two, and I was happy to oblige. If anyone has any other requests, please comment them! I am willing to write about any of the characters, not just Kihyun. :) Also, this chapter is quite angsty as well, you have been warned! The upcoming parts should be a bit lighter, focusing more on the fluffy stuff promised in the tags.

When Kihyun awoke the next morning, he felt the most rested he had in months.

It wasn't until he became aware of the arm wrapped protectively around him that his previous feeling of restfulness fled, instead being replaced by panic. He had slipped last night, and now his three caregivers knew just how  _fucked up_ he was, and now there was no way they'd _ever_ want him, and -

"Kihyun?" Hoseok slurred sleepily, and Kihyun was torn. He was still somewhat in his younger headspace, but his adult mind was slowly becoming too panicked to deal with the situation. He felt the urge to burst into tears and fall back onto Hoseok's chest simultaneously with wanting to run back to his own bedroom and hide for the rest of his life. 

This internal conflict resulted in Kihyun simply being frozen in place on the bed, Hoseok moving to sit next to him.

"I'm sorry," Kihyun said, now fully in his adult headspace. "I'm s-so sorry, It'll never happen again, I'm so sorry you had to see that-"

"Kihyun," Hoseok interrupted, "You have absolutely nothing that you need to be apologizing for." Hoseok attempted to soothe Kihyun, whom he could tell was quickly nearing tears. 

"B-but I," Kihyun stuttered, the tears finally making their appearance, "I- you were never supposed to know that, none of you were, I never wanted any of you to have to deal with that, to have to deal with  _me_." 

"What on earth are you talking about, baby? Our job is to take care of you, that's all any of us want, I just wish you would have come to us sooner so you wouldn't have been struggling alone all this time." Hoseok said, blinking back his tears. Now was not the time, he needed to be strong for Kihyun right now.

"Y-you shouldn't have to take care of me, I-I'm not a good little, and you've all already got your hands full with Jooheon and Minhyuk, I don't need to be little anyways." Kihyun stated.

"But baby, you do." Hoseok began, "And that is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. You're hurting yourself by never letting go of any stress, you've been working harder than any of us lately and we all know that it's been taking a toll on you. All Changkyun and Hyunwoo and I want is for you to let us take care of you. I know it can't be easy, and I can't imagine what you went through in the past," Kihyun shifted uncomfortably, "but we are all here for you. Please, Kihyun, let us help."

Kihyun's eyes remained in his lap, and the two sat in silence for some time. Then Hoseok felt a splotch of wetness hit his arm, and his eyes shot up to Kihyun's face, who was now sniffling.

"B-but..." Kihyun trailed off, and Hoseok felt the shift in his behavior immediately. He was in little space. "I-I'm bad." 

Hoseok's heart clenched. "Baby, you're not bad." he said, moving to pull Kihyun into his lap. "You're my best boy," he muttered into the younger's hair, causing him to blush. The momentary calm was short-lived, however.

"But Sir always punish me. Says I'm bad and won't love me 'til I'm good."

And suddenly Hoseok couldn't hold back his tears any longer. Who the actual  _fuck_ was this  _monster?_ "Oh baby, no." He said, and Kihyun was twisting around in his arms to face him. 

"Daddy, why cry?" Kihyun asked, beginning to panic. And Hoseok would have cried tears of joy at Kihyun finally calling him his daddy if it weren't such a terrible situation.

"Woah, what?" A voice from the doorway said, and Hoseok looked up through teary eyes to see both Changkyun and Hyunwoo standing there. "Are you okay? What's going on?" 

Kihyun felt like he was a million planets away. He was scared. He had made his daddy  _cry,_ he couldn't imagine what would have happened if he ever made _Sir_ cry, so what were Hyunwoo and Changkyun going to do to him??

"I'm sorry," Kihyun sobbed, and suddenly everything was too much, too new, and he didn't even know the rules or punishments for them that the three caregivers had yet so he had no idea if he was breaking one, and it all just kept piling up and up.

Hoseok's hold around Kihyun tightened while he briefly filled in Changkyun and Hyunwoo, who both looked equally livid. This was the wrong move however, as when Kihyun lifted his head from Hoseok's shoulder where he had attempted to hide himself to chance a glance at the other two caregivers, he had assumed that anger was directed at  _him,_ and had proceeded to cry harder, burying his head in Hoseok's neck again and clinging to him like a baby koala. The whole time he kept sobbing apologies into Hoseok's neck.

"Oh sweetheart, no one is mad at you," Changkyun reassured, rubbing his back soothingly. "We're all upset that someone hurt you like that, no one is mad at you, there's no reason to cry, baby. We just can't understand how someone could hurt someone like you."

Kihyun twisted around once again in Hoseok's lap to face the other two, eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "Hurt because I broke rules," Kihyun uttered, hands twisting in his lap again. 

"What rules, sweetheart?" Hyunwoo asked. And then quickly wished he hadn't.

"No noise. No talking, can only when Sir says so. No baby talk. Have-," Kihyun's voice broke, "Have to stay still and not fight when, when-" Kihyun broke off, crying again. He made a few noises as if trying to remember something, then burst into more tears, "A-and no crying! No crying! I f-forgot, I'm sorry," he finished, vehemently wiping at his eyes and trying to control his shaking. 

"Oh, Jesus." Hyunwoo said, sinking down on the bed, as his legs were shaking too much to stand.

"Baby, I need you to listen to me." Hoseok said, turning to face Kihyun, who snapped his head up, eager to prove himself. Hoseok felt sick. "Right now, with us, there are no rules. No punishment. And no one is ever, ever going to touch you like that again, do you understand?" Hoseok said, keeping his eyes locked with the younger.

Kihyun still looked confused, but he nodded his head in agreement. No rules couldn't be so bad, right? He could watch cartoons with Minhyuk, play with stuffed animals with Jooheon, and maybe even sit on the couch! 

Kihyun's stomach rumbling loudly interrupted the moment, making Changkyun crack a small smile, despite everything. "Sounds like someone is hungry! Want to go get some breakfast, baby?" he asked Kihyun, who smiled and nodded his head. 

Kihyun followed Changkyun into the kitchen, while Hoseok and Hyunwoo stayed behind in the bedroom.

"What the  _fuck,"_ Hoseok said, wiping at his eyes once again. 

"I know." Hyunwoo said, moving to wrap an arm around the younger.

"How could someone treat him like that? Do that to him? Hyung, he wasn't even  _talking_ like a little! I thought he was three, four at the oldest last night but he was talking normally," and then in hit Hyunwoo.

"His rule. No baby talk." 

They both felt sick. When littles regress,  _everything_ about them regresses. Speech, motor skills, all of it. And this man, this  _monster_ had punished Kihyun if he talked or behaved like the age he was? 

"We have to fix this. We have to, Hyung." Hoseok said.

"We will." Hyunwoo added in agreement.

~~~

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, a little Minhyuk and a little Kihyun were meeting for the first time. 

As Changkyun led Kihyun into the kitchen, Kihyun had followed like a lost puppy. Kihyun had no idea what Changkyun was making, as all he ever got to eat was mainly scraps, or if he was lucky, some bread. This was due to him being a messy eater, and his old caregiver hating to clean up after him. He watched Changkyun pour some sort of doughy mix into circles on a baking sheet, eyes widening in awe as they slowly turned brown, and Changkyun flipped them.

"What those?" Kihyun asked as Changkyun put them onto a plate and led Kihyun to the table. 

"These are pancakes, silly. Haven't you ever had those before?" 

"No, only bwead," he said, then shook his head. "Sorry, bread."

Changkyun took a breath to steady himself. He silently vowed to kill that bastard. "Baby, you can talk whatever way you like with us. No rules, remember?" 

It was at that moment that Minhyuk came barreling into the kitchen, an exhausted looking Hyungwon trailing behind. 

"Pancakes!" he screeched, jumping into the chair across from where Changkyun and Kihyun were standing, bouncing up and down excitedly. When his eyes landed on Kihyun standing across from him, his eyes widened comically and he gasped.

"Ki!" he shouted, which prompted Kihyun to cast his eyes down and hide behind Changkyun. 

"Baby," Changkyun warned Minhyuk, "Kihyunnie is a little shy right now, okay? Now, why don't we all sit down and eat." Changkyun compromised, which quickly appeased Minhyuk.

Kihyun sat at the table staring down at the pancake longingly. He waited to see how Minhyuk would eat his (which the kid did by completely foregoing the fork Changkyun had placed out for him, opting to pick up the pancake with his hand. This was also why he never got syrup with his pancakes.)

Kihyun hesitantly picked up his pancake, glancing at Changkyun who smiled and nodded. Kihyun lifted the pancake to his mouth and took a bite. It was absolutely  _amazing_ , but Kihyun remembered what he had been taught, and was sure to take small bites and not be messy. 

Changkyun picked up on how much Kihyun was holding back, and sighed. They certainly had a long road ahead of them.

~~~

After breakfast, Minhyuk had attempted to drag Kihyun away to the living room to play, but Kihyun was sure to glance at Changkyun to make sure it was okay. The two wandered into the living room, and Minhyuk pulled out a box of toys. Kihyun's eyes went directly to the fluffy stuffed dog at the bottom of the box, long forgotten by both Minhyuk and Jooheon. He reached for it and stroked its fur, before quickly tugging it towards his chest and deciding it was his. It had been  _so long_ since Kihyun had gotten to hold a stuffed animal. 

"That's Bark!" Minhyuk smiled, reaching to take the stuffed toy from Kihyun, who didn't resist but felt tears prickle at his eyes upon losing the toy. 

"He'll even bark if you squeeze him! See?" Minhyuk said, squeezing the toy which let out its promised 'bark'. 

"Kiyunnie?" Minhyuk asked, noticing Kihyun's tears. "Oh no don't cry! I was just showing he can bark, you can have him back!" Minhyuk said, pushing the stuffed animal back into Kihyun's arms, who held it so tightly that it let out another 'bark'.

Shortly after, Jooheon entered the room as well, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. He plopped down on the floor next to Minhyuk, grabbing a toy car to play with. 

In the doorway, Changkyun, Hoseok, Hyunwoo, and Hyungwon stood watching the three at play, each with a smile on their lips. Today had been a big day, they were finally beginning to make progress with little Kihyun. They knew they had a long ways to go, but it would be worth it to see Kihyun finally happy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to comment any requests for a particular scenario you would like to see!


	3. Stress (part 3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! In this chapter, as per request, Kihyun's former caregiver makes an appearance. There are various mentions of nonconsensual activity, so please be careful if you need to be. 
> 
> Also, friendly reminder that I take requests~! I will be attaching some ideas for future parts of this work in the end notes, so please feel free to let me know in the comments which you would like to see, or leave an idea of your own!

Kihyun was, to put it lightly, extremely confused when he woke up the next morning.

Not only was he still feeling well-rested, but Minhyuk was wrapped around him, cuddled into his side. Kihyun wasn't sure if Minhyuk was still little or not, so he made sure to take extreme caution while untangling himself from him. Kihyun successfully made his way out of the room without waking Minhyuk, peeking his head out the door to make sure the coast was clear before darting out of the room and into the bathroom.

Kihyun was almost certain no one else was awake yet, and wouldn't be for an hour more at least, but he still cut his shower time in half and was out of the dorm before Hyunwoo's alarm could even _think_ about going off. A quick glance at his phone revealed that it was 6:32am. The others didn't have to be at dance practice until 8am, so Kihyun had some time to think.

He entered the door of their practice room, sitting down on one of the benches along the wall. A glance at himself in the mirror revealed that he looked the most rested he had in months. 

Kihyun ran his hands through his hair, slightly frustrated at how hard this all still was for him. So what, he had slipped into little space, but it had gone fine - in fact, it had been  _better_ than fine,  _perfect_ even, but still Kihyun couldn't help but feeling embarrassed. His caregivers had been amazing, frequently talking Kihyun down from emotional cliffs without getting even the  _slightest_ bit annoyed, and Kihyun honestly wasn't sure how they had managed it. Thinking back, he could remember how hurt they had all looked, and Kihyun felt guilty for making the others share this burden with him.

The other two littles had handled everything well, too. Minhyuk had practically clung to Kihyun the entire time, happily accepting his new role as the over-protective big brother. He had played with Kihyun nearly all day, and had taught him how to play a few games and turn on cartoons on the TV. Jooheon, however, had been more reserved; opting to play quietly and stare whenever one of the caregivers interacted with Kihyun. Everyone had thought it was slightly odd, as Jooheon was usually  _extremely_ outgoing in (and out) of his headspace, but they had attributed it to the fact that some littles handle a newcomer differently than others do, and had decided that Jooheon just needed time to adjust to having Kihyun around. 

Kihyun wasn't even sure why he had ran from the dorm in the first place. Sure, he would definitely be writing it off as having had to leave early for a vocal lesson, but his position on the bench in the practice room clearly showed that was a lie. Truth be told, he was scared to face the others. He kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it hadn't. He had expected one of the three caregivers to talk him out of his headspace to inform him that he was just too messed up for them to take care of, but they hadn't. They had been there for him as much as they could, and that's what scared Kihyun the most. It couldn't possibly be this good, could it? There had to be  _some_ catch, there's no way that Kihyun got this lucky.

Kihyun is used to being both emotionally and physically abused while in his little headspace, so having not just one person but _three_  tell him that that would  _never_ be happening again, and treat him with nothing but love and kindness, had been hard to process. The entire time he was little, which was just under two days, no one had yelled at him, hit him, or punished him in any way. And to Kihyun, that was  _weird._ His old caregiver used to tell Kihyun that he owed him his obedience and compliance because of how well he took care of him, and how much he did for him. Looking back on it now, Kihyun knew how awful all of it had been, but it was still hard for him to believe that Hyunwoo, Hoseok, and Changkyun wanted nothing more than to just take care of him, and that they wanted absolutely nothing in return. 

"There you are!" Minhyuk shouted from the doorway, rushing to Kihyun and throwing his arms around him. "We were worried sick! I woke up and you weren't there, weren't anywhere!"

Kihyun glanced at the clock on the opposite wall, eyes widening at how much time had passed since he had been sitting there. "Uh, sorry. I had a vocal lesson." he said lamely.

Minhyuk pulled away, looking like he was about to call bullshit, but was cutoff by the others entering the practice room. "Called it," Hyungwon said, knocking Hyunwoo on the shoulder. "Told you he would be here, hyung." 

Hyunwoo opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by the dance instructor entering the room. Kihyun took that as an opportunity to jump up and begin stretching, dodging Hyunwoo for the moment. But what he failed to remember was that Hoseok and Hyunwoo are practically the same person, so while his movements led him away from Hyunwoo, they also dumped him straight into the path of Hoseok, who gently took his hand and led him out of the practice room and into the hallway outside.

"Hyung, we should really be getting ready for practice," Kihyun said, attempting to free his hand from Hoseok's grasp.

"You're more important," Hoseok said, and the look on his face told Kihyun that there was no room for argument. 

"Ok, so, what?" Kihyun said, crossing his arms in front of his chest and trying as hard as he could to come across as nonchalant.

"Kihyun," Hoseok said gently, and it made Kihyun slightly uncomfortable. But not in a bad way. The caring look in his eyes had Kihyun pushing down butterflies he'd been fighting against since trainee days. "Please don't push us away." 

"I know, I'm trying not to, it's just really, really..." he trailed off, releasing a shaky breath, "hard."

"I know, and I can't imagine, but we're here for you. All of us. If you want to make going into your headspace a regular thing, like Minhyuk and Jooheon do, we'll take care of you." 

Kihyun was fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. All this talk about his headspace, especially when he had just come out of it this morning, was making him antsy. "Hyung, I can't talk about this now." he said, hoping Hoseok would get what he was trying to say, without him having to come out and say it directly.

And of course Hoseok understood. "Of course. Let's go practice." 

He gave Kihyun a reassuring smile before grabbing his hand once again, leading him back into the practice room. 

~~~

By the time practice had finally drawn to a close, everyone was exhausted. They were lucky to have had a rare free day the day before, but free days somehow always made going back to practice just a little bit harder.

Their dance instructor packed up his bag, turning to the group once more before he left for the day. "Great job today guys. Work on that by yourselves for the next few days, and I'll be back to check on your progress. Oh, and Kihyun, I was asked to let you know that you'll have a new vocal instructor starting tomorrow morning, Mr. Kim's wife had her baby." 

Kihyun smiled at that. His vocal instructor, Mr. Kim, had been expecting his first child, and he was happy for him. The idea of a new vocal instructor had him feeling slightly uneasy, however. Kihyun didn't like change.

The group headed back to their dorm, Jooheon and Changkyun racing to beat each other to the shower. Kihyun headed to the kitchen to start dinner, as they hadn't gone out to eat after practice.

"I can make dinner if you want to rest, hyung." Hyungwon offered from the doorway.

"No, it's okay. I just need to do something normal for a minute." Kihyun said, trying to laugh it off.

Despite having been turned down, Hyungwon walked into the kitchen and began helping with dinner anyways. "Are you alright?" he asked.

"Yeah, yeah, fine." Kihyun answered, which sounded like a lie, even to him. Hyungwon let it go anyways.

The two stood together in the kitchen, chopping various vegetables and mixing ingredients. When dinner was ready, the others all rushed in to eat. Kihyun put aside a small portion for himself and told the others he was headed off to shower and would eat later.

After he had showered and eaten by himself, he stared up at the ceiling of his shared bedroom for hours before finally being able to fall asleep. He knew he shouldn't be pushing the others away as he was, that it wasn't fair to them and that he was probably worrying them. The thought made guilt settle into his stomach, but he shook it off, vowing to try harder tomorrow.

~~~

When Kihyun stumbled out of bed and down the hallway, his usual hour earlier than the others, he was surprised to see Hyunwoo in the kitchen already.

"Hyung?" Kihyun asked groggily.

"Hey, Ki. I made breakfast," Hyunwoo greeted, gesturing to the bowls on the table. Kihyun sighed thankfully. He was really in no state to be cooking this early in the morning.

The two sat down next to each other to eat, munching in comfortable silence. "Thanks, hyung." Kihyun said, and before he could talk himself out of it, he was giving Hyunwoo a sideways hug, hesitantly resting his head on the older's shoulder for a moment before springing up and grabbing his things. 

The walk to the vocal studio was short, and Kihyun had apparently beaten his new vocal instructor to the room. Kihyun sighed, trying not to get too worked up. The last time he had gotten a new instructor, she had been rude and snappy, and Kihyun could do absolutely  _nothing_ right to please her. 

Kihyun had his back turned, leaning to pull out a few things from his bag when he heard the door to the studio open and close. He turned to greet the newcomer, a smile and a greeting on his lips, before freezing completely. The headphones and notebook he had been holding in his hands tumbled to the floor with a loud crash. 

Kihyun choked out a gasp, backing up towards the corner of the room. It couldn't be. How the  _hell_ was he here? Kihyun suddenly couldn't breathe.

"Oh shit." The newcomer said upon recognizing the now shaking figure in the corner of the room. "Kihyun, I didn't know, I'm so sorry, I'll leave-" he said, turning to open the door. Kihyun was practically ready to cry in relief, before the man hesitated, closing the door again, turning to face Kihyun.

"You can't tell anyone. Please, Kihyun, it was so hard to get this job." he said, and Kihyun couldn't even look at him. He felt sick to his stomach.  _Of course._ Vocal instructor. That was how they had met in the first place.

The man took a step towards Kihyun when he didn't answer, and Kihyun flinched. "O-ok, I won't tell anyone." His heart was beating so rapidly that it  _hurt._

After a pause, the man took another step forward, eyeing Kihyun up and down. Kihyun still hadn't looked up. 

"God, I forgot how cute you are." he said, taking yet another step. Kihyun was shaking. He had been so close to leaving, why couldn't he just  _leave_ -

But then the man was inches away from him, and Kihyun was shaking so hard, eyes gone glassy with tears. "Please, Erik, I won't tell anyone-" 

Hands violently shoved him against the wall, holding him in a firm grasp. " _Erik?_ " He hissed out, "And where the  _hell_ have your manners gone, you little shit?"

"S-sir!" Kihyun felt sick saying the word, and even sicker at how easily he was falling back into his former caregivers grasp. "I-I'm sorry," Kihyun choked out, sobbing now. 

Erik let out a  _tsk_ , stepping back slightly from Kihyun. "Jesus, I'm not around for a while and you've already forgotten everything I've taught you?" Kihyun didn't respond, still shaking like a leaf under Erik's gaze. 

"You know what to do to make it up to me though, don't you, baby?" Kihyun felt strong hands sharply press down on his shoulders, sending him to his knees. 

At this point, Kihyun couldn't breathe, let alone see through his tears. His breathing was ragged, heart beating erratically against his chest. He was panicking. All he wanted was Hyunwoo, or Changkyun, or Hoseok - 

The sound of a zipper being undone yanked him out of his daze. Hyunwoo. Changkyun. Hoseok. Caregivers who treated him like  _caregivers_ were supposed to. Caregivers who were nothing like the monster in front of him. Unlike before, Kihyun knew how he deserved to be treated. And it certainly wasn't how Erik was treating him now.

In a moment of blind courage, Kihyun shoved against Erik's legs, knocking him off his feet and sending him backwards into a desk. It must have hurt, given the yell Erik let out, but Kihyun wasn't about to stick around to see the damage. 

Kihyun yanked the studio door open, running blindly down the hall. His breathing was ragged, vision still blurry from tears. He heard the door open again behind him and fresh wave of terror ran through him. Erik was  _chasing_ him. Didn't he realize that there were people out here? People perfectly capable of calling the police? But Erik apparently didn't care about that, and that scared Kihyun even more. 

Kihyun rounded the corner and was about cry even harder because there was _Hyunwoo,_ and Kihyun literally  _collided_ with the older, clinging to him like his life depended on it.

Hyunwoo, quite understandably, was incredibly alarmed when a sobbing mess of Kihyun landed in his arms after rounding the corner in a full-fledged sprint. "Hyung, Hyung-" Kihyun sobbed into his chest, and Hyunwoo was beyond confused. What the hell was going on? Who had scared Kihyun like this?

Hyunwoo suddenly became aware of another figure running down the hallway, and he instinctively held Kihyun tighter. The man stopped upon seeing Hyunwoo holding Kihyun. In a blind rage, the man made the mistake of reaching out as if to grab Kihyun. "Give him to me." he growled.

And suddenly it all clicked. This must be _him._ The man who had hurt Kihyun. Hyunwoo saw red.

"What's going on?" Changkyun asked, coming out of the practice room, which Kihyun and Hyunwoo were standing a small distance from. Hoseok and Jooheon joined him in the hallway.

"Jooheon," Hyunwoo said, in a tone that Kihyun had _never_ heard him use before."I need you to take Kihyun."

The younger immediately stepped forward, prying a very reluctant Kihyun from Hyunwoo's arms.

"No, he'll hurt you hyung, no!" Kihyun cried, trying to grab for Hyunwoo again, but Jooheon was stronger, holding Kihyun securely in his arms.

The man smirked, and suddenly it dawned on everyone else in the hallway who this man was. Jooheon saw the immediate shift in Hoseok, who had initially moved as if to be a barrier between the man and Hyunwoo. Hoseok now turned his body completely towards the newcomer, as did Changkyun.

"You heard him, ' _hyung_ '" the man said mockingly, and suddenly Hyunwoo could no longer hold back. He launched forward, grabbing the man's collar and yanking him towards him, glaring down at the man.

Erik laughed, noticing Hyunwoo's hesitance. "God, what a bunch of softies. No wonder why Kihyunnie was so  _disobedient_ ," he spat out, and then Hoseok was stepping forward, because if Hyunwoo wasn't going to beat the shit out of this man than he sure as hell was.

Hyunwoo beat him to it, however. He swung his arm back, colliding with Erik's jaw with a sickening _crack._ Erik stepped back, hand coming to his face, eyes wide. He honestly hadn't thought any of them would have it in them to actually  _hit_ him, and, upon noticing the three men in the hallway beginning to close in on him, he attempted to turn tail and run.

Hoseok, however, was having none of it. He yanked the man back, slamming him into the wall. "You're not leaving unless it's in a body bag," he spat, yanking Erik forward and then slamming him back into the wall again. 

Yelling was heard from down the hall, a voice Hoseok faintly registered as belonging to one of their managers. "What the hell?!" The manager yelled, now rushing down the hall.

Changkyun intercepted the manager, informing him of what was going on. The manager took one look at Kihyun and nodded his head, eyes wide in understanding. He pulled out his phone to dial the police, all while Hoseok still had Erik pinned to the wall.

"Hyung," Changkyun said, trying to pull Hoseok away, but he shrugged him off. 

"No, I'm not letting go of him until he's in cuffs." 

And in cuffs he was soon enough. The police arrived, Changkyun having to talk Hoseok down before he let go of Erik, giving one last shove for good measure. Erik was hauled off by the police, a few officers staying behind, most likely to question Kihyun.

Kihyun was still crying, hidden in Jooheon's chest. An officer tentatively approached him, asking him if he felt up to giving his report. Kihyun nodded, shakily pulling away from Jooheon, following the officer into the practice room. 

Hyunwoo was stood to the side, still shaking. Minhyuk and Hyungwon, who had come out of the practice room shortly after hearing the commotion, both looked pale and uncertain of what to do. Hoseok was pacing, aggravated once again by the officers telling him that Kihyun had to give his report alone.

"Hyung," Minhyuk tried, gently reaching for Hyunwoo's hand, which had apparently been bleeding. Hyunwoo hadn't noticed.

He followed Minhyuk into the bathroom, allowing him to clean up his hand. Hyunwoo hadn't noticed he'd was crying until Minhyuk gasped, then pulled him into his chest.

"Oh, hyung," Minhyuk breathed shakily, and then they both were crying. "I know."

"That was  _him,_ " Hyunwoo said angrily, pulling away from Minhyuk. "Why didn't I kill him? I should have  _killed_ him." Hyunwoo said, slamming his hand down against the porcelain sink.

"Because you're better than he is." Minhyuk answered, "And Kihyun is going to need you around, not in jail. We all do." Minhyuk laughed slightly, trying to lighten the mood. 

They left the bathroom, walking back to the others. Changkyun hadn't moved from his spot against the wall. Jooheon had taken Hoseok's place at pacing in front of the door of the room that held Kihyun. Hyungwon was sat on the floor, eyes cast downwards. Hoseok approached the two, running a hand through his hair.

Hyunwoo noticed Hoseoks eyes were red from holding back from tears, and he was sure that a glance at any of the others would reveal that they were in similar emotional states as well.

The door to the practice room opened, and all eyes shot to Kihyun as he exited the practice room with a police officer. Their manager approached the group, expression forlorn. "You guys have the next week off. And Kihyun, you have as much time as you need. I am so sorry that this happened. Our background checks are usually extremely thorough, and you can believe that I'll be investigating how the hell that man got through our checks."

"Not your fault." Kihyun muttered softly. "He doesn't have a record." 

Their manager took in a sharp breath. "Oh," he uttered, gaze soft on Kihyun. "Alright then. You all head home, I'll work everything out from the business end of things." 

The group nodded to the manager, heading off with Kihyun. As they lived right above their practice space, they didn't have a long walk to their dorm by any means, but they all thought that it felt like an eternity. 

Hyunwoo felt a hand slip in his own, glancing down to see Kihyun's hand laced with his. He squeezed it gently, but Kihyun's eyes continued to be locked on the ground.

Hyunwoo pulled Kihyun along with him and the rest of the group into the living room, where they all sat down in various places. When Kihyun went to sit, he winced slightly, causing Hyunwoo's heart to stop. Around the room, the others all had a similar sinking feeling of horror. 

"Kihyun," he began, "he didn't..." Kihyun looked up at him, confusion lacing his features.

"What?" he asked.

"Y-you winced. Did he..." Hyunwoo trailed off, unable to say the words.

Kihyun's eyes widened in understanding. "N-no!" he stammered, "I got slammed into the wall, but I pushed him b-before he c-could, you know..." he trailed off, unable to say any more.

"Oh, baby." Hoseok said, sitting down on the side of the couch opposite of Hyunwoo. "I'm so sorry none of us were there." 

"Not your fault," Kihyun said for the second time that night. "It's mine for not being stronger."

"Hyung, no." Jooheon said, sliding down to sit at Kihyun's feet. "You're literally the strongest person I know." 

Kihyun's grip on Hyunwoo's hand tightened, "He didn't know he was going to be teaching me. At first he begged me not to tell anyone, because he didn't want to loose his job," Kihyun laughed bitterly. After a pause, he continued. 

"H-he got mad that I said his name. Erik. Because I'm supposed to call him Sir," Kihyun was suddenly rambling, tears streaming down his face again, "He got so mad that I forgot my 'manners', and he went to push me down but I - I thought about all of you and then I pushed him." 

"Oh, baby," Hyunwoo said, pulling Kihyun into his chest, where the boy proceeded to climb into his lap and cling to him, crying hard into his chest. 

For a while, the group sat in the living room together, listening to Kihyun's sobs gradually become softer and softer, until eventually he was breathing calmly, fast asleep against Hyunwoo's chest.

~~~

The next day was an odd one. 

Kihyun woke up in little space.

Changkyun, who had previously been tossing and turning in a restless sleep after the events of the day before, was awoken by a body climbing into his bed and settling on his chest. He looked up, fully expecting to see a tuft of blonde hair belonging to Jooheon, but was shocked when he was confronted with the soft brown locks of Kihyun's hair.

"Kihyun?" Changkyun asked in disbelief. 

"Papa," Kihyun mumbled, almost immediately falling back asleep on Changkyun's chest. 

Well  _this_ was new.  _Papa?_ Jooheon and Minhyuk usually just called him 'Kun' when they were in little space, he had never gotten a nickname like Hyunwoo had with Appa, or Hoseok with Daddy.

A warm feeling seeped into Changkyun's chest as he watched Kihyun sleep peacefully. He ran his hands though his hair, closing his eyes while listening to Kihyun breathe. 

Despite everything that had happened the day before, Kihyun would be okay. He had the love and support of his group, and he was in no way facing any of this alone. 

Just the fact that Kihyun was in little space, and had been comfortable enough to climb into Changkyun's bed was alone enough to show he was making some progress. And now, with Erik heading off to spend time behind bars, hopefully Kihyun would be able to move on and put that part of his life behind him.

Changkyun held Kihyun tighter, silently making a promise to help him through this in whatever way he could. Kihyun had good people around him now, all of which wanted nothing but to care for and love him. And Changkyun knew that would be enough for Kihyun to get through this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! Here are some ideas I have for potential parts of this series. Let me know in the comments what you would like to see!
> 
> 1\. Little Jooheon jealous about all of the attention little Kihyun is getting.  
> 2\. One of the littles getting lost. (Let me know which one if you have a preference!)  
> 3\. Kihyun sees/hears one of the other littles getting in trouble, leading him to have to confront his fear of punishment.  
> 4\. One of the littles slip during a performance or fan sign.  
> 5\. Hyungwon character development. As Hyungwon is a neutral, this would be looking at how he fits into the group dynamic.


	4. Hyungwon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hyungwon, and how he fits in with the group dynamic as a neutral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! As voted upon, here is the Hyungwon centric chapter, which hopefully clears a few things up. This tackles his background, and ended up coming out a bit sadder than I had intended?? My apologies. If anyone would like to see a fluffier part two to this, let me know!

It was a few days after Kihyun's former caregiver had been arrested, and Kihyun had been little the  _entire time_ they had been given off, as had Minhyuk and Jooheon.

Hyungwon was exhausted. He had been taking care of both Jooheon and Minhyuk  _much_ more than usual. Normally, he would have absolutely no problem looking after the littles, and he definitely loved spending time with the boys, but Hyungwon could only handle so much.

Unlike Changkyun, Hoseok, and Hyunwoo, Hyungwon was a neutral. This meaning that, while Hyungwon enjoyed looking after his littles, he wasn't built for it like the groups official caregivers were. While Hyungwon could take care of one or both of the littles for a few hours here and there if the caregivers needed a break, he wasn't equipped to handle taking care of them both for  _days._

It wasn't like he hadn't gotten a break - no, Hyunwoo especially had been sure to check in with the younger frequently to see how he was holding up. Jooheon had been clinging to Hyungwon a great deal more than normal, which all of the group had thought of as odd. Usually, Jooheon stuck to Changkyun like glue while he was little, but the blonde had resisted all of Changkyun's efforts to spend time with him, which had understandably confused everyone. 

It seemed as if the addition of little Kihyun was affecting everyone in some unforeseen way.

Don't get him wrong, Hyungwon was  _so glad_ Kihyun was no longer repressing himself. He was ecstatic that the younger was finally comfortable enough to go into his headspace around them. But what he hadn't expected was the chain reaction that had followed. The three caregivers had naturally been giving Kihyun more attention than he could ever ask for, and Minhyuk had also been acting as a big brother to Kihyun when he wasn't with Hyungwon.

But Hyungwon had been looking after one little or another for three days straight, and he was  _tired._ On top of that, he kept feeling this strange prickling sensation in the back of his head which he was nervous was about transform into a migraine, or something worse.

Additionally, Hyungwon had to push down the jealously of having not even properly _met_ little Kihyun yet. The little had been so well taken care of by the caregivers that he hadn't had to come searching out Hyungwon like Jooheon or Minhyuk sometimes did if whichever caregivers were home got tired or needed to leave for practice or take a break. He tried not to feel bad about Kihyun not being interested in him, pushing if off as he was still getting used to his new surroundings, caregivers, and other littles he was now around. Hyngwon shouldn't feel bad that Kihyun wasn't all that interested in a neutral.

Hyungwon had always been insecure about being a neutral. He had always wanted to take care of littles, but whenever he had voiced this during his school days, he had been laughed at. His mom was the only one who understood, and she had frequently reassured him that someday, he would find a little that would love him, if that's what he wanted. 

But Hyngwon wasn't sure if that  _was_ what he wanted. Sure, he loved taking care of the littles now and then, and had been thrilled to find a family that even  _trusted_ him to look after the littles, but he didn't think he could do it full time, like caregivers do. Hyungwon wasn't even sure that he trusted himself to look after the littles alone, but Hoseok, Changkyun, and Hyunwoo constantly reassured him that he was fully capable, and that the littles absolutely adored him.

Despite that, Hyungwon still always had that nagging, prickling sensation in the back of his head if he was left with the littles for too long, or if he got too stressed. He had given in to it once back in his school years, and the outcome had terrified him.

Hyungwon had dropped into little space. 

So ever since then, he was always the slightest bit reluctant to be left alone with the littles, scared that he would slip himself and not be able to take care of the ones who actually needed him. The thought terrified him. 

Hyungwon was luckily very able to control the nagging tightness in the back of his head. Unlike an actual little, he didn't  _need_ to drop, and it was impossible for a neutral to get into little space without the exact right set of circumstances. A neutral going into little space in itself was  _extremely_ rare, almost unheard of. But of course Hyungwon had to be the exception.

Sometimes, while watching one of the three caregivers take care of the littles, Hyungwon's mind would wander  _just_ enough for him to lift his hand to pick up a toy and start playing too, but he would always stop himself at the last second. Hyungwon refused to be more of a burden than he already was to the group.

Despite the others constantly telling him how much they all loved him, the littles telling him that he was always perfect to them when they were their most vulnerable, Hyungwon was still deeply insecure about his status. 

And now, after three days of playing with one little or the other, constantly chasing the two around to make sure they would't get hurt, Hyungwon was  _done._ He hadn't had a break longer than an hour here and there, aside from sleeping, as, despite Hyunwoo's best efforts, Jooheon seemed to be dead set on being around Hyungwon.

"Come on bud, don't you want to spend some time with your Appa? Or daddy? Or Kun?" Hyungwon said to Jooheon, who was currently trying to climb on top of the taller to cuddle for the fourteenth time that day. 

"No, want you Won Won," the little mumbled, clinging to Hyungwon tighter. Hyungwon sighed, it had been at least worth a try. Even though he'd tried it several times already that day.

"Honey, whats up with you, huh? You've been acting weird since Kihyun-" The younger shifted, letting out an irritated huff.  _There we go_. 

"Are you upset with Kihyunnie? Did he do something?" Hyungwon asked, knowing full well how little Jooheon could hold a grudge.

"Steal Kunnie," the blonde mumbled.  _So_ ** _that's_**   _why he's been acting so weird._  Changkyun usually spent the most time with Jooheon out of all the littles, as they just had some sort of special bond, Hyungwon guessed. He didn't really understand why some littles felt more comfortable with certain caregivers over others.

"Bud, Kun has been taking care of Kihyunnie, don't you remember all the special attention you got when you were little with them for the first time?" Hyungwon nudged gently. Jooheon didn't answer, opting to hide his head and bring his thumb to his mouth.

"Uh uh uh, bud. You know the rules." Hyungwon said, removing Jooheon's thumb from his mouth and replacing it with a pacifier. That was _really_ off. Jooheon hadn't tried sucking his thumb in over a year, as he knew it was against the rules, he knew he was supposed to use his pacifier if he needed it.

Hyungwon took note of this, sure to let the caregivers know about how Jooheon was feeling about little Kihyun, and that he was so unsure of how to deal with his emotions that he had broken a small rule.

In general, despite being the main troublemaker of the house, Jooheon was incredibly well behaved. Hyungwon had heard horror stories from other groups in the industry about how their littles behaved, and it had only served to make him more grateful about the family he had to go back home to.

Hyungwon had eventually started to nod off on the couch with Jooheon, but the little had other ideas. "Wan' play?" he asked, gently tugging on Hyungwon's hand.

Hyungwon groaned, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. He had been so close to falling asleep he could cry.

"In a minute, bud," Hyungwon slurred sleepily. Closing his eyes for a few moments couldn't hurt, right?

Jooheon shrugged, plopping down on the floor to start playing. A glance at the couch revealed Hyungwon was already fast asleep. 

Jooheon quickly grew bored of playing however, and decided to wander off to find something else to do. He spotted a couple of his other toys placed on one of their shelves in the living room, only a few feet away from where Hyungwon was sleeping on the couch. He bit his lip, knowing he was supposed to ask someone for help with getting toys down from where they stored them when the boys weren't in their headspace, but Hyungwon looked so tired, and the shelf wasn't really  _that_ high.

Jooheon reached up, standing on his tip toes on the bottom ledge of the shelf. He had just grasped the body of one of his action figures when he lost his footing, tumbling down, knocking his arm on the end of their coffee table in the process. 

For a moment, Jooheon was too stunned to breathe. But once he registered what had happened, and that his arm was  _bleeding_ , he let out a loud cry, effectively starting Hyungwon out of his sleep. The older shot up, looking around frantically. Upon spotting Jooheon, Hyungwon rushed over, desperately trying to soothe the little.

Hyungwon was devastated. This was his worst nightmare. One of his littles, his boys, was hurt because he had been too tired to stay awake and look after him. His laziness had resulted in Jooheon getting hurt. Hyungwon's head was spinning.

"Shh, bud, it's okay," Hyungwon said, reaching for Jooheon's injured arm. 

To Hyungwon's disbelief, the little jerked violently away from him, pushing his hands away. "No! Wan' Kunnie, not you!" he cried.

Hyungwon was crushed. Of course Jooheon wouldn't want him to comfort him. He wasn't a caregiver.

Hyungwon barely registered Changkyun rushing into the room, staring on at how effortless it was for Changkyun to calm Jooheon down, how quickly the little trusted Changkyun to take care of his injury. Changkyun ushered Jooheon off to the bathroom, most likely to clean the wound.

But Hyungwon was still frozen on the floor where the two had left him. He had let Jooheon get hurt. The others had trusted him to look after the littles, and Hyungwon had let them down. Who was he kidding? He was a neutral, he wasn't supposed to take care of littles anyways, the others were foolish to have trusted him, he never should have-

"Hyungwon?!" a voice asked, shaking his shoulders. Hyungwon snapped out of his thoughts, eyes meeting Hyunwoo's. Hyungwon realized with embarrassment that he was crying. He quickly freed himself from Hyunwoo's grip, shooting to his feet. He turned away from the older, wiping his eyes harshly.

"What happened? Why are you crying?" Hyunwoo asked, concerned eyes meeting his. And this was all wrong, Hyunwoo shouldn't be standing here worrying about him, he should be with the people that he was  _actually_ supposed to be taking care of, not fretting over the emotions of a neutral.

"Is this about Jooheon? He's totally fine, Changkyun's got him out eating lunch in the kitchen with the others." 

"Oh, okay." Hyungwon nodded, turning as if to leave, but a hand on his arm stopped him.

"Hyung," Hyungwon whined, wiping at his eyes again. All he wanted was to sneak off to his bedroom to hopefully sleep off this horrible feeling of having let all of his group down, let alone that  _stupid_ feeling in the back of his head that was threatening to swallow him whole.

"Do you really think I'm going to let you leave without you telling me what's wrong?" Hyunwoo asked, steering the two to the couch. After several awkward moments of Hyungwon staring at his feet, Hyunwoo interrupted the silence.

"Is it because Jooheon got hurt?" he asked. 

Hyungwon nodded. "Yeah. And I let you all down. You trusted me to take care of them and I failed." Hyungwon said, swallowing more tears.

"Oh, Hyungwon, no. You do such an amazing job with them. Those two get hurt all the time, even when  _Hoseok_ is looking after them," Hyunwoo let out a laugh at that, as Hoseok was most definitely over protective with the boys, doing everything in his power to make sure they never got hurt. It always failed, however, as their boys had the energy of children and were constantly getting into things. "I don't think either of them have ever gotten hurt with you, and there's no way I could be mad at you for this. Jooheon knows he's not supposed to try to reach things on the shelf."

Hyunwoo's words had made Hyungwon feel slightly better, "but Hyung, I fell asleep. I was just so  _tired_ from watching them both so much, not that I don't love it, but I'm not built for it like you guys are. Jooheon didn't even trust me to see his arm when he fell, and I just, I'm," Hyungwon sighed, struggling to find his words. "I'm sorry." he finally settled on, tears clouding his vision once again.

Hyunwoo felt as if he was beginning to pick up on something. "Hyungwon, can I ask you something?" he asked.

Hyunwoo was desperately trying to think back to his classes on caregiving during school, to remember if neutrals ever needed to enter a headspace. He was certain he had been taught that neutrals were just that; neutral, and that they didn't need to assume the role of either a caregiver or little. 

But all of the signs Hyungwon were giving him right now were screaming at him that he needed to enter a headspace. Hyungwon was shaking, breathing erratically, and struggling with emotions he wasn't sure how to deal with. His speech was broken up, and he wasn't exuding the confidence he usually did.

"Do you need to be little?" Hyunwoo eventually asked after not receiving a response from Hyungwon.

At his question, Hyungwon's eyes shot up, wide in disbelief. "No! Absolutely not! I-I've never, I don't need to-"

Hyunwoo pulled Hyungwon into his side, wrapping him in a hug. He knew the younger was lying, that much was obvious. When Hyungwon didn't pull away, Hyunwoo took that as a sign that he wasn't overstepping any boundaries. 

After Hyungwon had calmed down, he eventually mumbled out, "It happened once. Years ago. I never felt like I was going to actually slip again until today."

"Why didn't you tell us?" Hyunwoo asked, carding fingers through the youngers hair.

"I didn't think I needed to. It was only once, and like I said, years ago. I've never felt that bad again until today."

"If you ever need to, you know we would all be happy to take care of you." 

Hyungwon fought his urge to argue, sighing in defeat. He pulled away from Hyunwoo, sending him a fake smile.

"Yeah, I know."

~~~

The next day, after Hyungwon had finally been allowed some sleep, he awoke feeling refreshed. The prickling feeling behind his eyes was finally gone, and he felt drastically less stressed than he had the day before. He was still slightly embarrassed at the conversation Hyunwoo and he had had the night before, but he decided to just shrug it off and let it go. 

Hyungwon entered the kitchen, hearing the sounds of playing coming from the living room, meaning that the littles were still little. Hyungwon was glad at that; all the members had deserved a break. 

Hyungwon was also glad that Jooheon seemed fine being with the caregivers for now, which meant his break was still on.

He heard footsteps approaching the kitchen as he slid a piece of bread into the toaster, turning to see who had entered.

To his surprise, Kihyun was standing there. The boy looked as though he had just woken up, and was still rubbing sleep out of his eyes with one hand while the other held the stuffed dog he had grown so attached to. 

Hyungwon's eyes widened as the little shuffled tiredly towards him, eyes widening even more when Kihyun wrapped his arms around him, murmuring a tired, "Hi, Won Won," into his chest before pulling away and heading into the living room after he heard Minhyuk's voice.

Hyungwon stood there for a moment, smile gracing his lips. Kihyun hadn't been the least bit wary of him, and Hyungwon was thrilled. 

With a grin, Hyungwon pulled his toast from the toaster. Maybe things could get back to normal after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I keep writing emotional stuff, I'm intentionally making the next chapter an extremely fluffy one to give you guys a break! I am also not opposed to writing Hyungwon in little space if anyone wants that! 
> 
> Here are the remaining ideas I have, let me know which you would like to see! And feel free to comment your own ideas as well!
> 
> 1\. Little Jooheon jealous about all of the attention little Kihyun is getting.  
> 2\. One of the littles getting lost. (Let me know which one if you have a preference!)  
> 3\. Kihyun sees/hears one of the other littles getting in trouble, leading him to have to confront his fear of punishment.  
> 4\. One of the littles slip during a performance or fan sign.


	5. Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lost littles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know I promised fluff, and I sat down fully intending to deliver, but that's not quite what happened lol. I tried to add some fluff at the end, but I am apparently incapable of writing fluff and only fluff for an entire chapter. So here is another of the voted on prompts! 
> 
> I have included some questions for you guys in the end notes, so please read them and leave a comment if you'd like!

Minhyuk wasn't sure how it had happened.

After a long day of practice, Kihyun had slipped into little space in the practice room. The others had been surprised at first, but Hoseok was the first to feel relieved. Kihyun had been putting off being little due to their busy schedules, and Hoseok knew Kihyun needed a break.

Minhyuk, who hadn't been little at the time, had dropped into his headspace nearly instantly at Kihyun running up to him and crashing into his legs, excitedly exclaiming, "Min Min!"

The two rolled around on the floor hugging for a few moments, until Kihyun's stomach let out a rumble. "Kihyunnie is hungry, Daddy!" Minhyuk reported. Hoseok had 'secretly' tasked Minhyuk with looking after Kihyun, telling Minhyuk to let him know if Kihyun was ever hungry or needed anything, as Kihyun was still nervous and reluctant to ask for things.

Kihyun looked at Minhyuk in confusion, glancing nervously at the others in the room. "Good job, Min," Hoseok praised, "And as for you," Hoseok smiled warmly at Kihyun, scooping him up into his arms, making Kihyun let out an adorable giggle. "Lets get you fed, bean."

As a few hours of practice still remained, the others were going to stay behind to practice a bit longer. Hoseok made his way out of the building, two littles in tow - Kihyun on his back, Minhyuk's hand clasped firmly in his. Hoseok vaguely registered that this was the first time Kihyun had been out of the dorm while in little space. He smiled faintly at that. They had come quite a long way in just a few weeks.

Upon arriving at a small mobile restaurant, Hoseok placed Kihyun down on the floor. After telling Minhyuk to keep a hold of Kihyun's hand no matter what, he turned to the worker and began to list off his order. He planned to take it to go, in order for Kihyun to be the most comfortable. He could tell being out in public was putting Kihyun on edge.

Minhyuk noticed this too, and he wanted to be a good big brother and help Kihyun feel better. He looked around, hand still clasped firmly with Kihyun's. Minhyuk nearly shrieked when he noticed that the cart next door had a dog hooked to a fence post beside it. Minhyuk pulled Kihyun along, walking the small distance to the dog. Minhyuk was sure to make sure that Hoseok was still within seeing and hearing distance, as he didn't want to get lost. Not _again_.

Kihyun spotted the dog just as Minhyuk finished asking the man behind the cart if they could pet it. Kihyun seemed wary, nervously glancing between the dog, Minhyuk, and back over his shoulder at Hoseok. 

"C'mon Ki, it's okay, he's nice, see?" Minhyuk said, crouching down next to the dog, who lapped at his hand and wagged his tail happily at the attention. "He's just like Bark!" 

And Kihyun was sucked right in because Minhyuk was _right_ , the dog did look just like his beloved stuffed toy. Kihyun crouched down on the ground next to Minhyuk, gently reaching his hand out to pet the dog. The dog smiled lopsidedly, licking excitedly at Kihyun's hand, and letting out a small bark. The bark caused Kihyun to erupt into laughter. "It's Bark!" 

Minhyuk smiled proudly. Kihyun was happy because of him. He had to tell Hoseok!

But when Minhyuk stood and looked around, an all-too familiar feeling of panic began to wash over him. 

Hoseok wasn't at the cart, where he just was, anymore. 

Minhyuk's head spun around nervously, trying to spot Hoseok in the crowd.  _When had it gotten so crowded?_

Minhyuk looked back down at Kihyun, who was still happily playing with the dog. He bit his lip nervously, trying to remember what he did the last time he was lost, but he was beginning to panic.

Minhyuk liked to wander while in little space, and he was easily distracted. He had not once, but twice been lost at the mall when he had spotted something cute and wandered off to investigate.

But this time was different. This time, Hoseok had told him to look after Kihyun. Kihyun was his responsibility, and he had gotten them both lost. Minhyuk bit back tears.  _Daddy is going to be so mad at me._

"Min Min?" Kihyun asked, standing up and eyeing Minhyuk worriedly. Kihyun looked behind Minhyuk, eyes scanning for Hoseok. Upon not seeing him where he was before, Kihyun looked up at Minhyuk with scared eyes.

"Min Min, where Daddy?" Kihyun asked, lip wobbling.

"Oh no, don't cry, Kihyunnie! It's okay," Minhyuk searched desperately for another option that _wasn't_ telling Kihyun that he had managed to get them both lost. "Daddy's hiding! Like in hide-and-seek!" 

It didn't seem to calm Kihyun down a lot, but his lip stopped wobbling, so Minhyuk counted it as a win. "We go look?" he asked.

"Yeah, let's go look. You've gotta help me though!" Minhyuk smiled, hand clutching desperately tightly at Kihyun's. He would  _not_ lose Kihyun too.

The two walked up and down the street a few times, keeping their eyes open for Hoseok. Minhyuk was growing more and more anxious. Suddenly, Kihyun stopped walking, and Minhyuk noticed he was crying.

"Wan' Daddy stop hiding," he cried, tugging on Minhyuk's hand. "Where Daddy?" he asked again.

Minhyuk was having a  _very_ hard time holding it together. He was  _scared._ They had been lost for around a half an hour, longer than Minhyuk had ever been before. One of the caregivers had always found him relatively quickly when he wandered off. But now Kihyun was looking up at him, his big brother, with watery eyes and all Minhyuk wanted was to make it better. 

Kihyun's face suddenly fell even further, "He not want us?" Kihyun asked, now crying harder. 

Minhyuk knew what he needed to do. He pulled Kihyun to the side of the street, where it was quieter. He squeezed his eyes shut, breathing deeply. He needed to be big. Little Minhyuk was failing Kihyun, but Big Minhyuk would know what to do to make Kihyun feel better.

When he opened his eyes again, Minhyuk was in his adult headspace. He scooped Kihyun into his arms, whispering soothing things into his hair until he calmed down. "Daddy would never leave us baby, we're gonna go hunt him down right now!" he said, heading off down the road and back to the practice building. He had checked both his and Kihyun's pockets for a cellphone, but had remembered Hoseok had taken them before they had set out to get dinner. Minhyuk had a tendency to lose his while in little space. Now that he was able to think clearly, he knew the best idea would be to head back to the practice room and have one of the others call Hoseok.

Oh god,  _Hoseok._ He must be so worried. Minhyuk picked up his pace, making it back to the practice room in record time. But upon entering, he was even more confused. 

No one was there.

"Guys?" Minhyuk called out, echoing through the halls. No response. 

Kihyun seemed to be becoming aware of what was going on and where they were. "Min Min," he cried into the olders shoulder "I don't wanna play seek any more!" 

"I know, me neither, baby." Minhyuk tried to soothe, rubbing a hand up and down Kihyun's back. Minhyuk was about to head out of the building to start searching the streets again, but the sound of footsteps stopped him. 

"Hello?" he called out, fingers crossed.  _Please, please,_ _please -_

"Minhyuk?!" Jooheon yelled, running down the hall. Upon seeing the two, Minhyuk moving to set Kihyun down, Jooheon sighed a huge breath of relief. "Oh thank  _god,"_ he said, pulling out his phone and calling Hyunwoo, letting them know where they all were.

"What the hell happened? Hyung said he was ordering food and when he turned around you two were gone! He was hysterical when he came back," Jooheon rushed out.

"I was little, and you know how I can be," Minhyuk said, running a hand through his hair nervously. "Ki was nervous and I saw a dog so I tried to make him feel better, and the next thing I knew, Hoseok-hyung was gone. God, he's going to be so  _mad_ at me for getting lost again, let alone with  _Kihyun-"_

"Daddy mad?" Kihyun asked, staring helplessly up at Jooheon and Minhyuk. Jooheon sent Minhyuk an  _are you serious_ look, leaning down to comfort Kihyun.

But, even the two of them combined weren't enough to calm the little down. On the flip side, Kihyun's emotional state was tugging both Jooheon and Minhyuk closer and closer to their headspaces. Neither of them knew what to do; Minhyuk had tried to comfort Kihyun like Hyunwoo did with him if he got upset, but nothing was working. Just as it seemed that all hope was lost, Hyungwon, Changkyun, Hyunwoo, and Hoseok rounded the corner, rushing towards the three huddled together on the floor of the practice room.

"Daddy!" Kihyun cried out brokenly, reaching his arms up to the caregiver. Hoseok, who looked absolutely disheveled, reached down and pulled a sobbing Kihyun into his arms, picking him up and pacing around the room with him, trying to calm him down.

After seeing that Kihyun was being taken care of, Minhyuk's shoulders finally slumped. Little side taking over, his eyes filled with tears as he stared down at his lap, ashamed. He had let his caregivers down. Hyunwoo crouched down in front of Minhyuk, tilting his head up by his chin. 

"Oh, Min," and that's all it took for Minhyuk to start crying, blubbering out apologies and trying to explain what happened. Hyunwoo only shushed him, pulling him close, relieved that the two littles were safe.

~~~

Once the group was back at the dorm, Hoseok pulled out the meal he had ordered what felt like ages ago, passing it off to Changkyun, who pulled Jooheon along with him into the kitchen. Hyunwoo had somehow managed to calm Minhyuk down, though it had taken lots of reassurance that no one was mad at him, and he certainly wasn't in trouble. Hyunwoo was amazed at how seriously Minhyuk was taking his big-brother role, and he was proud of Minhyuk for handling the situation the way he did, which he was sure to voice to the younger repeatedly.

Once Minhyuk had calmed down, Hyunwoo had encouraged him to go eat with Jooheon, who was out in the kitchen with Changkyun. Minhyuk happily obliged. Hyungwon trailed after them to help get dinner ready.

In the living room, Hoseok was sat on the couch with Kihyun, who absolutely refused to let go of the older. Even when Hyunwoo had offered to take him so that Hoseok could eat, the little shook his head and buried his head further into Hoseok's neck.

Hoseok wasn't sure what to do. The couple of times Minhyuk had gotten lost, he had never acted like this. Sure, he'd been clingy for a few minutes, but it quickly faded back into his curious personality. With Kihyun, however, he seemed unable to let Hoseok out of his sight for fear of losing him again.

Hoseok was filled to the brim with guilt. He had turned away from the littles for just a few seconds to order, and then they were  _gone_. Hoseok had ruined Kihyun's first experience as a little in public with him. 

"Baby," Hoseok tried once again, running a hand through Kihyun's hair. "Can you tell Daddy what's wrong?" 

The little turned his head slightly in order to be able to speak. "Don't like hide seek, Daddy." he mumbled.

For a moment, Hoseok was confused. Then it clicked - Minhyuk must have told Kihyun that they were playing Hide-and-Seek when he couldn't find Hoseok. He smiled fondly.

"That's okay baby, we'll never play it again," Hoseok promised. Kihyun nodded, hugging Hoseok's stomach tighter. 

Hyunwoo entered the room, carrying both Kihyun and Hoseok's food in hand. "Do you think you can get him to eat? He definitely needs to after today." Hyunwoo laughed lightly.

Hoseok nodded, leaning forward to take Kihyun's food from Hyunwoo. "Can you sit up for me baby?" 

As expected, Kihyun shook his head, clinging tighter to Hoseok. "Come on bean, you need to eat. Aren't you hungry?"

Once again, Kihyun shook his head. Hoseok had only one more option. "They're your favorite, though~," Hoseok sing-songed, cracking a smile at Kihyun beginning to shift in his arms. 

"Dino?" he asked quietly. The others had quickly recognized little Kihyun's love for food, especially when it was in fun shapes. After repeatedly reassuring Kihyun that it was okay to ask for food when he was hungry, he became more relaxed about eating. Then, one fateful day, Changkyun had cut Minhyuk and Kihyun's chicken nuggets into dinosaur shapes, and Hoseok had never seen Kihyun happier. He had looked absolutely astonished at first, gaping up at Changkyun in shock, before exclaiming an attempted pronunciation of "di'a'saur!" with the brightest smile they had ever seen on the boy.

So obviously, upon learning the the sandwich shop around the corner from their building would cut sandwiches into shapes for kids (or littles), Hoseok had planned to take Kihyun there the next time he was little, as a special treat. Granted, the day hadn't turned out as planned, but Hoseok would be damned if he didn't see Kihyun smile today.

Kihyun turned around in Hoseok's lap, the older still keeping his arms wrapped around the boy. Hyunwoo unwrapped the sandwich, handing half of it to Kihyun, who let out a small giggle. Kihyun held up the sandwich for Hoseok to see, "Daddy, it's a dino!" he said excitedly, finally beginning to brighten up. Hoseok's heart fluttered.

Kihyun bit into the sandwich happily, slumping back against Hoseok's chest. Hyunwoo smiled at the two fondly, passing Hoseok his food so he could eat as well. 

After dinner, while Jooheon and Minhyuk chased each other around the dorm, laughter being heard all around, Kihyun was still curled up with Hoseok on the couch. Hoseok had turned on an animated film, and he could tell Kihyun was trying to pay attention, but his eyes kept fluttering closed. Hoseok watched with a fond smile as Kihyun repeatedly tried to startle himself awake in order to keep watching the movie. Eventually however, his tiredness won over and, hands twisted in Hoseok's t shirt, he drifted off to sleep. 

For a while, Hoseok just laid there, watching Kihyun sleep. He selfishly wished that he could hold Kihyun like this when he was out of his headspace, but he quickly pushed away the thought. That's the last thing Kihyun needs right now, he kept reminding himself. After all he's been through, he probably doesn't even want to  _think_ about a relationship. Hoseok sighed.

Right before Hoseok fell asleep on the couch, arms wrapped protectively around Kihyun, he made a promise to the boy that he would make tomorrow a fun day. There would be no tears, so far as Hoseok could help it. Hoseok would do whatever it took to keep Kihyun happy, if only for a day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone has any ideas for some fluffy stuff they would like to see, please leave a comment! I would love to hear your input.
> 
> ALSO: I need your help! A few people have asked for a romantic pairing (outside of headspace) to be added to this story. So far, I am considering Kihyun and Hoseok, but if you would like to see Kihyun paired with someone else, let me know! I am also open to adding other relationships (not involving Kihyun) if anyone wants to see that!
> 
> Here are the upcoming prompts to look forward to! (in no particular order)
> 
> 1\. Little Jooheon jealous about all of the attention little Kihyun is getting.  
> 2\. Kihyun sees/hears one of the other littles getting in trouble, leading him to have to confront his fear of punishment.  
> 3\. One of the littles slip during a performance or fan sign.
> 
> And here are some new ideas! (vote on which you like!)
> 
> 4\. Hyungwon in little space (part 2)  
> 5\. Kihyun dealing with romantic feelings (outside of headspace) towards character of choice (I'm personally leaning towards Hoseok!)  
> 6\. Little space play date (just a bunch of fluff most likely) (possibly involving little Hyungwon? ;) ) 
> 
> As always, if you have any requests, leave a comment!


	6. Little Hyungwon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meet Little Hyungwon! :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we have one of my most requested prompts! Get ready for very, very mild angst but lots of fluff!

Hyungwon was bored.

And when Hyungwon got bored, he tended to think. Which was sometimes a good thing, and sometimes not. The times during which it wasn't a good thing included today, as Hyungwon couldn't stop thinking about the  _one_ thing he didn't want to be thinking about.

But that's usually how it works, isn't it?

Ever since Hyunwoo had talked about the possibility of Hyungwon entering little space, and had offered to take care of him if he ever needed him to, Hyungwon couldn't get the idea out of his head. He was  _curious_ , to say the least. He had always admired how the littles were looked after by their caregivers. All of the attention they received - it must be nice, right?

Hyungwon kind of wanted that.

But try as he might, he just could  _not_ get into little space. This made sense, as Hyungwon was a neutral - he wasn't supposed to even  _want_ to be little. Hyungwon was frustrated. He had gotten into little space one time already, albeit years ago, why was this any different? 

Hyungwon knew why. It was because he actually  _wanted it._

The first, and only time he had ever entered little space had been during his school years. He had had a terrible day, hadn't done as well as he wanted to on one of his finals, and had twisted his ankle on the walk home from school. The perfect storm.

The most common way that a little (or in Hyungwon's case, a neutral capable of entering little space) is thrown unwillingly into a headspace is if they are dealing with emotional strain, or  intense pain. Hyungwon had checked both of those boxes, so it hadn't been hard for him to let that prickling sensation at the back of his head take over.

But now that Hyungwon was intentionally trying to enter little space, both without emotional _and_ physical pain, he just couldn't get there. And he didn't really feel like putting himself through some emotional trauma or purposefully twisting his ankle. It just wasn't logical.

Hyungwon sighed, flipping over on the couch with a huff. Changkyun, who was currently the only other one in the living room, quirked an eyebrow. 

"You okay, hyung?" he asked. Hyungwon let out a sound that somewhat resembled an affirmation.

"You look like you're struggling with something," Changkyun began slowly, "Could I help?" Hyungwon's face started burning.  _Of course_ Hyunwoo had told him about his headspace.  _Goddammit, Hyunwoo._

"Oh my god,  _he told you?"_ Hyungwon accused, unable to keep the betrayal out of his voice. 

"It's not a big deal, hyung. We just wanna help-"

"Not a big deal?!" Hyungwon asked angrily, sitting up suddenly. He had no idea why he was getting so upset, he honestly didn't mind that Hyunwoo had told Changkyun. He was just embarrassed, and to be honest, a little hurt. He took a breath, running a hand over his face to try to calm himself. "Who else knows?" 

Hyungwon didn't know if he wanted Changkyun to answer or not. "Just me." Changkyun fibbed. A little white lie wouldn't hurt.

Hyungwon groaned, flopping back down into his laying position on the couch. 

"Is it something that you want? To be little?" Changkyun asked hesitantly.

Hyungwon huffed. "It doesn't matter if I want it or not. I'm not supposed to have a headspace. I can't get back into it anyways." After a moment of consideration, he quietly added, "I've been trying." 

Changkyun opened his mouth to respond, but was cut off by the front door of the dorm opening. The others had been out grabbing supplies for dinner. Hyungwon took his escape while he could, moving to get up from the couch. He headed down the hall to his room, curling up on his bed.

Hyungwon didn't understand why this was bothering him so much. He hadn't even considered being little that often before these last few weeks, except in brief moments of passing. It just seemed like now that it was out in the open and Hyunwoo knew about it (along with Changkyun and most likely Hoseok,  _thanks Hyunwoo)_ , that Hyungwon could't stop thinking about how  _nice_ it would be. Last time he had been little, he was by himself. Being little by oneself is neither fun, nor safe. But now, he had three people that would be willing to look after him, and he had witnessed first hand the effect finally giving into little space had had on Kihyun. He was much happier and easy-going now, and loads more comfortable around everyone.

But still, Hyungwon had his doubts. If he were to be little, the littles in the house would outnumber caregivers, 4:3. So he could never allow himself to even  _consider_ being little when the other three were already. He would feel way too guilty if one of them got hurt, or if one (or all) of the caregivers needed a break. And after all, giving the caregivers a break was Hyungwon's  _job_ in the group. It was his self-given responsibility, as their neutral. 

Hyungwon stood from the bed, deciding to just do everything in his power to forget about being little. It would make everything too complicated, anyways. The last thing Hyunwon wanted was to put any more stress on his bandmates.

~~~

Hyunwoo was worried about Hyungwon.

Hyungwon couldn't sit still at the dinner table, and Hyunwoo was  _definitely_ aware of the fact that Hyungwon hadn't so much as glanced at him once.

Hyunwoo felt guilty. He knew he shouldn't have told anyone about Hyungwon's one-time-trip into little space, but he was just so concerned. He had tried speaking in general terms when he had asked Changkyun and Hoseok about it, but they had caught on quickly.

"Hey guys," Hyunwoo asked. Changkyun and Hoseok were both in his room. The three were spending some quality time together, as no one was little that day.

"Yeah?" Hoseok asked. Changkyun put down his book to pay attention.

"Have you two ever heard of a neutral going into little space?" Hyunwoo asked. Dead silence followed.

"I haven't, but I'm sure it's possible, given the right circumstances. Why do you ask, Hyung?" Changkyun said.

"That's what I thought too. I've done some research online, but apparently it's really rare." Hyunwoo huffed out, leaning back in his chair.

Hoseok, who still hadn't said anything, suddenly leaned forward, eyes wide, "Oh my god,  _Hyungwon?"_ he asked, in shock.

Before Hyunwoo could deny it, Changkyun let out a breath. "That makes so much sense." 

Hyunwoo was shocked. "What?" he asked Changkyun.

"Think about it, hyung. He's always been insecure about his status. I don't think being a neutral has ever sat right with him. He's always super nervous about being left alone with Jooheon and Minhyuk, when almost every other neutral I've talked to isn't. I honestly think Hyungwon has more characteristics of a little, than of a neutral." Changkyun voiced.

Hoseok leaned back, lost in thought. "That does make sense. I've always thought it was strange how nervous he gets about being left alone with the littles. I just thought it was part of his personality, but like Changkyun said, I've never talked to a neutral who isn't  _over_ confident about their ability to take care of littles."

Hyunwoo hadn't  _meant_ to betray Hyungwon's trust, but he was kind of glad he had. Changkyun and Hoseok had opened his eyes to another perspective about Hyungwon he hadn't even considered. It had given Hyunwoo a lot to think about.

Hyunwoo knew Hyungwon would be upset with him, but he hadn't expected it to be  _this_ extreme. Hyungwon still hadn't looked at him once, and it had been more than an hour since the group had dinner. 

Hyungwon had retreated back into his bedroom a few minutes after he had finished the dishes, and Hyunwoo took that as the perfect opportunity to strike. He knocked before entering, walking into the room and shutting the door. He heard Hyungwon sigh.

"Yeah?" he asked, eyes still trained on his phone. He was sat on his bunk, so Hyunwoo moved to sit on the one opposite him.

"I'm sorry I told Changkyun," Hyunwoo opened.

After a pause, Hyungwon turned off his phone and sat up to face Hyunwoo. "I'm not even mad. Just embarrassed." 

"Why would you be embarrassed, Hyungwon?" Hyunwoo asked, genuinely confused.

"Because I'm a  _neutral._ You're supposed to worry about this stuff with  _littles_ , not with me!" Hyungwon said frustratedly. As if on cue, the door to the bedroom opened and Hyungwon made to get up to make an escape, but the door was shut abruptly. 

"Nuh-uh, we're not done here," Hoseok said, barricading Hyungwon's exit. Hyungwon's eyes widened, that familiar burn of betrayal sinking uncomfortably into his stomach. So Hoseok knew, too. He turned around to glare at Hyunwoo once again.

"Is  _nothing_ sacred?!" he fumed. Hoseok had to resist the urge to laugh.

Hyungwon made to open the door again, but Hoseok grabbed him, turning him around and steering him back towards the bed, where the two sat down. Hyungwon crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at his lap.

"If it makes you feel better, he didn't outright tell us," Hoseok began, "He asked Changkyun and I some questions because he was really worried about you, and we filled in the rest ourselves." 

Hyungwon felt a tiny bit bad. He uncrossed his arms, but still wasn't feeling brave enough to look up at either of the two.

Hyungwon felt intimidated. Sure, he had been alone in a room before with Hoseok and Hyunwoo, but never like this. He had never had their full, undivided attention before. It was making his head swim.

It had never been like  _this._ With both Hoseok and Hyunwoo's caregiver sides being directed at  _him._

The two caregivers picked up on this, and were suddenly aware of what they needed to do. They locked eyes and nodded, silently communicating with each other.

"Baby," Hyunwoo tested. Hyungwon flinched violently, uttering a panicked 'nope!' before jumping up from the bed and making for the door once again.

A firm grip on his arm stopped him, spinning him around and pushing him up against the wall. "Hey, it's okay, it's just us," Hyunwoo tried. Hyungwon, however, wouldn't stop struggling to get out of Hyunwoo's grasp.

After a moment of hesitation, Hyunwoo made up his mind. It was worth a shot.

" _Hyungwon."_ Hyunwoo said firmly, in the tone he only used when one of the littles was in trouble, or he  _needed_ one of them to listen.

The effect was instantaneous. Hyungwon stilled, freezing under Hyunwoo's gaze, unable to meet his eyes.

Hyunwoo's tone had made him feel two feet tall.

His tone had made him feel...

Little.

Hyungwon's lower lip wobbled. He was in trouble. He had made Hyunwoo mad.

"Oh honey, you're okay," Hyunwoo said, leading Hyungwon back to the bed once again. The now-little sat down, bringing his knees to his chest and hiding behind them. Hyunwoo glanced at Hoseok worriedly, scared that he had made the wrong decision. He had known that using that voice on Hyungwon could cause him to enter little space, but he had also known that Hyungwon would think he was in trouble because of it.

"You're not in trouble, Hyungwonnie," Hoseok reassured, moving to comfort the little. Hyungwon peeked up from his knees, and this time, Hoseok didn't bother to hold back his emotions. He smiled warmly at Hyungwon. "Aww, stop being so cute!" 

Hoseok poked Hyungwon's side, earning both Hyunwoo and Hoseok the music to their ears that was little Hyungwon laughing. Hoseok continued to tickle the boy until all of his prior nervousness was gone.

"A-appa!" Hyungwon choked out between fits of laughter, happy tears streaming down his face. "Help!"

Hyunwoo happily obliged, leaning down to scoop Hyungwon up from the bed, much to Hoseok's dismay. Hyunwoo stood Hyungwon up, taking his hand and darting out of the room with him.

Hyungwon let out an excited giggle when he noticed that Hoseok had begun to chase them, "Appa, Daddy gon' catch!" Hyungwon squealed. 

"Not when you're in the no tickle-monster zone!" Changkyun shouted from the living room, and Hyunwoo let out a loud laugh. Of course Changkyun knew what they were up to.

The two darted into the living room, Hyungwon letting go of Hyunwoo's hand in order to dive onto the couch and into Changkyun's lap. Changkyun let out a surprised 'oompf' when Hyungwon collided into his chest.

Hyungwon watched, eyes filled with laughter, as Hoseok stopped at the edge of the living room, pretending as though there was an invisible wall that prevented him from entering.

"Oh no!" Hoseok wailed, "Wonnie has defeated me!" he cried, suddenly collapsing onto the floor. Changkyun let out a laugh at Hoseok's flawless acting.

"What on  _earth_ is going on in here?" Jooheon asked, entering the room. As far as Jooheon knew, both Minhyuk and Kihyun were currently out of their headspaces, and very much asleep, so why was Hoseok laying on the floor in his infamous 'tickle-monster-has-been-defeated' improvisation?

Upon seeing Changkyun on the couch, and a still laughing Hyungwon in his lap, Jooheon's eyes widened, a huge smile gracing his features. "Oh  _no way!"_ Jooheon said excitedly. But then he turned, a look of mock irritation directed at the caregivers, "Why did no one tell me?!" 

"It literally just happened," Hoseok laughed, still on the floor.

Hyungwon was finally aware that Jooheon was in the room, and upon seeing him, his face lit up. "Nee!" he said excitedly, jumping up from Changkyun's lap and barreling into Jooheon. 

Jooheon laughed at Hyungwon's choice of a nickname for him, "Wonnie!" he said back. And just like that, Jooheon flipped the switch and now two littles were in a cuddle-pile on the living room floor.

The two hit it off right away, practically inseparable from the first moment they met. Hoseok was sure that if Minhyuk and Kihyun weren't both already sleeping, that they would all be having a great time together. 

"You do realize what this means, right?" Hoseok asked, finally standing up. 

"Hm?" Hyunwoo asked. 

"We have  _four,"_ Hoseok laughed in disbelief. How Changkyun, Hoseok, and Hyunwoo were going to take care of  _four littles_ was completely unknown to them, but they were more than willing to try.

"Hyungwon is going to be difficult, though," Changkyun said, worriedly nibbling on his lip, "And how are we going to tell when he needs to be little? Or if its just a one time thing?" 

"No idea," Hyunwoo said, slinging an arm around the younger. "But we'll figure it out. We're going to take care of him, that's all that matters."

~~~

An hour or so passed, Jooheon and Hyungown now playing on the floor with Jooheon's favorite - toy cars.

Hyungwon was thrilled. Jooheon showed him one of his Transformer car toys that could be switched into different cars, and the look of amusement and fascination that lit up his face sent Jooheon into a fit of giggles.

"Alright boys," Hoseok braced himself, "Time for bed!" 

To his surprise, only Jooheon resisted, whining that he wasn't tired, which Hoseok was sure the kid would do even if he hadn't slept in days. Hyungwon only nodded, standing up and reaching for Hoseok's hand. Hoseok lead the boys into their bedroom, where Hyunwoo and Changkyun were already waiting. Once they were changed into pajamas, and both boys tucked into bed and given their goodnight kiss, Hoseok flipped off the bedroom light. Hyungwon was already fast asleep by the time Hoseok shut the door.

Back in the kitchen, the three caregivers gathered together, small smiles on each of their faces. Today had been a good day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed! 
> 
> Here are the upcoming prompts to look forward to! (in no particular order, but #2 will probably be next, as it has been the most requested after little Hyungwon~!)
> 
> 1\. Little Jooheon jealous about all of the attention little Kihyun has been getting.  
> 2\. Kihyun sees/hears one of the other littles getting in trouble, leading him to have to confront his fear of punishment.  
> 3\. One of the littles slip during a performance or fan sign.  
> 4\. Kihyun dealing with romantic feelings (outside of headspace) towards character of choice (I'm personally leaning towards Hoseok!)  
> 5\. Little space play date (just a bunch of fluff most likely) (possibly involving little Hyungwon? ;) )
> 
> As always, if you have any requests, leave a comment!


	7. Punishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt 2. Kihyun sees/hears one of the other littles getting in trouble, leading him to have to confront his fear of punishment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here is another very requested prompt! 
> 
> WARNING: this chapter contains punishment (spanking) as well as mentions of Kihyun's former mistreatment. Ends on a happy note, however!

It had been about a week since Hyungwon had dropped into little space for the first time, and since then, everything had been fairly normal.

Well,  _almost._

After waking up the day after being little in front of the majority of his bandmates (Kihyun and Minhyuk were  _beyond_ furious at the others not waking them up when Hyungwon had been little) Hyungwon had been  _very_ embarrassed. It had taken days of reassurance by the caregivers to calm Hyungwon down to the point that he was able to actually relax around them again. He hadn't been little since.

Kihyun, Jooheon, and Minhyuk, on the other hand, definitely had. This was normal for Minhyuk and Jooheon, as all of the members were used to taking care of them after long, stressful days of practice, shows, and fansigns. All of the members, the caregivers especially, had been amazed at Kihyun's relaxation about going into little space. 

That was, until today.

Kihyun and his self-proclaimed 'best older brother ever', Minhyuk, were playing together in the living room. Changkyun was trying his best not to move on the couch, as Jooheon had  _finally_ settled down for a nap. Even though it was on top of him. Changkyun sighed. You win some and you lose some.

Minhyuk, who had noticed that Kihyun was becoming bored, racked his brain for something else that was fun to do. But his 'best older brother' role was starting to become clouded by how tired he was. And when Minhyuk gets tired, he also gets cranky. Nap time exists for a reason.

Kihyun began rubbing his eyes. He was also getting tired. He had become accustomed to nap time, and had actually started to enjoy it, as it meant that he could usually puppy-eyes Hoseok into cuddling with him until he fell asleep.

"Min Min, I'm tiwed" Kihyun mumbled, making to grab Minhyuk's hand to pull him along to the bedroom for their nap. He had noticed Minhyuk yawning too.

"No, Ki!" Minhyuk said, slapping Kihyun's hand away. "Only babies take naps." 

Kihyun froze. Not only had Minhyuk  _hit_ him, (even though it was only a light slap, to Kihyun it felt like the older had punched him) he had called him a baby. Not in the nice way, like Hoseok, Changkyun, and Hyunwoo did, but in the _mean_ way. Like Sir used to.

Echoes of ' _Don't be such a baby, Kihyun.' ,_   _'Aww, does the poor baby not like that? Suck it up, and quit crying.' ,_ and  _'Only babies get punished. You don't want to be a baby, right?'_ filled Kihyun's mind, and suddenly he couldn't look at Minhyuk the same way. He was also having a hard time breathing.

" _Minhyuk."_ Changkyun said from his spot on the couch, moving Jooheon off of his chest. "Did I really just see you do that?" 

Changkyun walked over to the two littles, Kihyun keeping his eyes glued to the floor from where he had landed when Minhyuk had pulled his hand away from him. 

Minhyuk hadn't answered Changkyun, and Kihyun was getting anxious. One of his rules was always to give an answer, and Minhyuk was just sitting there. 

" _Minhyuk,"_ Kihyun flinched at Changkyun's tone. He had never heard him use it. He had never heard any of his caregivers use a tone like that, and it was scaring him. "Do you want to tell me what just happened?" 

Changkyun, who was completely focused on Minhyuk and thus unaware of Kihyun's inner turmoil, turned his full attention on Minhyuk, tucking a finger under his chin to tilt his head up. Minhyuk just shrugged, letting out an aggravated  _huff_ and rolling his eyes. 

Kihyun's eyes were watering. The last thing he wanted was for his older brother to be punished, let alone because of  _him._

"Alright," Changkyun said, standing up. "You have five seconds to get up and go into the bedroom. When I tell Hyunwoo to go meet you in there, you better be there, Minhyuk." 

In their group, it was typically Hyunwoo who handled discipline. Hoseok had tried a few times, but he had always felt too bad afterwards. It took a special kind of caregiver to be able to hold down a crying little to deliver a well-earned spanking, but Hyunwoo was always able to. Hyunwoo knew it was for the best for his littles. He understood the importance of discipline, and how littles actually  _needed_ it once in a while. Changkyun had never even attempted to punish the littles in any physical way, but he had absolutely no quarrels with sending one of them to the corner for a time out. 

This was the fist time Kihyun was seeing the precursor of a punishment since he had been little with his group. Kihyun had never acted out and was always incredibly sweet and quick to listen while in his headspace. Hyunwoo sometimes though Kihyun behaved  _too_ well, but knew that with time he would become more comfortable. 

Chankyun had left the room, most likely to go tell Hyunwoo that Minhyuk needed a 'firm hand', and Minhyuk still hadn't moved. Kihyun was shaking.

"Min Min," Kihyun whispered desperately, standing up in order to try once again to pull the older towards the bedroom. He didn't want things to get any worse, and Changkyun had  _ordered_ Minhyuk to go to the bedroom and he wasn't moving, and Kihyun knew how much worse punishments were when he tried to avoid them. 

"Stop it!" Minhyuk said, this time standing. Minhyuk was angry. Kihyun had never seen Minhyuk angry. The older placed his hands on Kihyun's chest, pushing him backwards. Kihyun, who was too caught off guard to react in time, was sent sprawling backwards onto the floor, landing on his wrist painfully. He was too stunned to cry.

" _Lee Minhyuk,"_ came a growl from the doorway. It was Minhyuk's turn to freeze. Luck certainly wasn't on his side today.

Minhyuk had gotten in trouble enough times to know when he was  _really_ in deep shit. He had learned the so-called, "levels of bad" (as he had titled), and right now he was operating at a solid 5. The highest level. 

A 1 was usually something small, like whining about nap time, or not wanting to eat right away. But a 5? A 5 was when he broke on of the most important rules - no hurting anyone. 

Jooheon had actually been the only one to ever break the "no hitting" policy. After receiving the punishment, he had never even considered doing it again.

Minhyuk's lip wobbled, and he started to curse himself. What had he been thinking! He never wanted to hurt anyone, let alone  _Kihyunnie,_ and he had hit the younger  _twice_ within the last five minutes. 

Minhyuk ducked his head. He was certainly in for it now. 

Hyunwoo, who was still astounded at what he had just seen, had required a few moments to calm himself down before he could act. Hyunwoo never punished the littles when he was angry. Never. So after seeing Minhyuk, his sweet boy, flat-out  _shove_ Kihyun to the ground? Yeah, he needed a few seconds to cool off.

After taking a beat, Hyunwoo sprung into action. "Go to your bedroom." 

This time, Minhyuk listened. He all but ran to his room. Hyunwoo followed. 

Kihyun was still on the floor, holding his wrist to his chest. It  _hurt_ , but Kihyun knew better than to cry. Only babies cry.

"Kihyunnie?" Jooheon asked, sitting up on the couch, now out of his headspace. He had woken up some time around Minhyuk yelling 'Stop it!', and had witnessed Kihyun's fall.

Down the hall, the sound of Minhyuk crying, and the tell-tale 's _mack'_ of a spank sounded out, and Kihyun lost it. 

Tears prickled in his eyes, and he scooted back until he was under the coffee table. Minhyuk began to cry louder. Kihyun covered his ears to block out the sound, now crying himself.

"Kihyunnie?!" Jooheon asked again, jumping off the couch to look under the coffee table. 

"Shit," Jooheon said, "Hyungs!" he yelled, figuring someone would be around to hear him. 

Hoseok rounded the corner, coat and gym bag still in hand as he had just gotten home, eyes widening at the scene. He immediately rushed to Kihyun. "What happened?" he asked, turning to Jooheon.

"Minhyuk hit him," Jooheon began, and upon registering Hoseok's expression, quickly added, "Hyunwoo's handling it. But I think Kihyun got hurt when he fell." 

Hoseok peeked under the table, eyeing Kihyun worriedly. He didn't notice any physical injury from what he could see of the boy, but why was Kihyun covering his ears?

"Baby?" Hoseok asked, and Kihyun's eyes shot open at the same time as he flinched violently at the choice of nickname. Hoseok was confused, and his concern was quickly rising.

"Kihyunnie, can you come out of there for me?" Hoseok asked, hoping that the younger's eagerness to listen would actually help in this situation. Kihyun, still crying, uncovered his ears and moved to scoot out from under the table, when the sound of yet another loud  _'smack'_ rang out from the bedroom. 

Kihyun let out another sob, moving right back under the table and covering his ears once again.

Hoseok suddenly understood.

"Jooheon, I need you to go tell Hyunwoo to stop." Hoseok said, and Jooheon immediately leapt up to inform Hyunwoo. 

Kihyun, who was still under the table, was torn. Since he had never seen one of the littles act out, he had also never seen any of his caregivers get angry, or use a strict tone. But today, he had seen not just one but  _two_ get upset, and now he was associating that frustration he had seen on Changkyun, and the anger he had seen on Hyunwoo with his old caregiver. Big Kihyun logically knew that discipling for bad behavior was very important in a caregiver-little relationship, and that it was nothing like the abuse that he had went through, but little Kihyun had yet to learn the difference.

But when he looked into the eyes of Hoseok, the caregiver he had come to trust and love the most, he desperately didn't want to associate any of those horrible things with the man in front of him.

But hadn't he felt the same about Changkyun and Hyunwoo? Could't Hoseok act the same way? Couldn't Hoseok be lying to him to get him to come out from under the table, just so that he could punish him?

Kihyun started to cry harder. He didn't want Hoseok to be bad. Hoseok couldn't be bad! Kihyun felt two strong arms reach under the table, pulling him out and holding him against his chest. 

"Oh, Kihyunnie," Hoseok mumbled, rocking the crying boy back and forth, "You must be so confused, I'm so sorry, baby," Hoseok continued to rock the little until he had calmed down slightly.

"Can you look at me, baby?" Hoseok mumbled, still rubbing soothing circles onto Kihyun's back. Kihyun reluctantly pulled his head back from Hoseok's chest, shyly meeting his eyes.

"Punishment isn't bad, sweetheart," Hoseok said, "At least not in the way you're used to," he added, upon feeling Kihyun flinch. "Minhyuk is being punished because he hit you, and he knows that's against the rules. But just because Appa is punishing Min, it doesn't mean he loves him any less. Minhyuk needed to learn that hitting you wasn't okay, that's all. All of us love each other no matter what,"

"Even if bad?" Kihyun asked, face burrowed back into Hoseok's chest. 

"Baby, nothing you could do would ever make us stop loving you," Hoseok said.

"But Appa hurt Min Min. Only do when hate?" Kihyun asked, voice of his former caregiver ringing in his ears once more,  _'I'm doing this because you've made me hate you, Kihyun. If you would just behave, maybe I could love you again,'_

"Oh, baby, no," Hoseok said, anger bubbling in his chest due to Kihyun's past caregiver once again, "Appa doesn't hate Min, baby. Appa loves Minhyuk very much. Minhyuk broke a very important rule by hurting you, and he knows the consequences,"

"Appa hurt me?" Kihyun asked, but suddenly a worse thought occurred to him, " _Daddy_ hurt me?" Kihyun pushed away from Hoseok's chest, blurry eyes meeting Hoseok's.

Hoseok didn't know what to do. His heart was currently in pieces. "No, never," Hoseok choked out, pulling Kihyun tight against him, "Never, ever. Baby, I would never hurt you,"

Kihyun seemed to ponder Hoseok's words for a moment, before uttering, "Pwomise?"

"Yes, baby, I promise."

~~~

Hosoek continued to explain the concept of punishment to Kihyun for nearly an hour. He would gently shoot down Kihyun's former caregiver's conditioning each time he had the opportunity. Kihyun had finally begun to relax, and Hoseok had the feeling that Kihyun was finally beginning to understand. Hoseok had taken time to explain, as simply as he could manage so that Kihyun would still understand, that Hyunwoo still loved Minhyuk, even if he had been 'bad', and that punishment was nothing like Kihyun thought it was. Sure, it was unpleasant, as any little could attest, but when Hoseok mentioned the aftercare that little's receive after a punishment, he knew he really _shouldn't_ have been surprised that Kihyun had absolutely no idea what that meant, even though it made his heart hurt. 

Hoseok had then explained that after a punishment, a little is always closely looked after, and given lots of cuddles and love. Kihyun had been incredibly confused at this, but Hoseok had been more than patient in his explanation. 

By the end of their conversation, Kihyun felt much better. His Daddy had taught him a lot, and now he wasn't as scared anymore. 

Kihyun yawned suddenly, making Hoseok laugh. "Nap time, Daddy?" Kihyun asked as excitedly as he could manage, given how tired he had become after his emotional rollercoaster.

Hoseok had never met a little who was  _excited_ about nap time, but of course his Kihyunnie would be the exception.

"You got it, my little bean," Hoseok smiled, lifting Kihyun up into his arms and taking them both down the hall. 

Once settled into bed, Kihyun sleepily reached his arm out to Hoseok, who was already moving to climb into bed with him. Hoseok pulled Kihyun close, "I love you, Kihyunnie," he said, pressing a soft kiss to his temple.

"Love you too, Daddy," Kihyun mumbled, voice full of sleep. He scooted closer to Hoseok, hand tightening in his shirt before finally falling asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed. :) 
> 
> Here are the upcoming prompts to look forward to! (In no particular order!)
> 
> 1\. Little Jooheon jealous about all of the attention little Kihyun has been getting.  
> 2\. One of the littles slip during a performance or fan sign.  
> 3\. Kihyun dealing with romantic feelings (outside of headspace) towards character of choice (I'm personally leaning towards Hoseok!)  
> 4\. Little space play date (just a bunch of fluff most likely) (possibly involving little Hyungwon? ;) )  
> 5\. Family outing to the zoo
> 
> As always, if you have any requests, leave a comment!


	8. Love?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 3\. Kihyun dealing with romantic feelings (outside of headspace) towards character of choice (I'm personally leaning towards Hoseok!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Sorry about the wait for this update!

Two weeks had passed since the incident with Minhyuk being punished by Hyunwoo. Kihyun had not been little since.

Waking up the morning after, wrapped up in Hoseok's arms, had been simultaneously the best and the worst way to wake up. Kihyun desperately wanted to burrow right back into Hoseok's chest, but he knew he couldn't. Hoseok was only cuddly with him when he was in little space, it would be weird if Hoseok woke up with Kihyun on his chest while in his adult headspace.

Kihyun sighed, untangling himself from the blankets and moving out into the hallway. His little side had been way too clingy with Hoseok lately, and this was incredibly embarrassing to Kihyun. As it is common for feelings a person has for someone to generalize into their younger headspace, it made perfect since to Kihyun why he was so dependent on Hoseok while he was little.

It was because he loved him. 

Kihyun had loved Hoseok for years. Since around the time he had first met him, and things had just been getting worse ever since. But fortunately, between his desperate attempts to conceal his little side and keep up his strong, independent persona, he had easily been able to hide literally  _everything_ from Hoseok. 

But now that his defenses had all come down, Kihyun was scared of what else could come to the surface. If he was letting his affection for Hoseok show while he was little, what could he accidentally let slip while he was big? What could his  _little_ self let slip?

So naturally, Kihyun dealt with the situation in the only way he knew how. He stuffed everything down and away in a dark corner, and was trying his hardest to not enter little space unless it was a dire circumstance. It was bad enough that the rest of his group knew about his former abuser, but they had also  _met_ him - they had all been face-to-face with the person that had ruined Kihyun. 

Kihyun was most bothered by the fact that  _Hoseok_ knew. Hoseok had seen him. Hoseok had seen the man that used to hold Kihyun down and have his way with him, little or not. Hoseok now knew just exactly  _how_ damaged he was, and why would he want someone so broken, so  _used_ , as Kihyun?

These were the thoughts that kept Kihyun up at night. 

\---

Ever since Minhyuk had pushed Kihyun and had been subsequently punished by Hyunwoo (even though the punishment had been prematurely cut off by Jooheon barging in, yelling at Hyunwoo to stop) Kihyun had refused going into little space. He had never outright  _said_ that that was what he was doing, but the lame excuses and claims of extra vocal or dance lessons were a painful reminder of how Kihyun had acted before he had been little with them for the first time. 

Hyunwoo had blamed himself at first. He had felt so guilty for not even thinking about how punishing Minhyuk within ear-shot of Kihyun could have affected him. In their dorm, it was hard to have privacy anywhere, but Hyunwoo knew that was no excuse. He knew he should have been paying closer attention to Kihyun's behavior.

It was Minhyuk though, out of all of them, that felt the absolute worst. Minhyuk had continued to beat himself up after, despite Hyunwoo finishing his punishment (after Kihyun had been put to bed) and giving aftercare. The punishment itself is usually enough to prevent a little from continuing to feel guilty afterwards, but Kihyun hadn't been little since, so Minhyuk hadn't been able to properly apologize. 

The guilt had made Minhyuk feel so sick that he forced himself out of his headspace, and hadn't been back into it since. He was currently on a record of five days without being little, when he was usually little for at least an hour or so per day, if their schedules allowed.

Needless to say, Changkyun, Hoseok, and Hyunwoo were trying to not lose their shit. No matter what the three caregivers had tried, Kihyun had dodged their attempts at getting him into his headspace, and Minhyuk had kept refusing being little due to how sick it made him feel. 

Hyunwoo ran a hand sharply through his hair, sighing in his seat at the kitchen table. How had one bad situation led to an outcome this horrible? Minhyuk had bags under his eyes due to being unable to sleep alone (which he always insisted on doing when he was big, unless it was Hyunwoo asking) and Kihyun had just left the dorm several hours early, due to "dance lessons".

Hyungwon rounded the corner, and upon seeing Hyunwoo in his current state, let out an aggravated huff _._ He marched over to Hyunwoo, yanking the older out of his seat and dragging him out into the living room. He forced Hyunwoo down on the couch, let out a sharp, "stay," before heading off in the direction of the bedrooms. When he returned, he was pulling Changkyun, Jooheon, Minhyuk, and Hoseok with him. 

"Alright, it's time for an intervention," Hyungwon said, standing in the middle of the rest of the group, who were all seated. "This is getting ridiculous. Kihyun isn't sleeping or eating because he's too busy trying to avoid everyone, Minhyuk hasn't slept in four days, and our three caregivers are all moping around and feeling sorry for themselves. Can you all just sort your shit out, please? The tension is  _killing_ me," Hyungwon finished, flopping down onto the sofa next to Jooheon.

"Hyunwgon's right," Hoseok muttered, "We really aren't handling this well." Hyungwon threw his arms up in  a 'thank you!' motion.

"Minhyuk," Hyunwoo said, turning to the younger, "Sweetheart, you really need to let yourself be little," Hyunwoo practically begged.

"Hyung, you know I  _want_ to," Minhyuk began, "But it literally feels like I'm going to throw up every time I try to. Its not going to go away until Kihyun's little, too." 

"Okay, then we talk to Kihyun," at Jooheon's scoff, Hoseok was quick to add, "He's gotta listen to us eventually. I thought that I did a good enough job of explaining punishment to him when he was little so that he wouldn't react like this. I guess I didn't." Hoseok looked away guiltily.

"I don't think it's that, Hyung. Kihyun was fine after you explained everything to him, and he let you sleep with him didn't he?" Hoseok nodded, so Jooheon continued, "No, I don't think it's because of what happened with Minhyuk." 

"Right then," Hyungwon said, standing again, "One of you talk to him. I don't care who. I want to see that boy little by the end of today or I swear to God I'm going to have an aneurysm."

Hyunwoo crooked an amused eyebrow at Hyungwon's behavior, turning to the others after he had left the room. 

"Is he a neutral, or an overbearing mother?" Hyunwoo laughed, the others chiming in.

\---

After an exhausting day of practice, the seven members all entered the dorm, letting out a collective, exhausted sigh as the door closed behind them.

Kihyun bent to take off his shoes, stalling. His plan was to wait for the others to disperse into the living room, then he would make a break for the bathroom, shower, and hopefully dive into bed without any further confrontation.

The thought was short-lived. 

A few of the members headed off into the living room or kitchen, but Hyunwoo, Hoseok, and Changkyun stayed behind, eyeing Kihyun, who was still messing with his shoelaces. Hoseok looked at the other two, mouthed an 'I've got this', then turned to crouch in front of Kihyun. 

"Hey," Hoseok began softly. Kihyun's hands had stilled on his shoelaces.

"Hey," Kihyun muttered back after a pause.

"Can we talk?" Hoseok asked, following Kihyun as he stood.

Kihyun shifted uncomfortably, becoming slightly irritated. He was exhausted, and he just wanted to be left alone. He didn't want to be talking to the person who was responsible for exactly just how tired he was. "About what? I'm really tired, Hyung."

"About that, actually. I know you're not sleeping well. You haven't let yourself be little in  _weeks,_ Kihyun. I'm-we, are all worried about you."

Kihyun huffed. He was so _not_ in the mood to deal with this right now. He was nowhere near his headspace, but he lacked control over his emotions because of how tired and drained he was. It was a recipe for disaster. 

"If you would let me past you and into the bedroom, maybe I could get some sleep," Kihyun snapped. He knew he was being unfair - flat-out mean, even, but Hoseok was looking at him with  _that_ look, the one he used most often when Kihyun was little, where he would look at him with such care, and Kihyun just couldn't do it. He was five seconds away from some completely over-dramatic reaction, and whether it was shoving past Hosoek forcefully, or grabbing the older by the collar and kissing the shit out of him, was yet to be determined.

"You sleep better with me," Hoseok said, before he could stop himself. It took the wind right out of Kihyun's sails.

Kihyun shoved past Hoseok and headed directly for his bedroom, blinking back tears. Had he really been so obvious? He could still play it off as being so clingy with Hoseok because his little side trusted him, right? Hoseok surely couldn't think it meant more than that?

He should have figured that Hosoek would follow him. The older entered the bedroom, shutting the door behind him. 

"Hoseok, seriously, I don't want to do this right now. I just want to sleep." Kihyun was trying so hard to keep the hint of desperation out of his voice.

"Was it how I handled explaining punishment?" Hoseok couldn't stop himself from asking. Kihyun turned around abruptly, eyes wide. Surely Hoseok hadn't been blaming  _himself_ this entire time?

"W-what? No, of course not!" Kihyun stammered, baffled. He supposed it did make sense, as Kihyun had started acting strangely right after that had happened, but Kihyun honestly hadn't thought that Hoseok would think that it was because of their conversation. 

"Then what is it, Ki?" Hoseok asked, crossing the room to be closer to Kihyun. Hoseok was tearing himself apart. All he wanted was to be able to be there for Kihyun, to protect him. And if he could only do that while the boy was little, he would take what he was given, even though it hurt him to not be able to comfort Kihyun while he was big, too. But now Kihyun was hurting himself by not letting himself be little, and Hoseok couldn't take watching Kihyun hurt. Hoseok knew he was probably overstepping some boundaries, but he was too caught up in his emotions to care.

Kihyun turned back to his bed, eyes burning once again. He wanted to be anywhere else.

"Kihyun, please don't shut me out anymore," Hoseok begged, voice barely above a whisper. Kihyun moved to grab his pajamas, but a hand on top of his froze him in place. 

Kihyun blinked down at Hoseoks hand on top of his. Suddenly, the tears he had been holding back sprang forward, and the intense  _longing_ he had felt for Hoseok for nearly as long as he had known him took over.

Kihyun turned to the older, and before rationality could talk him out of it, his hands were reaching up to latch behind Hoseok's neck, and Kihyun was leaning in to kiss him. It was quick, and Kihyun would have been long gone if it weren't for Hoseoks arms reaching up to tighten around him, pulling his lips back to his. Hoseok could taste Kihyun's tears.

Kihyun pulled away, successfully freeing himself this time. "Y-you want to know why I'm resisting being little again?" Kihyun began, wiping at his eyes, "It's exactly like you said earlier. I sleep better with you. I let myself get way too comfortable with you when I'm little and I didn't want that to-to change anything between us when I'm not, because I've been trying for  _so long_ to keep this hidden from you, but I'm weak, Hoseok," Kihyun babbled out, tears flowing freely. "You make me so fucking weak," he trailed off.

"Oh,  _Kihyun,"_ Hoseok said brokenly, reaching out to pull the younger into his arms again. "Baby, why on earth didn't you tell me?" Hoseok asked, but he knew the answer. Especially after meeting Kihyun's former caregiver. "I feel the exact same way. You don't even know. But I couldn't bring myself to tell you because I was supposed to be your caregiver. And after failing at that for  _years,_ I was not about to test my luck after you were finally comfortable enough to be little around me."

A long silence filled the room, but it wasn't uncomfortable. Hoseok continued to hold Kihyun close, running a hand through his hair. It felt strange to Kihyun to be this close, this intimate with Hoseok. 

"But we can't do this." Kihyun said, pushing away. 

"Why not?" Hoseok asked. After finding out Kihyun reciprocated his feelings, he wasn't about to let the younger out of his grasp. No, not anymore.

"You- you don't," Kihyun started, but struggled to find the words. "I'm bad in little space, because of, you know," Kihyun made a gesture with his hands. "It's going to be so much worse with a relationship. Hyung, I can't put that on you, I can't." 

"But what if I want you to?" Hoseok asked. Kihyun looked up at him in confusion. "Wouldn't you do the same for me?"

Kihyun faltered. Hoseok had a point. And Kihyun was running out of excuses to  _not_ start kissing Hoseok again.

"But it was so bad, Hyung. I'm not a good boyfriend. I'm not going to be able to have sex, probably ever. And I can't ask you to be with me when I'm so messed up."

"Woah, stop right there." Hoseok said, "Absolutely not. You are not messed up.  _He_ is the only one who is messed up. I could care less whether or not we ever have sex. We don't even need to talk about that right now. I'm never going to push anything on you, ever." Hoseok said, trailing a hand down Kihyun's cheek. Kihyun leaned into the touch.

"Hey, look at me," Hoseok waited until Kihyun's eyes met his, "If this is something that you want, we will take it slow, I promise you. I've waited so long to hold you like this, I don't even care if we never kiss again. I just want to be there for you."

Kihyun laughed through his tears, "I want this," he said, leaning forward to press their foreheads together, "But I definitely don't want us to never kiss again." 

Hoseok smiled, leaning forward to kiss Kihyun. 

Even thought the conversation hadn't exactly gone the way Hoseok had expected, he couldn't think of a better outcome. And even though Hoseok knew he and Kihyun would have to have a long conversation about what the younger was and wasn't okay with, it was still a step in the right direction. He was holding the man he'd loved for  _years_ in his arms, was kissing him. 

Things couldn't have been better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Please let me know what you thought! In the upcoming chapter I will be tackling the tension between Hyunwoo and little Minhyuk and little Kihyun, so don't worry if you were concerned to see that going unresolved in this chapter. I just saw a good stopping point, and took it. :)
> 
> Here are the upcoming prompts to look forward to! (In no particular order!)
> 
> 1\. Little Jooheon jealous about all of the attention little Kihyun has been getting.  
> 2\. One of the littles slip during a performance or fan sign.  
> 3\. Little space play date (just a bunch of fluff most likely) (possibly involving little Hyungwon? ;) )  
> 4\. Family outing to the zoo
> 
> As always, if you have any requests, leave a comment!


	9. Slipping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More little Hyungwon <3 Also combined with my prompt #2 about slipping during a fan sign. :)

Hyungwon woke up feeling a bit... odd.

They had a day jam packed schedule wise, so all of the members had to be up bright and early. 

Hyungwon had felt weird right off the bat. It wasn't a bad feeling, necessarily. He just felt strange, and wasn't able to put his finger on the feeling until he stumbled out into the living room, where some toys that the groups' littles had been playing with the night before were still scattered across the floor.

Hyungwon gulped nervously.  _Fuck._

There was no way he could be little today. They just didn't have the time for it. Kihyun, Jooheon, and Minhyuk were all currently in their adult headspaces, although Jooheon had been  _very_ reluctant, and was still clinging to Changkyun despite not being little. 

Hyungwon bit his lip, still stood in the entryway to the living room, eyes locked on the toys. It would be so easy to just -

"Alright guys let's go! We're going to be late!" Hoseok yelled from the door, shooing the others out in front of him, until it was just Kihyun, Hoseok, and Hyungwon left. Hyungwon tore his eyes away from the toys, and gave Hoseok a shaky smile before ducking out of the dorm. 

Behind him, Hoseok and Kihyun walked together, so close that their arms were brushing. As they couldn't hold hands in public, this was the next best thing.

"Did you pick up on that?" Kihyun asked Hoseok, gaze trained on Hyungwon who was several feet in front of them.

"Yeah. I just hope he's going to be okay today. It's a really long day. I still don't understand how often he needs to be little, so it's hard to gauge if he's in danger of slipping or not." Hoseok answered.

Hyungwon hadn't been little in weeks, not since his first drop with the group. As he was a neutral, the classification that typically did not need to assume a little or caretaker role, Hyungwon didn't need to be little anywhere near as often as Kihyun, Jooheon, or Minhyuk did. It was also difficult for the caregivers to attempt to talk Hyungwon down if he was feeling stressed. They had tried multiple times, but to no avail. Hyungwon tried not to let this get to him, or to let his negative thoughts about being a neutral take over. Hyungwon was supposed to be the backbone of the group, he wasn't supposed to have characteristics of a little, let alone be able to enter little space. Hyungwon was an abnormality, and even though all of his group had repeatedly assured him that they didn't mind taking care of him, Hyungwon still felt as though he was failing their group dynamic.

Their day began with a short dance practice, followed by a performance, interview, and finally, a fan sign. Hyungwon managed to hold it together until they reached the fan sign.

Throughout the day, the others had begun to pick up on Hyungwon's strange behavior. He was being more reserved than usual, and was quiet during their performance and interview. On top of that, he seemed nervous. 

Kihyun had been watching him closely since he and Hoseok had talked that morning. Hyungwon was going to extreme lengths to keep himself reeled in, and Kihyun knew that look anywhere. So, when the group was given a short break between their interview and fan sign, Kihyun managed to snag Hyungwon and drag him in to the bathroom behind him.

Hyungwon kept his eyes trained on the floor, shifting his weight from foot to foot anxiously. "I know what you're going to say," he said to Kihyun.

Kihyun sighed, tilting his head to the side and staring up at Hyungwon fondly. "Are you going to be okay during the fan sign? That's all that's left before we get to go home, and you can finally drop." 

Hyungwon flinched at the word 'drop'. "I don't need to do, um, that. I just need to sleep it off." 

"Are you kidding me? You'll be lucky if you make it five steps into the dorm before Hyunwoo tries to talk you down. He's been worried about you all day. So have Hoseok and Changkyun."

Hyungwon wrang his hands together. Cuddling with Hyunwoo certainly  _did_ sound nice, now that he thought of it. 

"I don't know if I'm going to make it," Hyungwon admitted after a brief silence. "I'm like, right on the edge, it feels like. And fans always give stuffed animals, and I  _love_ stuffed animals," Hyungwon's eyes widened suddenly. "Kihyun, what if I drop in front of the fans?! They'll know! And I'm documented as a neutral, so it'd be this huge deal, and no one would understand, they'd think-"

"Hyungwon, Hyungwon," Kihyun shushed, wrapping his arms around the taller. "Don't worry about that right now. If you feel like you're going to drop, just leave the table. Say that you're sick, manager will take you home and we'll follow you as soon as we can. It's going to be okay, you're okay." 

Hyungwon breathed into Kihyun's neck for a few more moments, letting his words sink in. Right. It couldn't be that bad. All he had to do was say he felt sick, and their manager would take him back to the dorm.

A knock on the door alerted them to the fact that it was time for their fan sign, and Hyungwon pulled away. The two exited the bathroom, and Hyungwon purposefully avoided eye contact with the rest of the group. One wrong look could send him over the edge, and Hyungwon had to be strong right now.

For the most part, things went okay at first. They all sat down, met a few fans, and things were running smoothly. Hyungwon was feeling a bit better, more in control. That was, until he saw the stuffed elephant.

Hyungwon's favorite animal was an elephant. Hyungwon was also secretly jealous of the stuffed dog that Kihyun was always carting around when he was little. 

Elephant + stuffed animal = a Hyungwon who was about to lose his shit because the stuffed elephant,  _his_ stuffed elephant, was being given to Changkyun, and not him.

Hyungwon had been so focused on the toy that he totally forgot he had been having a conversation with the fan in front of him. He snapped himself out of it, attention going back to the fan, who's look of confusion was making Hyungwon anxious. How much had she seen?

The fan looked between the stuffed animal and Hyungwon a few times, the look of confusion still present. Hyungwon's heart was about to beat out of his chest. He attempted to ask the girl a question, something basic, like how her day was, but she didn't answer him. Hyungwon felt light headed.

"But you're out as a neutral? Why would you lie about that?" she asked finally, a look of hurt replacing the look of confusion. The look of hurt slowly morphed into a look of anger, however, and Hyungwon was beginning to piece together that this girl must be a little herself. "Are you  _ashamed_ to be a little, Hyungwon?"

Hyungwon froze, the world spinning in slow motion around him. Tears sprang to his eyes. His hearing sounded like it was underwater. 

He pushed back his chair, body shaking violently. He moved out of the room, and into the hallway. Their manager, who had witnessed the whole ordeal, followed him, concerned for the boy.

Hyungwon was stood in the hall, back against the wall, struggling to breathe. Their manager, who somehow always knew exactly what to do, gently took Hyungwon's arm and steered him out of the building and into the van. He helped the younger into the vehicle, then climbed into the drivers seat and began their ride back to the dorm.

Hyungwon felt like shit. He wished it was as easy as him just lying about being a little. But he truly was a neutral, the testing doesn't lie. Hyungwon wished he knew why he wasn't like the average neutral, wasn't like he statistically should be. A neutral able to enter little space was an  _incredibly_ rare occurrence, so of course that fan wouldn't have understood. Of course she would have thought that he was lying.

Hyungwon shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Only a few more moments until he would be home, in the safety of their dorm. 

Their manager pulled the van up to the curb, and Hyungwon thanked him quickly before jumping out of the car and into the building. He darted up the stairs and dropped his keys several times before finally being able to open the door.

Once he was inside, he slammed the door, locking it behind him. He slid down the back of the door and onto the floor, letting out the tears he had been holding in all day. He was  _so_ stressed out, and all he wanted was for someone, anyone to hold him, and tell him that he wasn't a liar. 

Hyungwon sniffled a few more times, before the weight was lifted off his shoulders. He felt a million times lighter. The sense of discomfort was still vaguely there, but now that Hyungwon was little, it was much more manageable.

Hyungwon stayed on the floor for a bit longer, before standing up on wobbly legs and walking further into the dorm. He entered the room that the caregiver's shared, where he felt safest. He curled up on Hyunwoo's bed, but something was still missing. Hyungwon sat up, eyes searching the room, hoping to spot an abandoned stuffed animal. Hyungwon had no idea where his obsession with stuffed animals came from, he just knew that when he was little, he wanted one with him at all times.

His eyes landed on a patch of fur on Hoseok's bed, so Hyungwon got up and headed over to it. He frowned when he picked it up however, as it was Bark, Kihyun's stuffed dog.

Hyungwon bit his lip. He wanted a stuffed animal to cuddle with, but he didn't want to hurt Kihyun's feelings by taking Bark. Fresh wave of tears threatening to fall, Hyungwon placed the stuffed animal back on the bed exactly as it was before, and turned over to Changkyun's bed, which he flopped onto. Hyungwon opted to grab one of the spare blankets at the foot of Changkyun's bed, and wadded it up before pulling it close to his chest. It was soft, and if Hyungwon closed his eyes and pretended really hard, it felt sort of like a stuffed animal.

\---

Hyungwon woke up to the sound of hushed voices in the room. He sat up, rubbing his eyes groggily, clutching his blanket closer to his chest.

When his vision cleared, and he looked across the room to see Hyunwoo and Changkyun, all of the pent up emotions from the day built up and Hyungwon couldn't keep it together anymore.

So he just started crying. All of the stress, emotional frustration, and hurt from the girls comment at the fan sign came rushing back, and Hyungwon just wanted to be held.

Hyunwoo's eyes widened in alarm when he heard Hyungwon's cries. He darted across the room and pulled the boy into his chest, holding him tightly. One of Hyungwon's hands clutched Hyunwoo's shirt in a death grip, while the other held his pretend blanket stuffed animal close to his chest. Changkyun knelt in front of Hyungwon, giving him some time to get his emotions in order.

"Manager told us what happened, baby. Are you okay?" Changkyun asked.

Hyungwon sniffed, wiping his eyes. "Girl mad?" he asked, but his voice was so fogged over in tears that it took Changkyun a few moments to understand him.

"Of course not, baby. No one is mad at you." Changkyun said. That wasn't entirely true. After Hyungwon had darted out of the fan sign, all attention had been turned on the girl, who's face had become bright red in embarrassment. Jooheon, who had been sitting next to Hyungwon and had heard the last part of what the girl had said to Hyungwon, turned to face her.

"You should probably leave," Jooheon said, attempting to sound as polite as possible. At the other end of the table, the other members were looking down at Jooheon and the girl worriedly, after having watched Hyungwon leave.

"But why? Why did he lie? Why would Hyungwon lie about being a little?" the girl was becoming angry again, and had drawn the attention of the girl behind her in line, who gasped at her comment. 

Jooheon blanched. He needed to do damage control.  _Now._

"I have no idea what you're talking about. Hyungwon hasn't lied about anything. He's been feeling a bit nauseous all day today, which is why he had to leave. Now if you wouldn't mind proceeding down the line." Jooheon said, fake smile plastered to his face.

"No one is mad at you, Hyungwon." Changkyun continued to reassure.

Once Hyungwon had finally calmed down, Changkyun reached into his bag, ready to see Hyungwon smiling again. Both caregivers had seen how Hyungwon had eyed the elephant stuffed animal at the fan sign, and the way he was holding Changkyun's blanket was definitely sending the signal that stuffed animals were important to Hyungwon.

Changkyun pulled the elephant out, holding it out to Hyungwon. Hyungwon's eyes bulged out.

"'fint!" he said excitedly, reaching out to grab the elephant and hold it close. "For me?" he asked, eyes still wide.

"Yes baby, all for you." Changkyun smiled.

\---

After Hyungwon had calmed down completely, Hyunwoo and Changkyun took the boy by the hand and led him out into the kitchen to have some dinner, which had been prepared by Kihyun (who was currently in his adult headspace, as were Jooheon and Minhyuk). Changkyun led Hyungwon to the table and sat him down, while Hyunwoo went to grab a plate of food for him, as the others had already eaten. Hyungwon was still clutching his stuffed elephant.

At the same time, Jooheon and Minhyuk walked into the kitchen. Upon seeing Hyungwon cuddled onto Changkyun's lap, Minhyuk let out a screech of "Cuuuuttteeee!!!" before darting over to interact with little Hyungwon. Minhyuk's screech drew the attention of Hoseok and Kihyun, who had been in the living room. The two entered the kitchen, both sending fond smiles towards Hyungwon, who had buried his head in Changkyun's neck out of embarrassment. 

As the others all sat down at the table to interact with little Hyungwon, Jooheon held back. Seeing Hyungwon on Changkyun's lap like that - it made an uncomfortable, dark feeling settle into the pit of his stomach. It'd been weeks since he'd been allowed to sit on Changkyun's lap and cuddle with him, what made Hyungwon so special? 

Jooheon shook his head abruptly, clearing away those thoughts. An embarrassed blush tinted his cheeks as he realized what he had just been thinking. He attempted to push those thoughts and feelings aside as he sat down with the others at the table. This seemed to be a mistake as well, as seeing all of the attention being given to Hyungwon was hurting Jooheon. Ever since Kihyun had been little for the first time, nearly all of the attention had been focused on him. Now that that was beginning to die down, Jooheon had thought that things would go back to normal, and that Changkyun would pay more attention to him again, but apparently that wasn't the case. As was illustrated by Hyungwon currently in  _Jooheon's_ rightful place on Changkyun's lap.

Jooheon squeezed his eyes shut, attempting to once again close out those thoughts. It was selfish of him to be feeling this way, and Jooheon knew it. He knew that Kihyun and Hyungwon deserved every ounce of attention and love that they were receiving, and then some. But to get that communicated to his little side? Jooheon knew he was going to be in trouble the next time he dropped.

Hyunwoo entered the room with Hyungwon's plate of food, and the others watched in amusement as Hyungwon attempted to feed himself. After his third or fourth failed attempt at using children's silverware, Hyungwon let out a huff of frustration, looking over to Hoseok who was in the chair next to him. "H'ung help?" he asked, puppy eyes in full effect.

Hoseok smiled, making a game of delivering Hyungwon's food to his mouth. Hoseok repeatedly saying "here comes the airplane!" each time he scooped up a bit of food for Hyungwon never failed to make the boy giggle, and to the others, it was one of the cutest things they'd ever seen.

\---

After dinner, Hoseok decided that Hyungwon was long overdue for some play time. He dug out a few toys from their little's collection, including stuffed animals, toy cars, and a coloring book. 

After Changkyun had cleaned the boy up after dinner, the two ventured into the living room where Hoseok had told them to meet him. Hyungwon's eyes went wide at the sight of all of the toys laid out in front of him.

"You can pick whatever you want to play with, baby. Does that sound fun?" Hoseok asked with a laugh, as Hyungwon plopped down on the floor to more closely assess his options.

His hands finally settled on the coloring book, and Hoseok slid him some crayons and moved their coffee table over for the boy to color on. Hyungwon scribbled away happily, but when Hosoek attempted to lean over to see what Hyungwon was coloring, Hyungwon gasped, throwing his entire upper body over his picture, and said, "'Seok no! Not done!" and made sure that Hoseok was far enough away from him that he couldn't see his picture before he uncovered it.

Once Hyungwon was done coloring his picture, he shyly handed it over to Hoseok, who smiled encouragingly, ruffling Hyungwon's hair. Hoseok glanced at the picture, and his smile widened even further.

Hyungwon hadn't colored on one of the pictures already in the book, but had flipped to one of the blank pages at the end and had made his own picture. In it he had drawn each member of their group, including Kihyun's stuffed dog and Hyungwon's new stuffed elephant, and a few scribbles that somewhat resembled Jooheon's toy cars. 

"This is so good, baby! Why don't we go hang it up?" Hyungwon nodded his head excitedly, bouncing after Hoseok into the kitchen to hang up his picture. 

After he had hung up the picture, Hoseok took Hyungwon's hand and led him into his bedroom with the promise of watching some cartoons before bed. Hoseok got Hyungwon changed into pajamas, and tucked into bed before climbing in alongside him, Changkyun on the other side. The two caregivers wrapped an arm around Hyungwon, as the little turned his attention to the cartoons playing from the laptop that was balanced on top of his stomach.

Hyungwon lasted all of five minutes before falling asleep, and Hoseok and Changkyun cheered together silently in victory.  _Mission accomplished!_

Hoseok and Changkyun watched Hyungwon sleep for a few moments, before turning off the cartoons and gently untangling themselves from the boy. Changkyun made sure Hyungwon was covered enough with the blankets, and that he had his stuffed elephant tucked into his arm before the two left the room, flipping off the light. 

In the hallway, Changkyun and Hoseok smiled at each other. 

"Today was good. Right?" Changkyun asked. Such a loaded question, stated in so few words.

"Right." Hoseok affirmed, smiling brightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this little Hyungwon chapter. :) I plan on writing little Minhyuk and little Kihyun's make up, along with little Jooheon dealing with his jealousy and other emotions in the next chapter! Let me know if you have any requests!


	10. Punishment (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot of people asked to hear more about Minhyuk's punishment from chapter 7, so the timeline for this chapter is a bit wonky. It's meant to take place right after Minhyuk acts out in chapter 7, but before the events of the last chapter. So please feel free to go back and re-read if you need to!

Minhyuk knew he messed up.

One glance at Kihyun sprawled out on the floor, eyes wide in shock and fear after being shoved, and Hyunwoo's uncharacteristically angry voice sounding from the other end of the room was all the confirmation Minhyuk needed to know that he had royally fucked up.

The guilt hit him like a ton of bricks as Hyunwoo ordered him to go to the bedroom. Minhyuk knew what kind of punishment that entailed.

There were three types of punishments that the caregivers used with the littles. The first type, used when it was a simple case of acting out, such as being whiny or resisting bed time, was toys being taken away, or privileges removed. The second was most commonly used when the littles got mouthy (Minhyuk was the main culprit in this category) and would result in a time out. The third type of punishment was reserved for only the worst kind of behavior. When one of the littles broke a big rule, (which Minhyuk had most definitely just done by physically hurting Kihyun), they would be spanked. And Minhyuk did  _not_ like being spanked.

Minhyuk rushed out of the room and into the bedroom. He knew that Hyunwoo would wait a few minutes before coming in, to make Minhyuk think more about his actions. Thinking about what he had just done to Kihyun, however, only made Minhyuk feel worse. So much so, that he had begun crying even before Hyunwoo had entered the room. Usually, he was able to hold himself together until the first couple spanks, but Minhyuk just felt so overwhelmingly  _guilty._ He had  _hurt_ Kihyun. He had hurt the boy that he loved dearly, and always made sure to take care of and look after like a younger brother, both in and out of his headspace. 

Minhyuk's stomach hurt. This was the worst he had ever felt mentally while in little space. Usually, little space was used as a method of escaping stress, or dealing with emotional pain. But now Minhyuk was feeling  _terrible_ in his headspace. He didn't like it at all.

Footsteps approaching the bedroom made Minhyuk's head shoot up towards the door. He gulped nervously, and took a deep breath. Minhyuk knew he would feel better after the punishment, that his guilt would be alleviated. 

The door opened, but Minhyuk didn't look up to meet Hyunwoo's eyes. Hyunwoo said nothing, moving across the room to sit on the bed near Minhyuk.

"Come on, Minhyuk. Up and over." Hyunwoo said. Minhyuk still hadn't turned his face towards the light, so when he finally did, Hyunwoo was slightly shocked to see the younger already crying. Usually, Minhyuk would refuse to cry out of stubbornness until halfway through his punishment, when he just couldn't hold back anymore. It made Hyunwoo slightly uneasy, but he knew what he needed to do.

Minhyuk obeyed immediately, lying himself across Hyunwoo's lap. He brought his arms up to his head and hid his face in them. Also unusual.

Hyunwoo faltered for only a moment before pulling Minhyuk's sweatpants down to rest on the back of his thighs. Minhyuk shifted uncomfortably. He always hated that part.

"Can you tell me why you're being punished, Minhyuk?" Hyunwoo asked.

Another twinge of guilt hit Minhyuk's gut. "I hurt Kihyunnie, Appa."

"Yes. You broke our most important rule. How many do you think you deserve?" Minhyuk had always hated when Hyunwoo asked that. One of the first times Minhyuk had been spanked, Hyunwoo had asked that same question, and Minhyuk being Minhyuk, had spat out a sarcastic 'None!' that he had immediately come to regret.

Today, however, Minhyuk was so weighed down with guilt that he felt like a million spanks wouldn't be enough to punish him for what he'd done. Minhyuk tilted his head to the side, sniffled, and let out a broken, "I deserve a million, Appa." before burying his head again.

Hyunwoo faltered once again. Something was very wrong. This behavior was way out of character for Minhyuk, but so were his actions earlier. And Minhyuk hitting Kihyun was absolutely unacceptable, and he very clearly needed to be punished. 

"I don't think you need a million, baby. Let's start with fifteen, okay?" Hyunwoo said. Minhyuk didn't reply.

Hyunwoo steeled himself, and raised his hand, bringing it down harshly. Minhyuk flinched, but otherwise made no sound.

After five more, Minhyuk was openly sobbing, but he was making no move to escape Hyunwoo's hold like he usually did. Hyunwoo was about to stop, as he realized this method of punishment was not having the right effect on Minhyuk. Usually Minhyuk would calm down, and feel settled towards the end of the punishment, all guilt for the misbehavior vanished. This however, was not currently happening. Minhyuk was getting more and more upset, and Hyunwoo knew it was time to stop and try something else.

Just as he was moving to pull Minhyuk's sweatpants back up, Jooheon burst into the room. Hyunwoo's eyes widened in surprise, as the littles knew they were never supposed to interrupt a punishment.

Jooheon, however, was not currently little. "Hyung, you need to stop. Kihyun is really upset about being able to hear everything." he said, before slamming the door shut once again.

Hyunwoo froze.  _Of course._ How could he have been so stupid? Of course Kihyun would be upset!

Minhyuk shifted in Hyunwoo's lap, reminding Hyunwoo of where he was. Hyunwoo pulled Minhyuk's sweats up, sitting the boy up and pulling him in to his chest. Minhyuk resisted.

"No, Appa, need more! Was bad! Still don't feel good," Minhyuk cried, trying to lay himself across Hyunwoo's lap again.

Hyunwoo was at a slight loss. He had heard of this happening, but had never experienced it with his littles. Sometimes, when a little broke a particularly important rule, or acted out in a way that they knew was really bad, they would feel so guilty that no level of punishment could appease that guilt. Hyunwoo had even heard stories of littles feeling so awful, that they would force themselves out of headspace, and not be able to enter it again for months. 

"Shh, baby, it's okay." Hyunwoo said, grip tightening around Minhyuk, but the boy was nearly hysterical.

"No! I hurt Kihyunnie! Was so bad I..." the rest of Minhyuk's words were lost in a jumble of tears into Hyunwoo's neck. Hyunwoo continued to rock the boy, until he finally began to calm down. It took nearly an hour.

Minhyuk finally stilled against Hyunwoo's chest, demeanor suddenly changing. Hyunwoo's fears were confirmed. 

Minhyuk pulled away, rubbing his face with his shirt sleeve. "Well, fuck." he said.

Hyunwoo pulled away to give a now in adult headspace Minhyuk, some space. "Are you okay?" Hyunwoo asked, voice dripping with concern.

"I don't know. Holy shit." Minhyuk said, looking slightly dazed. "That's never happened before. I have never felt _that_ bad in headspace." Upon seeing Hyunwoo shift uncomfortably, MInhyuk was quick to say, "It wasn't because of you, Hyung. You were perfect. I just took hitting Ki-um, what I did, really seriously apparently." 

"Do you want to go try to talk to him? Maybe apologizing would help?" Hyunwoo asked. Punishment had not been effective, so Minhyuk most likely needed to see that Kihyun was okay and not mad at him. 

Minhyuk, however, shook his head adamantly. "No, not right now. Just the thought of being little makes me feel... really sick." 

\---

Minhyuk continued to feel sick over the course of the next five days, still refusing to enter little space. This was his longest streak of not being little since they had formed their group, as MInhyuk was usually little for an hour or so a day, if he could be. 

The others were worried. Minhyuk was refusing to be little, and Kihyun had taken to his schedule of avoidance of everyone once again. Hoseok was blaming himself for not explaining punishment to Kihyun better, Hyunwoo was being eaten by shame for not realizing how his punishing Minhyuk within earshot of Kihyun would have affected him, and Chankyun was beating himself up for not handling the situation better.

Needless to say, Monsta X was currently a big 'ol mess. 

After a much needed pep talk from their resident overbearing mother/neutral Hyungwon, the group had snapped into action. Hoseok had cornered Kihyun that night after practice, and the two had finally confessed their feelings for each other, and the group had learned the real true reason for Kihyun avoiding them again. 

Minhyuk, however, was still struggling. He still felt awful for hurting Kihyun, and each time he even considered being little, he felt like he would be sick. It was driving him nuts, as Minhyuk  _loved_ being little, and it was a huge stress-management mechanism for him. 

Minhyuk had also been avoiding Kihyun, as he couldn't even make eye contact with the younger. When he and Hoseok had emerged from his bedroom the morning after they had kissed, Minhyuk had ducked out of the living room and hid in the kitchen until they had to leave for practice. All day at practice, he avoided looking at Kihyun in the mirror, or talking to him during their lunch break. Minhyuk knew he was probably being ridiculously obvious, but his stomach hurt too much for him to care.

When they finally arrived back at the dorm that evening, Hyunwoo took Minhyuk by the shoulders and steered him into the living room before the boy could even so much as think about retreating to the safety of his room for the night.

Minhyuk was sat down on the couch, eyes glued to his feet. He could see Kihyun's legs (he remembered what pants he had been wearing earlier in the day) sitting in the chair across from him.

Minhyuk knew he was being ridiculous, and he knew he definitely needed, and wanted to apologize to Kihyun. But his little and adult headspaces were merging in an uncomfortable way, and making his head all blurry. 

"Minhyuk, I'm not mad at you." Kihyun started, reaching to place a hand on Minhyuk's knee. Minhyuk leaned into the touch.

"I don't really understand what's happening, I really don't feel good and my head is all foggy." Minhyuk breathed. Kihyun's eyebrows furrowed in concern. 

"Do you think you can try to be little? I'll drop with you, so you can see that I'm not mad at you." Kihyun offered.

Minhyuk took a deep breath, and closed his eyes. He fought through the nausea, almost making to get up off the couch because he was sure he would throw up, before his eyes snapped open and he launched himself off the couch and into Kihyun's arms.

Minhyuk was sobbing as his grip tightened around Kihyun. "'M so sorry, Kihyunnie! I'll never do it again, please don't hate me!" 

"S'ok, Min Min." Kihyun said, unsure of what to do. His little side had never seen Minhyuk so upset. It had been a few days since Minhyuk had hit Kihyun, and Kihyun wasn't upset with him at all anymore. Just worried about his big brother.

Minhyuk continued to cry, until he fell slack against Kihyun's chest, dead asleep. The two slept together on the couch for a few hours, the other members coming in to the room to witness the adorable scene (and also to sigh in relief, because Minhyuk would finally be feeling better).

A few hours later, the two boys woke up. Minhyuk was still embarrassed, but Kihyun was quick to get them back into their normal routine. He dragged the older over to their toy box, and the two began to play together.

"Min Min feel better?" Kihyun asked. Minhyuk nodded, smiling shyly at Kihyun. Hyunwoo and Changkyun entered the room, sitting down with the two boys on the floor. Kihyun immediately climbed into Hoseok's lap, making sure to bring Bark and the other couple toys he had been playing with with him. 

Minhyuk kept his gaze down as he felt Hyunwoo sit down behind him. Minhyuk typically got embarrassed and shy after receiving a punishment, so Hyunwoo was always sure to give him lots of love and attention after.

Hyunwoo gently pulled Minhyuk backwards, so that he was sitting with his back against his chest, Hyunwoo's legs on either side of him. Hyunwoo's arms locked around Minhyuk's middle, and his head leaned forward to rest on his shoulder.

"How's my baby boy doing?" Hyunwoo asked, glancing down at Minhyuk's hands, which were holding a couple of action figures. 

Minhyuk blushed at the nickname. Hyunwoo rarely called him that, but it had secretly always been one of Minhyuk's favorite nicknames.

"Better now, Appa." Minhyuk said, relaxing in Hyunwoo's hold.

Hyunwoo smiled into Minhyuk's neck, making the boy giggle and squirm, "that tickles!" 

And oh no. Minhyuk should not have said that because now Hyunwoo's hands were at his sides, digging in gently, sending the boy into hysteric laughter as he tried to squirm out of the caregiver's hold.

"What about this? Does this tickle, too?" Hyunwoo laughed, keeping the boy in his grip.

"Yes! Appa, stop! Daddy help!" Minhyuk yelled between wheezes of laughter, eyeing Hoseok with desperation. Hoseok only laughed fondly in response, continuing to play with Kihyun.

Hyunwoo stopped after a few more laughter-filled moments. God, he would never stop treasuring the sound of his precious boys' laugh.

Minhyuk eventually regained his breath, settling back against Hyunwoo's chest, beginning to play with his toys again, completely relaxed. Hyunwoo sighed in relief. He had his baby boy back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The people asked, and I attempted to deliver. This was my first time actually writing a punishment scene, so I hope it was okay! I know I said that I planned on writing jealous Jooheon into this chapter, but I got a little carried away with Minhyuk and Hyunwoo. But don't worry! I will be (hopefully) updating again tomorrow (wow 3 days in a row can I get an amen) with a Jooheon and Changkyun centric chap.
> 
> If anyone has any requests, I am slowly running out of prompt ideas so please leave anything you would like to see in a comment!


	11. Jooheon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jooheon feels neglected. Lots of angst. You should all know by now that I am apparently incapable of writing pure fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I would like to quickly mention that an alternate scenario to this prompt was written by  Malum  titled Toy Cars and Bruised Hearts it is really well written and takes place in this same universe, so please check it out! 
> 
> (I have no idea how to embed links properly so if those don't work I apologize - but please still search for the story! It's also in my gifted works if that helps)

Jooheon was stressed out.

But just a little. Nothing that he wasn't capable of dealing with. But maybe he could have handled it better if he'd been able to go into little space more than twice in the last few weeks.

The group had been busier than usual with preparing for a comeback and Jooheon being expected to have more songs written. This had often resulted in him locking himself away in his and Changkyun's studio until the early hours of the morning.

Maybe things wouldn't have been so bad if each time Jooheon had come back to the dorm, anywhere from one to all three other littles were in headspace. Ever since Hyungwon had become more comfortable with embracing his little side, he'd been easier to coax into little space, and on top of that, nowadays it was difficult to get Kihyun  _out_ of headspace. Minhyuk was back to being the way he'd always been - little nearly every day. 

Jooheon braced himself before entering the dorm. Sure enough, the sound of the littles playing in the living room flittered out into the hall as he took off his shoes. Jooheon sighed in frustration.

He loved his group, he really did, don't get him wrong. Seeing Kihyun finally be able to accept his little side after years of abuse by his former caregiver had been so amazing to see, and watching Hyungwon accept himself had been such a wonderful thing, too. But that had also meant that now littles outnumbered caregivers 4:3, and that there was a lot less individual attention to go around than when it had been just little Minhyuk and Jooheon.

Jooheon selfishly missed those days. He always had someone chasing after him to talk him down when he needed it, or to make sure he was coming home from the studio before 4am. But for the past few weeks, the caregivers had all been so stressed out and overwhelmed by taking care of more littles than usual that Jooheon couldn't really blame them for forgetting about him.

Jooheon had always had issues with speaking up. Be it raising his hand in school to ask a question, or voicing his opinion while writing a song with the other group members. He never wanted to draw attention to himself or hurt anyones feelings, but he knew he would probably end up doing both of those things in a less than graceful way if he allowed himself to drop into little space with how hurt and abandoned he was feeling right now.

That's why he had come home early from the studio to have a chat with one of the caregivers; any of them at this point. Jooheon would prefer Changkyun, though, if possible. He had always been closest with the younger rapper.

Jooheon entered the living room, eyes searching for Changkyun. When his eyes finally landed on the younger, he stilled. All of his plans for a grown-up discussion flying right out the window as he saw what Changkyun was doing.

Changkyun was sat on the floor with Hyungwon, their knees brushing. On the floor in front of them were toy cars,  _Jooheon's_ toy cars, ones that Changkyun had given  _him,_  but now  _Hyungwon_ was playing with them and ordinarily Jooheon loved sharing his toys but the combination of Hyungwon practically being in Changkyun's lap for the umpteenth time that week when Jooheon hadn't been held like that in  _weeks,_ on top of playing with his toys? No thanks, man. Jooheon was not okay with this development. 

Watching the two interact was breaking Jooheon's heart. No one had noticed he had even entered the room yet. Jooheon continued to watch the two interact, but when Changkyun laughed at something little Hyungwon had said and bopped him on the nose, saying, "Cut it out, you silly pup!" Joohoen had to physically leave the room because he couldn't do this anymore.

Changkyun called Jooheon his puppy. Puppy was  _Jooheon's_ nickname. Now Hyungwon gets to be little, sit in  _his_ Changkyun's lap, and he even gets  _his_ special nickname? 

Jooheon walked right back out of the dorm he had entered not even five minutes prior. No one had even noticed him coming back anyways, so he planned to just say he got back late after they'd all gone to bed. If they even bothered to ask.

Instead of going back to his studio, the one he shared with the last person he wanted to think about right now, Jooheon headed off to one of the practice rooms. He sat down on the bench lining one of the walls, and let his thoughts take over.

Jooheon knew he shouldn't be letting this get to him that much. He knew why the caregivers were giving the new additions to their family more attention, and he knew that it was partially his fault for not speaking up when he needed them. But Jooheon couldn't help but feel as though he had been replaced; like he didn't even matter to the group anymore. It wasn't a good feeling.

Jooheon laid back on the bench, closing his eyes. Sleeping here for the night couldn't be that bad, right? 

\---

Sleeping on a practice room bench for the night actually  _could_ be that bad, Jooheon found out.

He woke up feeling like both his back and neck had fought a war during the night. He groaned, sitting up and attempting to stretch. He looked at the clock - 8am. He remembered Hoseok saying they didn't have anything going on until 10, so Jooheon stood and made his way back to the dorm. 

Jooheon heard sound coming from the kitchen, so he headed that direction. He was thirsty anyways.

Hyunwoo was the one making noise - he appeared to be cooking. Jooheon internally groaned. If Hyunwoo was cooking, it meant Kihyun was still little. 

Hyunwoo turned at the sound of Jooheon's footsteps, smiling at the boy. "Morning, Jooheon! Sleep well?" he asked, turning back to whatever he was stirring on the stove. 

Jooheon froze. 

They hadn't even noticed that he hadn't come back last night. That meant that no one had thought to tuck him into bed. Which meant that  _Changkyun_ hadn't even checked on him. 

Jooheon's heart was breaking, but he put on a smile. "Good, Hyung. What are you making?" 

Jooheon didn't listen for the answer. He didn't even think he would be able to eat whatever Hyunwoo was cooking.

\---

Their schedule was packed that day, but Jooheon was doing an excellent job at pretending that he was okay. No one suspected a thing. Jooheon didn't know whether to applaud himself on his acting skills, or to cry over the fact that not a single one of his three caregivers could tell that something was wrong.

They made it through interview after interview, Jooheon repeatedly cracking off jokes and performing flawless aegyo when asked. By the end of the day though, Jooheon was exhausted. They climbed into the van together, and Jooheon was attempting to muster the courage to ask Changkyun for cuddles when the younger spotted Minhyuk, who had apparently been on the brink of slipping all day. Jooheon watched as Changkyun smiled warmly at Minhyuk before pulling him next to him on their seat in the van, "It's okay to drop now, baby. You did so well today, just let go Min, it's okay now." 

Tears brimmed in Jooheon's eyes as he turned his attention away from the scene and out the window. He blinked them away when Hyunwoo sat in the seat beside him, but instead of asking if Jooheon was okay, Hyunwoo turned sideways in his seat to look at Changkyun and Minhyuk, cooing at the little.

Jooheon's heart broke a little more.

\---

Jooheon finally got desperate enough to ask for attention. 

After being criticized by management for not having more new material written for their next album, Jooheon had been a wreck. He hadn't been allowed to be little in  _so_ long, and the clear mind after coming out of little space was what he needed to write new songs. Instead, his mind was bogged down and hazy and he had taken to bursting into tears alone in his studio, the one that was supposed to be shared by Changkyun but Jooheon hadn't even seen the younger enter his- _their_ one shared space in weeks.

Jooheon felt sluggish and empty when he entered the dorm. He spotted Hyunwoo first, immediately attempting to latch on to his Appa. 

He was so close to slipping, he was  _right there,_ but when he reached to tug on Hyunwoo's arm, he only got to let out the first syllable of "Ap-" before Hyunwoo tugged his arm away, muttering a "Just a second, Jooheon. I'll be right back." 

Hyunwoo looked so tired, and Jooheon felt so guilty. But Jooheon needed this, he needed to be taken care of right now. Hyunwoo was Jooheon's caregiver, and that meant that he would keep to what he said and come back to take care of him, right?

Right?

Jooheon sat down at a stool in the kitchen and waited. And waited. And waited.

Tears were streaming down Jooheon's face as his mind raced. Hyunwoo didn't come back. Hyunwoo broke his promise. Hyunwoo doesn't love him anymore.

Hyunwoo loves Minhyuk. And Kihyun. And Hyungwon.

But he doesn't love Jooheon.

\---

After sitting at a stool in the kitchen for two hours, Jooheon pulled himself together and left. Everything felt heavy, but especially his heart. Jooheon opened the door to his room and laid down on his bed. 

He didn't sleep at all that night. He was hurting so much, but no one knew it. He had three caregivers, but not one loved him anymore. They had better littles now, Jooheon supposed. Hyungwon was bright and funny, constantly making the others laugh when he was little. Kihyun was a total sweetheart, always on his best behavior. Minhyuk was clingy and cute, so where did Jooheon fit? It just didn't seem like there was a place for him anymore. 

\---

The next day was just as long and exhausting as the day before, only this time, there was a photoshoot. 

This was all fine and dandy until they had to pair up for partner shots, and of course Jooheon was paired with Changkyun.

Jooheon screamed internally. Why.  _Why why why?!_

The makeup stylist finished fixing up the last of Jooheon's makeup before shooing him off in the direction of Changkyun, who was already standing in front of the camera.

Joohoen kept his eyes down, moving to stand next to the younger and await instructions from the photographer.

The photographer instructed them to sit down and "look sexy" next to each other, which wasn't too difficult. But then they were instructed to go change into their second outfits and come back. Jooheon could tell immediately that the second half of the photoshoot was meant to be more light than the first, as he had changed from a leather jacket and into a soft, baggy sweater.

That was when things got awkward. They were instructed to lean on each other, and at one point Jooheon had to lay his head on the younger's shoulder. Jooheon was trying to not get drunk off of the physical contact, as it was the most he'd had in weeks.

"Okay, okay, stop. What's going on, guys?" the photographer asked gently, kneeling down in front of them. "Jooheon, you're so tense and you look uncomfortable in all of these photos. Just relax. He's your caregiver, right?" he asked, motioning to Changkyun. Jooheon took a second too long to answer.

Truthfully, Jooheon didn't know if Changkyun was his caregiver anymore. He didn't know if he even had  _any_ caregivers anymore.

The photographer quirked an eyebrow at Jooheon's lack of response, but Jooheon quickly snapped out of it. "Yes," he mumbled, but it sounded less certain than he had intended.

The photographer looked hesitant and unsure, glancing between Changkyun and Jooheon. Jooheon hadn't looked up once. 

The awkwardness of the situation hadn't even hit Jooheon, as he was currently emotionally numb, from head to foot. 

"Okay. Let's try just a few more, then you guys can head home early. It looks like you have something you need to take care of." the photographer said. Jooheon missed the dirty look he sent to Changkyun.

The photoshoot finally ended, and they were all carted back to the van and driven to the dorm. Before Jooheon could leave the van, however, their manager stopped him.

"Jooheon, please don't forget to finish those couple of songs soon, okay? I know you've been busy but the other managers are starting to get antsy." he said, smiling gently at Jooheon.

In the front seat, Hoseok blinked in confusion. Jooheon had been working on songs? Their managers had been getting on his case about getting them done sooner? 

Usually, Hoseok wrote with Jooheon, or Jooheon wrote with Changkyun, or sometimes it was all three of them. Jooheon rarely ever wrote by himself.

Jooheon nodded and stepped out of the van. Before anyone could stop him he was already off and down the hall, headed in the direction of his studio rather than their dorm.

\---

"Hey guys..." Hoseok started nervously. "When was the last time Jooheon was little?" 

The rest of Monsta X was still stood in the hallways, watching the retreating figure of Jooheon. 

"Oh,  _shit._ " Hyunwoo exclaimed, eyes widening in alarm. "He came to me about a week ago, that night when Kihyun and Minhyuk were little and tried baking for the first time and had needed a bath, and it looked like he was about to slip, so I sat him down in the kitchen and told him I'd be right back..." 

Guilt bubbled up in Hyunwoo's gut like bile, as he remembered the look of desperation on Jooheon's face that he had been too tired to notice in the moment. Kihyun and Minhyuk had made an absolute mess out of the kitchen and themselves when Hyungwon had thought it would be a good idea to teach them how to bake cookies, so Hyunwoo had been dealing with cleaning up the mess, as well as helping with bath time (Minhyuk hated baths, but Kihyun loved them. Kihyun generally loved everything) so he had been a bit overwhelmed. That was still no excuse for literally  _forgetting_ about the little he had left waiting for him in the kitchen.

"We've all been little so much," Minhyuk said, gesturing to himself, Kihyun, and Hyungwon, "No wonder he was feeling left out."

Hyungwon's eyes widened, "I've been um, clingy with Changkyun so that couldn't have helped either." Hyungwon said, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

Changkyun was staring after Jooheon in a daze. Of course. Everything made sense. Changkyun had been a little confused about Jooheon's reluctance to get close to him at the photoshoot, but he had chalked it up to Jooheon being reserved about showing his less masculine side on camera. But when the photographer had made his snarky remark, things had begun to click. Jooheon hadn't been at the dorm much, and he'd been writing songs by himself, both of which were unusual. He had also been reserved and quiet, but acted normally while they were on camera or in front of fans. Changkyun's heart twinged. Of course he had acted normally. Changkyun knew Jooheon was not one to draw attention to himself, and generally didn't think of himself or his needs as anything of importance. Changkyun had helped him to change that thinking early on in their caregiver-little relationship, but all of it was apparently backfiring now.

"Oh Jesus, we messed up." Minhyuk muttered.

Changkyun, who had said nothing up to this point, headed off to follow Jooheon. The others let him go, as they knew Changkyun would be the only one able to get through to Jooheon right now.

\---

Jooheon slammed his head against the desk in his studio, frustration rising once again. He had written tons of songs, tons of raps in his career, why was this one causing him so much trouble? 

He jumped when he heard the door to the studio rattle, but Jooheon knew it wouldn't open, as he had locked it. Jooheon figured it was just the custodian checking to make sure the practice rooms and studios were all locked up for the night before he left.

His head shot up in confusion as he heard the jiggling continue, and then the rattle of keys. Only one other person had keys to the studio.

The door opened to reveal Changkyun. Jooheon braced himself before looking up, plastering his fake smile on and welcoming Changkyun into the space. Changkyun didn't smile back.

Jooheon was uneasy. Changkyun was just standing there, staring at him. Changkyun shook his head, snapping himself out of it, and turned to close and lock the door behind him.

Jooheon stilled. The door to their studio was never locked, let alone by Changkyun. Jooheon was the only one who ever locked it, which the caregivers made him do if he stayed in the studio late at night by himself.

Changkyun crossed the room and sat across from Jooheon on the second couch. Jooheon placed his gaze back down on his papers and laptop sprawled open in front of him, pretending as though he was going back to work, but he couldn't focus on anything but the heat of Changkyun's gaze.

"Why are you staring at me?" Jooheon asked quietly. Was Changkyun waiting for him to admit to something? Had he broken a rule or done something wrong? "Am I in trouble?" he added, voice softer this time.

Changkyun still hadn't answered. Jooheon was becoming more and more uncomfortable. 

"Oh baby, I'm so sorry." Changkyun said, moving to sit next to Jooheon. "We've been neglecting you." 

Jooheon immediately put his walls up. This was too good to be true. He was finally alone with the caregiver he (not so) secretly loved most, and Changkyun was trying to talk him down. But Jooheon didn't want to slip anymore. He didn't want to be just one more little for their caregivers to worry about. And now that he knew how much it hurt to be neglected, and had managed to somewhat deal with it, he wasn't too up for the idea of opening himself up to that kind of pain again.

"I don't know what you're talking about, I'm fine." Jooheon said, smiling at Changkyun again. "You guys have been busy with the other three."

"Baby, why are you trying to hide from me?" Changkyun asked, settling a hand on Jooheon's knee.

Jooheon flinched away, but attempted to hide it as reaching forward to grab a different piece of paper. It had the wrong lyrics on it, but it's not like Changkyun would know the difference.

Jooheon was growing frustrated. "I'm okay, Changkyun. You can go back to the others now." At this point, Jooheon just wanted Changkyun out of his safe space. He wanted to be alone where he could hurt without being judged. It didn't matter that all he wanted was to cuddle up with Changkyun and cry his heart out. 

Changkyun was growing desperate. He could tell Jooheon was getting angry, and that's not where he wanted this to go. So he pulled out his last resort. 

"Come on, puppy. It's okay." 

Jooheon lost it. He slammed his laptop shut, and sent half of his papers flying as he jumped off of the couch and across the room, eyes wide and full of hurt.

"No," he muttered, and then the dam broke, and Jooheon was sobbing, "You call Hyungwon that now, not me. You let him play with my cars and called him your puppy and-" Jooheon cut himself off, and Changkyun watched as he  _physically_ reeled himself back in. "It's okay. I'm okay. I shouldn't be acting like this."

Still frozen on the couch, Changkyun was mortified. This was his fault. Jooheon must have been there when he had been playing with Hyungwon. He didn't realize that letting the little play with Jooheon's toy cars would hurt the younger, as Jooheon was usually so happy about sharing his toys. But Changkyun realized how playing with Hyungwon, letting him play with his toys, and calling him by the name that was usually reserved for Jooheon would definitely be upsetting to the boy, considering how fragile his mindset seemed to be. 

"Oh baby, this isn't your fault, it's all on us. I never should have called Hyungwon that, especially since its what I call my favorite boy." 

Jooheon stilled at Changkyun's words.  _There we go._

"F-favorite?" Jooheon asked, suddenly seeming two feet tall.

"Yes, baby. My favorite boy. My puppy." Changkyun slowly crossed the room until he was standing only a few inches away from Jooheon.

"Please don't forget about me again. I-it hurt so much and I thought none of you loved me anymore." Jooheon said, finally falling forward and into Changkyun's arms.

"Never again, pup. I promise baby, we all love you so much." Jooheon relaxed into Changkyun's hold, but Changkyun could tell that something wasn't quite right. Jooheon still wasn't little.

\---

The two made their way back to the dorm, Changkyun practically forcing Jooheon to leave early despite still not being finished with the track he was working on. Changkyun was confused as to why Jooheon still refused to drop, but he decided to let it go for a moment, to give the boy time to relax around them again.

Upon entering the dorm, it became apparent to Jooheon that the rest of the members must also have caught on to the way Jooheon had been feeling lately. All eyes were on him as he entered the living room, and he blushed, unused to all of the attention.

He also noticed that no one else was little, and figured that was probably intentional. Jooheon groaned internally. He was being a burden again, and it was the last thing he wanted. He wanted his Hyungs to be able to relax when they needed to, and he didn't want his caregivers to feel bad about hurting his feelings for neglecting him once in a while.

For a moment, he felt like bring ignored was better than having all eyes on him like this.

So he ducked around the corner and back into his room before anyone could stop him, uttering some excuse under his breath. He stayed in his room for a bit before heading back out once he smelled dinner.

Kihyun must have been stress cleaning, as Jooheon vaguely had time to notice that the living room looked quite a bit cleaner than it had before, before he bumped into the corner of their bookshelf that had been pulled away from the wall slightly, and sent the decorative vase that Kihyun's mom had bought them for their dorm when they had moved in together tumbling to the floor.

Jooheon lunged forward in an attempt to catch it, but to no avail. It hit the floor, shattering into thousands of pieces. Jooheon followed it, everything moving in slow motion as he launched into little space faster than he hit the floor.

Oh no. He was going to be in so much trouble. He broke a rule. He broke Kihyun's mom's vase. Kihyun was going to be upset. The caregivers were going to be upset.  _Changkyun_ was going to be upset.

Someone was shaking him. Jooheon looked up and flinched away, everything finally zooming back into focus. 

"-heon! Are you hurt? Baby, I need you to talk to me!" Hoseok said, continuing to shake the dazed little.

"I-I'm sorry," Jooheon blubbered out, "Th-the bookshelf was pulled out and I didn't see it and I broke the vase, I'm sorry, Daddy!" Jooheon managed to get out between fits of tears.

"Hush, baby, hush, it's okay, it was an accident, no one is mad at you. Are you hurt anywhere?" Jooheon was still dazed and unfocused, eyes seemingly searching for something, "Jooheon, I need you to tell me if you're hurt." Hoseok prodded once again. 

Jooheon furrowed his brows together, seemingly taking note of his body condition. Hoseok would have thought it was cute if he didn't feel so guilty.

"H-hurts here." Jooheon said, pointing to his chest. More specifically, his heart. 

Hoseok thought he was going to lose it. How had they managed to mess up this bad?

Changkyun rounded the corner next, and that seemed to be exactly what Jooheon was waiting for. His eyes widened and he began to cry harder, leaning away from Hoseok and holding his arms up to Changkyun. "Papa," he cried out.

Changkyun's eyes widened as he darted towards the boy, pulling him up and into his arms. "Is he hurt?" he asked Hoseok, who shook his head.

"Shh, pup. It's okay." Changkyun said as he walked around the living room, bouncing Jooheon soothingly. 

Jooheon seemed as though he was about to doze off, before he lifted his head up again. "P-papa, I broke rule. Broke vase." Jooheon said, twisting around in Changkyun's hold to point at the mess on the floor.

Changkyun realized with a start that Jooheon was waiting for his punishment. "No, baby, that was an accident. No punishment, okay?" Changkyun soothed. Jooheon didn't respond, just laid his head back on Changkyun's shoulder.

Changkyun carried him over to the couch, where he pulled Jooheon up and onto his chest. He knew how much Jooheon loved sleeping like this.

"We really hurt you, didn't we, baby?" Changkyun muttered, running his hands through Jooheon's hair. "It's been hard getting used to having two more littles. But that's no excuse for the three of us neglecting you. We'll do better, baby. I promise." 

\---

After Jooheon had taken a nap with Changkyun, he seemed to be in a much better state of mind. He was still a bit shy in front of the caregivers, and whenever Hyungwon entered the room he would latch on to Changkyun like a koala as if to be sure no one else could come near  _his_ Changkyun. Hyungwon had laughed fondly at that.

They had fed their little dinner, and made sure someone was playing with him at all times. Jooheon had been given his toy cars, and assured by Hyunwoo that they were his, and that no one else would play with them unless Jooheon said it was okay.

The caregivers knew they had messed up, but they had taken full responsibility for their actions, and were willing to do anything it took to make it up to Jooheon. Hoseok was working on methods for caring for each of the littles, if they were all little at the same time, that would reassure that none of them would ever get left out again, like the way Jooheon had. 

Changkyun had tried hard not to let his mistakes get to him when Jooheon's eyes had literally _sparkled_  when he had asked if the little wanted to watch cartoons and cuddle. Jooheon had launched himself into the caregivers arms and settled with his back against his chest, sighing contentedly. It only took a few minutes before he was fast asleep for the second time that day.

The two laid on the couch, Changkyun watching Jooheon sleep. Hoseok and Hyunwoo entered soon after, smiling softly as they spotted Jooheon.

"How's he doing?" Hoseok asked. 

"Not good. I can tell he's still holding back a lot, and that he's probably angry but too scared and in need of attention to show it."

"We'll have to get him to let all of that out. It's not good for littles to keep emotions like that all pent up," Hyunwoo added.

"I know, but it's not like it's his fault." Changkyun said with a slight bite to his tone. He quickly muttered an apology.

"Don't worry, Changkyun. We'll make this right." Hoseok reassured, but even he looked uncertain. Going from two littles to four had been extremely difficult, but they would make it work somehow. They had to. A situation like what had happened with Jooheon would never, ever happen again.

When Changkyun went to put Jooheon to bed, he noticed something different. The boy was sucking his thumb.

Jooheon used to suck his thumb a lot when they had first become a group, but the caregivers had quickly extinguished the habit, replacing his thumb with a pacifier and eventually weaning down the pacifier until Jooheon no longer needed it for comfort. Changkyun's heart hurt at the fact that Jooheon had started to need that comfort again.

Changkyun laid the boy down and got him changed into his favorite onesie pajamas. He dug around in the bedside table until he found what he was looking for - Jooheon's old pacifier.

He climbed into bed next to the boy, who immediately laid his head on Changkyun's chest and began to doze off again. Changkyun gently removed Jooheon's thumb from his mouth, and Jooheon's eyes flittered open as he whined softly. Changkyun was quick to pop in the pacifier, which immediately soothed Jooheon.

Changkyun watched in awe as the boy sucked on the pacifier until he fell asleep. He continued running his hands though the littles hair for what felt like hours, just listening to the sound of his breathing.

He would do better for Jooheon. He had to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Please leave a request if there is something you would like to see!


	12. Jooheon (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Jooheon angst, (but also lots of love) because it's what we all need in life.
> 
> Also, all four littles are together for the first time. It's nice and fluffy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi hi hi everyone, sorry for being gone for so long! To make up for it, I plan on updating several times this weekend, so stay tuned!

Two weeks after the caregivers had started looking after Jooheon again, the latter was still struggling.

Jooheon was still unable to shake the thought that he had been replaced, that his caregivers didn't want him anymore. Jooheon had always been deeply insecure about both his little and big side, so it was no real surprise to him that he wasn't handling all of the changes that were taking place very well.

But above all else, Jooheon was angry. He was hurt. He didn't understand how his caregivers could go from treating him like he was their everything, to forgetting about him, in seemingly the blink of an eye. It  _hurt._

But of course Jooheon wouldn't say any of this out loud, he wouldn't dare. The last thing he wanted was to hurt those closest to him, and that's what all of Monsta X was. How were you supposed to tell the people you loved most that all they were doing was hurting you?

The other members weren't blind to this, despite Jooheon's hopeful belief that he wasn't being obvious. That his fake smiles and witty jokes were enough to fool them. They knew he was holding back, and like Changkyun had said, that he was angry. But they all knew that Jooheon and anger rarely corresponded, and that he was having a difficult time sorting through all of his feelings.

They also realized that he was scared of getting in trouble. Changkyun thought that Jooheon was actually more scared of punishment than Kihyun, and  _that_ was saying something. On the rare couple of occasions that Jooheon had been punished (by Hyunwoo, as he was the only caregiver comfortable with giving physical punishment) it had taken him days to come out of the depression that had followed. He had been so ashamed over disappointing his caregivers that he couldn't function.

Monsta X knew that this was why Jooheon was holding back from them. They knew both his big and little side had a lot of anger that needed to be worked through, but big Jooheon was too scared of hurting anyones feelings, while little Jooheon was absolutely terrified of punishment. It was a lose-lose.

But Changkyun refused to let it go on any longer. He knew that Jooheon was in pain, and he was willing to do whatever it took to stop it. Which was what led them to their big confrontation.

"Changkyun, I told you, I'm fine!" Jooheon said for the umpteenth time since Changkyun had come into their shared studio under the guise of working on some songs. Jooheon had been hopeful that that was all he was there for, but of course luck wouldn't be on his side.

"I can see that you're struggling, Joo. That you're angry and holding back and keeping it all pent up. No one is going to be upset with you for letting that out." Changkyun tried to soothe.

Jooheon let out a puff of frustration, turning back to his lyrics and sliding his headphones on in a manner that was not as passive-aggressive as he would have liked. Between the headphones, Jooehon's mind was racing.

Why couldn't Changkyun just _drop_ it already?! All of his pestering was making it just  _that_ much harder to not be angry with him. On top of that, the other caregivers were constantly walking on eggshells around him, and the other littles were trying to be little a lot less so that Jooheon wouldn't feel left out.

Jooheon knew they were trying to be nice, and to make up for their wrongs. But all of it was just piling up and up. Jooheon didn't want anyone to have to change for him - to be little less, or feel obligated to pay attention to him. Jooheon just didn't think he was  _worth_ that.

On the other side of the studio, Changkyun's own frustration was building. In a moment of anger, Changkyun crossed the room and pulled Jooheon's headphones back to where they had been previously hanging on his shoulders. "Don't ignore me, Jooheon." Changkyun hissed, "We need to talk about this."

For a moment, Jooheon just stared blankly at Changkyun. Then his face contorted into absolute rage. 

"Don't ignore you," Jooheon repeated. Changkyun took a step back.

"Don't fucking  _ignore you? That's_ what you choose to say to me?" Jooheon was practically yelling now, unable to control his emotions. Changkyun didn't want  _Jooheon_ to ignore  _him?!_ How fucking rich.

"I-" Changkyun attempted to begin, but was immediately cut off.

"No, you're going to listen to me now." Jooheon growled, stalking towards Changkyun. "For  _weeks_ all you guys do is ignore me, and when I finally get desperate enough to ask for attention, I was ignored yet again. Forgotten about. I get that I'm the least favorite, but  _come on._ Would any of you ever forget if Kihyun needed someone to help him? If Minhyuk was feeling scared? If Hyungwon felt lonely?" Jooheon was rambling now, pacing back and forth across the room. Changkyun was frozen in place.

"I was so scared that none of you wanted me anymore. So I hid away in here," Jooheon said, making a large motion with his arms to refer to the studio the two were currently in, "I hid from you. From all of you. Because if I was hiding, and wasn't in the dorm, I wouldn't have to deal with the pain of being ignored. I wouldn't have to watch you hold Hyungwon or play with him, and tuck  _him_ into bed when you wouldn't even check on me. I slept in the fucking  _practice room,_ I was gone  _all night_ and you didn't even notice!"

Changkyun's jaw hung open. No. He had checked up on Jooheon, hadn't he? There's no way he hadn't!

"I-I" Jooheon stammered, eyes beginning to fill with tears. "That hurt the most. No more cuddles, no more hugs, no more time with just you and me. All I want is you." Jooheon ended, then quickly attempted to backtrack. "T-time with you."

Changkyun was frozen. He literally couldn't move. Couldn't say anything. Couldn't bring his eyes up to even look at Jooheon. Then suddenly he was sobbing, ugly, broken sounds winding their way out of his mouth. Changkyun turned away, bringing his fist up to his mouth to cover the sound.

Jooheon deflated like a balloon. All anger immediately rushing out of his body upon seeing Changkyun cry. Changkyun  _never_ cries.

"C-Changkyun, I-" Jooheon attempted, but then Changkyun was dropping to the floor, and without thinking, Jooheon rushed forward to catch him.

"Kyunnie, please, I'm so sorry," Jooheon attempted to soothe, rocking Changkyun back and forth, like Changkyun used to do with him.

Changkyun turned, grasping Jooheon by the shoulders. He reeled himself in, wiping away his tears with the back of his sleeve. "No, don't you dare say you're sorry. You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. I failed. I failed you, I failed you, how do you fail someone you love?" Changkyun rambled, unaware of what he was saying.

Jooheon didn't allow himself to dwell on the 'someone you love' bit, assuming the younger meant as a caregiver. 

"I-I'm so sorry. We all are. We," Changkyun paused, wiping away the rest of his tears with a watery smile. "We worked out a schedule. So that none of you ever get left out again. It's been hard going from two to four, but that's no excuse for what happened. I'll never be able to communicate to you how sorry I am, baby," Changkyun finished, pulling Jooheon into his arms.

Jooheon went lax, relaxing into the embrace. How he had missed this. Little moments like this, just him and Changkyun. Jooheon buried his nose in Changkyun's neck, inhaling his comforting scent. His arms tightened around the younger.

"S'fine, Kyunnie. Just don't do it again." Jooheon mumbled into his neck, and they both laughed lightly.

\---

When the two got back to the dorm, the sound of at least one little was there to greet them. Jooheon faintly registered the sound of Hoseok making monster noises and a giggling Kihyun - and yep, Minhyuk too - running away from him. Upon entering the living room, he found the rest of the members all sitting around watching the three play, amused smiles on their lips.

"Hey, sweetheart!" Hoseok greeted, wrapping Jooheon up in a hug. Jooheon melted against it. He loved hugs, and getting so many today after going without for so long was making him feel elated. "Do you want to play?" 

And just like that, the switch was flipped, and Jooheon took off after Kihyun and Minhyuk, yelling to them a warning that the big, bad monster was coming back to get them.

\---

Later in the evening, Hyungwon slipped too. He hadn't wanted to, but Hyunwoo could tell that he needed it. So he gently talked the boy down, and now all four littles were playing together. 

Jooheon was still reluctant to be around Hyunwoo, whining in protest when the older had tried to pull him into his lap. Jooheon had also been clinging to Changkyun, and would become protective if Hyungwon so much as glanced at  _his_ Papa.

Jooheon was just about to fall asleep, tucked away into the comfort of Changkyun's chest, when Hyunwoo crouched down in front of him, making him snap his eyes open.

"Hey, little one. Can we talk?" Jooheon sleepily nodded, letting the older grab his hand and pull him up and towards the kitchen. 

Hyunwoo sat him down at the kitchen table, and Jooheon began to fiddle with his fingers nervously as Hyunwoo sat down across from him. 

"I owe you an apology, Jooheon." Hyunwoo began. The little cocked his head in confusion, unsure of what the big words his Appa was using meant. 

Hyunwoo smiled fondly, understanding. "I'm sorry, Jooheon. You came to me when you were sad, and I didn't come back when I promised you that I would." 

Jooheon looked down, eyes brimming with tears at the memory, and how much that moment had hurt. 

"Still love me?" Jooheon asked quietly, eyes trained on his fingers in his lap.

"Oh baby," Hyunwoo said, scooting back his chair and walking around the table to crouch next to Jooheon, wrapping his arms around the boy and pulling him close. "Of course I still love you. I'll always love you baby, forever and ever. Appa is so sorry." Hyunwoo said, his voice breaking.

Jooheon twisted in Hyunwoo's arms, bringing up his hands to cover the older's eyes, "Appa no cry like Papa, please." Jooheon hurried out, determined to not see another of his caregivers cry in one day. One was hard enough.

Hyunwoo let out a watery laugh, removing Jooheon's hands from his face gently, but keeping their fingers intertwined. "I'm so sorry, baby."

"S'ok, Appa. Go play now?" Jooheon asked, bouncing up and down excitedly as the sounds of one of his favorite cartoons started playing from the living room.

Hyunwoo's smile broadened even further. "Of course, sweetheart. Lead the way."

\---

The littles were all together with the caregivers in the living room, and Hoseok noticed faintly that this was the first time that they had all been in the room together at one time.

Kihyun was wrapped up in a blanket next to Minhyuk, who was attempting to show him how to play a game on his phone. Kihyun was completely lost, way too little to understand the rules of the game, choosing instead to tap randomly at the screen and giggle when it made noise. Minhyuk thought it was the funniest thing in the world, and soon the two were erupting into a fit of laughter.

Jooheon was securely nestled next to Changkyun on the couch, head leaning on his shoulders as the two watched cartoons together. Jooheon's eyes eventually fluttered closed, the emotional intensity of the day finally catching up with him.

On the other side of the room, Hyungwon was laid with his head on Hoseok's lap and feet on Hyunwoo's, sprawled across the couch. The little's hand was curled tightly into Hoseok's jeans, making sure that the older wouldn't be able to leave without him waking up. Hoseok smiled down at him fondly, running a hand through his hair.

From the other end of the couch, Hyunwoo scanned the living room with a lazy smile on his face. Taking in Kihyun and Minhyuk playing together, Jooheon, who was now sleeping, cuddled up with Changkyun, and Hyungwon sprawled across his lap, Hoseok smiling down at his sleeping figure, Hyunwoo breathed out a sigh of relief.

Everything was okay. They could do this. Going from two to four littles had been hard, but Hyunwoo knew that if anyone could manage it, it was his group. His family.

They would all be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a quick question for you guys! I've received a few comments that said that you guys want to see Monsta X interact with another K-pop group and their littles - what group would you guys like to see, if I were to write this? I'm familiar enough to write BTS, GOT7, EXO, and Stray Kids, but I would be willing to write a different group if that is something you would like to see! 
> 
> (Also, feel free to recommend new groups for me to get into. One can never stan enough groups)
> 
> As always, please comment with any requests, and thank you for reading!


	13. MX & EXO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Monsta X and EXO hang out. Littles play. Fluff ensues. Sprinkle of angst.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For your reference-  
> EXO caregivers - Junmyeon (he is a MOM your argument is invalid), Chanyeol (YES), Kyungsoo (ALSO YES)  
> Littles - Baekhyun (come on what did you expect this boy is a small child who needs protection), Minseok (who is also a small child and him being the oldest is a fucking conspiracy fight me) 
> 
> ***ALSO IMPORTANT*** I didn't write all members because that is wayyyyy too many bodies to keep track of but rest assured I spent like five hours deciding who I was going to write BUT if someone was not present who you want to see Monsta X interact with, LET ME KNOW FRIENDS I am bored and would love to write more stuff for you all <3

Kihyun usually loved awards shows.

But that was when he most definitely was  _not_ feeling little. Feeling little during an awards show was a  _nightmare._

Despite Kihyun progressing leaps and bounds in terms of confidence with himself and comfortability in being little, he was still very insecure about showing that side of himself in public. And after seeing what had happened last year, when one of the members of another group receiving an award (Youngjae from GOT7) had literally been little  _on stage during their acceptance speech_ , the fans had gone crazy. It was all over the internet, and everyone had thought that Youngjae was the cutest thing they had ever seen. All sorts of edits and inspirational stories came out about how him being confident in being little had inspired them in some way.

While yes, it was inspiring, to Kihyun, it was also terrifying. He felt envious of the ease in which Youngjae had simply clung to Jaebum, standing sightly behind the older and smiling at the crowd shyly from behind him. Yes, it had also been  _very cute,_ but to Kihyun, the thought of dropping in public was nearly unbearable. 

This was why, in the car ride to the awards show venue, Kihyun had laced his fingers with Hoseok's and leaned over to him, "Hyung, I need you to talk to me about some super adult boring stuff," he whispered desperately.

Hoseok's eyes widened for only a moment, before he nodded and pulled his headphones out of his ears. "Want to hear about the new song I've been writing?"

\---

Backstage at the venue, chaos was everywhere. Makeup artists and hair stylists running around trying to find their people, managers yelling into phones. Kihyun was relieved. It was nearly impossible for him to continue feeling little in such an environment. 

When it was their turn to perform, they did so nearly flawlessly. Even though they didn't win anything, it was still as thrilling as it always was to perform in front of their fans. 

It wasn't until after the show, when the adrenaline was rushing out of his system, that Kihyun realized that behind it all, he was still dangerously close to his little headspace. He groaned, running a hand over his face. They still had an interview left, that's all Kihyun needed to make it through, then he could go home and cuddle with Hoseok.

Kihyun excused himself to use the restroom - an excuse to leave for a few moments to collect himself. Hoseok had made to follow him, but Kihyun had waved him off with a smile.

Kihyun shut the stall door, breathing deeply in the safety of the small space. He continued to chant a mantra of 'I can do this, I can do this,' to himself until he felt confident enough to step out of the stall. All he had to do was make it through an interview. He's done this a million times, he can do it once more.

Kihyun swung open the bathroom door and took off slowly down the hallway. He walked for a couple of minutes, before realizing that where he was wasn't familiar.

 _Seriously?_ Kihyun thought angrily to himself. How had he managed to get lost?! He literally only took one turn on the way to the bathroom! 

He continued to wander around for a bit, before he began to panic. There wasn't anyone around to ask for directions, which was strange, because the venue had been packed even after the show had ended. How long had he been in the bathroom?

Kihyun whined softly to himself, eyes darting around frantically. In his desperation to escape for a few moments before their interview, Kihyun had left his phone in their dressing room. He was cursing himself for that now.

"Da-" Kihyun began to yell, but blushed hard, stopping himself. "Hoseok? Hoseok where are you?" he spoke desperately. Kihyun's frantic mind had given him the idea that if he couldn't see Hoseok, maybe the older would hear him if he yelled loud enough. 

He continued to wander before becoming scared once again. "Daddy?" he finally gave in and yelled, tears welling up in his eyes. Where was his daddy? Why was he hiding?

Kihyun was long gone, stress from the last few days finally becoming too much. He'd been feeling little all day, all it would have taken is a small nudge (getting lost, in Kihyun's case) to push him over the edge. Now he was little in public, which had only happened a select few times before. But this time, he was alone.

A door opened down the hallway, and a head topped with bright red hair popped into Kihyun's line of sight. Kihyun backed away - stranger danger. But what if this stranger knew where his Daddy was? Where Appa or Papa were?

The tall man stepped out into the hallway. A small feeling of recognition sparked somewhere in the back of Kihyun's mind, but Kihyun had never been good with remembering people he knew in his big space when he was little.

"Kihyun? Are you okay?" he asked, stepping closer. Kihyun backed away, whimpering nervously.

 "Do-do you know where..." Kihyun blanked. He was trying to sound as 'adult' as he could muster. He wanted to ask this man where his family were, but he couldn't remember what big Kihyun called them. Monster? Mon...

"Oh honey, are you lost?" the man asked, voice so soft and kind that Kihyun's walls fell down easily. He bit his lip, nodding. Tears began to fall freely once again.

"Wan' Daddy" Kihyun cried out. The man came closer, crouching down in front of Kihyun.

"What's your daddy's name, sweet pea? I'm Chanyeol, I'll help you find him."

Kihyun racked his brain for a moment, tilting his head to the side as he thought. ""Seok" he declared finally.

Chanyeol appeared to think for a moment, before a look of realization graced his features. "Oh! Hoseok?" he asked. Kihyun nodded.

Chanyeol reached for his phone in his pocket, before remembering that he had left it inside EXO's dressing room when he had headed out into the hallway to see who was crying for help. He sighed, smiling apologetically up at Kihyun. "I left my phone in my dressing room, can you come with me to get it? Then we can call your Daddy to come and get you." 

Kihyun nodded enthusiastically. Chanyeol held out his hand, and Kihyun immediately took it. He liked Chanyeol, he decided. He was tall and his hair looked cool.

Kihyun followed Chanyeol into the door he had seen him come out of a few minutes prior. There were a few people in the room, all of which looked up when Chanyeol opened the door. 

"There you are! I was just about to come get you-oh, who's that?" a voice asked. Kihyun ducked behind Chanyeol, suddenly nervous once again.

Chanyeol laughed. "It's okay, buddy. This is Junmyeon, he's even nicer than I am." he reassured the nervous little.

Kihyun peeked his head out from behind Chanyeol and was met with a set of the prettiest, kindest eyes he had ever seen. A smile graced the man's lips, and Kihyun's knees felt a little like Jell-O. 

"Pretty," Kihyun blurted softly, before his face burned completely red and he ducked back behind Chanyeol in embarrassment. 

Junmyeon laughed, "Aww, thanks sweetheart. Why don't you come out from behind Yeollie, and we'll get in touch with your group." 

"Yeollie rollie pollie," Kihyun giggled. All he could think of when Junmyeon referred to Chanyeol as 'yeollie' was an American cartoon he had watched one time with Changkyun.

"Oh come on, not you too!" Chanyeol said, raising his hands in exasperation. He headed further into the room, leaving Kihyun alone by the door, and with no shield against the rest of the people in the room. 

"Hey, hun. Want to come sit with me while Yeollie," Junmyeon laughed with Kihyun this time, "calls your Daddy?" 

Kihyun nodded shyly, blushing as he took Junmyeon's hand. He sat with a space between them on the couch.

"This is Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, and Minseok. Those two are littles, just like you!" Junmyeon said, gesturing to Minseok and Baekhyun. 

Baekhyun, who had been watching something on his phone and sharing an earbud with Minseok who was also watching, looked up suddenly, taking notice of the newcomer for the first time. A large smile came onto his face and Baekhyun jumped off the couch, sending his phone flying and very effectively capturing Minseok's attention when his earbud was forcefully ripped out.

" _Baek,"_ Minseok whined, reaching for the earbud and the phone that had landed on the floor, but stopping once he too took notice of what had gotten Baekhyun so excited.

Minseok's eyes widened, eyes darting up to Kyungsoo who was sat next to him. "Daddy, who's that?" he asked, shifting closer to the safety of his caregiver. It was rare that someone new ever came to hang out with them.

Baekhyun, however, was a completely different story. He launched himself at Kihyun, pulling the boy into a tight embrace. "Hi friend!" he yelled, causing Kihyun to flinch away as he had yelled it directly into his ear.

Baekhyun was 110% more outgoing than Kihyun even on a good day, so it was understandable when Kihyun whined, attempting to push Baekhyun off of him. He had just met this kid for crying out loud!

"Baekhyun! Honey, give your new friend some space, okay? He's shy." Chanyeol said, prying Baekhyun off of Kihyun. "Sorry, hun." Chanyeol smiled apologetically over Baekhyun's head.

Kihyun returned to his place next to Junmyeon, who smiled warmly at him. Chanyeol picked his phone back up and selected a contact, holding the phone up to his ear. Kihyun bounced up and down in his seat. He missed his Daddy.

The phone rang. And rang. And rang. Chanyeol frowned, pulling the phone away from his ear and ending the call. Kihyun whined. "Daddy?" he asked, even though he knew he hadn't answered the phone. 

Why hadn't he answered? Did they not know Kihyun was missing? Did they care? Was Hoseok even looking for him?

Chanyeol sent a reassuring smile, before holding the phone back up to his ear, probably calling again or trying to get in touch with another member.

Kihyun's anxiety was starting to spike. He was in an unfamiliar place, around unfamiliar people. His Daddy wasn't here, and he was usually the one to calm Kihyun down when he got scared. 

Kihyun's lower lip wobbled. He pulled his knees up to his chest and hugged them, trying to give himself a sense of safety. 

"Hey, honey, you okay?" Junmyeon asked. And his soft, kind voice was all it took for the dam to break.

Kihyun started openly crying, "Wan' Daddy," he sobbed. Junmyeon's heart wrenched. Why wasn't anyone looking for this sweet boy?

Junmyeon carefully scooted closer to Kihyun, not wanting to scare him. "Do you want a hug?" he asked. Kihyun nodded, practically sagging against Junmyeon's side. If he closed his eyes and didn't breathe through his nose (Junmyeon wore cologne, Hoseok didn't) he could almost pretend it was Daddy holding him.

"Psst," a finger prodded Kihyun's knee, but he kept his head buried in Junmyeon's side, "psst!" the same voice whispered again, although this time it was louder. 

Kihyun lifted his head to see Baekhyun sitting there, holding out a stuffed animal. "Wanna play?" he asked.

Kihyun nodded, wiping his tears away on his sleeve. Baekhyun was nice. Clingy, but nice.

Baekhyun practically screeched in excitement, gently grabbing Kihyun's hand and leading him to the center of the room, where some other toys were strewn about on the carpet. 

Kihyun clutched the stuffed bunny close to his chest for protection. He noticed the other little, Minseok, was sitting on the floor too, but was on Kyungsoo's lap and he wasn't playing. Instead, he was staring at Kihyun with wide eyes. Kihyun shifted uncomfortably on the carpet.

"Min is uncom'fable with new people," Baekhyun explained, while handing some action figures to Kihyun. 

"No 'm not," Minseok argued, crossing his hands in front of his chest and pouting cutely. Kyungsoo buried his laughter in Minseok's hair. This made Minseok even more aggravated.

"No 'm not!" he argued again, climbing off of Kyungsoo's lap and moving closer to the other two, picking up an action figure with more force than necessary.

Minseok's confidence didn't last very long. When Kihyun let out a giggle at something Baekhyun had done, Minseok's eyes had darted up as if he was just remembering Kihyun was even there. He glanced over his shoulder at Kyungsoo, who had been watching them play the whole time. His lower lip wobbled, reaching his arms out for Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo smiled, moving to sit behind Minseok, who immediately climbed into his lap and relaxed. Tears averted. 

The action made Kihyun think of his own Daddy, his Daddy that wasn't here. Kihyun dropped the action figures he was playing with Baekhyun with, and turned to look at Chanyeol, but he wasn't on the couch anymore. Kihyun's stomach plummeted. Chanyeol was gone, his Daddy was gone, who else was going to leave? Was he going to end up all alone? Did no one want him anymore?

Junmyeon seemed to sense Kihyun's inner turmoil. Before he knew it, Kihyun was pulled into Junmyeon's lap. Junmyeon bounced him softly, leaning in to whisper, "Shhh, honey. It's okay. Chanyeol just left to get your group, he's coming back. And so is your Daddy."

Kihyun relaxed at this. Junmyeon smiled.

The three littles played together on the floor for a few more minutes, before the door to the dressing room opened. 

"Oh, thank God," Kihyun heard a familiar voice whisper from the door. Kihyun twisted around in Junmyeon's hold to face the door, tears coming back full force as he finally saw his Daddy. 

Hoseok looked like he had been crying, and Kihyun just couldn't have that. He launched himself off of Junmyeon and barreled towards Hoseok, arms going around the older's belly. Hoseok hugged him back just as hard.

Kihyun felt something wet his the top of his head, so he pulled away to glance up. Hoseok had started crying. "Daddy why sad?" Kihyun asked, reaching up to wipe the tears away.

Hoseok let out a watery laugh, "These are happy tears, baby. I was so worried, and I'm so glad you're safe. We looked everywhere for you!" 

"Got lost, Yeollie helped me." Kihyun said, "and met Baek and Min, not MinMin though," Kihyun was quick to explain, "and also met Moon." Kihyun said in reference to Junmyeon, who cooed at the nickname. Kihyun leaned up to whisper into Hoseok's ear, "Moon is pretty." 

Hoseok laughed, and so did everyone else in the room. Kihyun was not very good at whispering quietly.

"Okay, baby. Are you ready to go home? You look exhausted." Hoseok said, running a hand through Kihyun's hair. Kihyun just now realized how tired he was.

Kihyun nodded, pulling away from Hoseok. Hoseok watched with wide eyes as Kihyun walked to each of his new friends and said goodbye. Chanyeol had to once again pry Baekhyun off of him. 

Kihyun paused in front of Junmyeon, cheeks red and eyes downcast. Junmyeon smiled, pulling Kihyun in for a hug. Kihyun blushed all the way back to Hoseok.

On the way back to their own dressing room, Kihyun could barely keep his eyes open. Hoseok noticed, stopping their walk and picking Kihyun up. The boy happily obliged, burying his head into Hoseok's neck and falling fast asleep.

\---

When Kihyun woke up, he was in his adult headspace again. He groaned, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. Somehow he had gotten back to the dorm and into his bed. He remembered none of that. 

Next to him on the bed, Hoseok also began to stir. He opened his eyes, smiling up at Kihyun. "Hey."

"Hey," Kihyun answered.

"You feeling okay?" 

"Yeah."

"EXO really liked you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. They texted me like five minutes after we left, asking to have a playdate soon."

Kihyun blushed at the word 'playdate'. Some things he still just couldn't get used to.

"Oh. Okay. That would be...fun."

Their conversation trailed off into comfortable silence, Kihyun sinking back down onto the bed and laying his head on Hoseok's chest.

Hoseok's chest began to rumble with laughter. Kihyun lifted his head to look at him, confused. "What is it?" Kihyun asked.

Hoseok began to laugh harder, and Kihyun sat up completely. "I just, uh," Hoseok cut himself off with his laughter. "I have a question."

Kihyun was beyond confused. "Hoseok, spit it out." 

"What's the deal with you and Junmyeon?" Hoseok asked, attempting to stifle his laughter. Kihyun blushed, eyes wide and mouth hanging open.

"Oh  _shut up._ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Leave any and all requests! *comments help me get motivated to write faster* *hint hint*
> 
> ALSO just to clear some things up - 
> 
> Kihyun doesn't "like like" Junmyeon. He just thinks he is a beautiful specimen (which everyone thinks, lets be honest) and its common for littles to have tiny 'crushes' on people, but PLEASE rest assured that Kihyun loves Hoseok and ONLY Hoseok in the "like like" way.
> 
> Also, I've had a few people comment with questions about Hyungwon, so I would like to address that. Hyungwon was tested when he was younger (like everyone in this story), and is a full-blown neutral. BUT he has certain mixed characteristics. Meaning, while he is still a neutral, he has a less dominant side that is little. Make sense? So in every day life, Hyungwon carries on as a neutral. But if he gets really stressed or upset, he can drop if he wants to.


	14. Kihyun and Punishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kihyun faces his fear of punishment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of people have asked for a chapter focusing on Kihyun and his fear of punishment. This chapter will contain mentions of past abuse (physical, mental, and sexual) so please take caution if you need to.

"Kihyun, can we talk?" 

Hyunwoo had had a lot weighing on his mind recently. Over the past couple of months, Kihyun had finally become comfortable being little around their group. He was able to approach a caregiver for help dropping when he needed it, and that sense of shame and fear he had previously had about being little was pretty much non-existent. When those fears did rear their ugly heads again, Hoseok, or any other member of the group, were able to talk Kihyun down and help him work through his feelings.

Kihyun had made leaps of progress. Instead of being shy, quiet, and reserved when he was little, he was now outgoing and social. He could make new friends, such as the littles from EXO that had come to the dorm for several playdates. He was comfortable asking for and receiving physical contact such as cuddles, and thoroughly enjoyed bath time (usually with Minhyuk because the older insisted Kihyun needed him there to protect him). He still had his bad days, but they were now few and far between. 

But, with Kihyun's new sense of comfortability in his environment and with his caregivers, came the potential for acting out.

Acting out is very common among littles, just as it is with actual children. Sometimes adult stress builds up in such a way that it carries over into an individuals little headspace, and punishment by a caregiver is helpful in settling that stress, or even alleviating guilt. 

Kihyun had never done anything that required punishment. At worst, he would get whiny around bedtime, but he never physically resisted Hoseok's attempts to get him changed into pajamas and tucked into bed. He wouldn't get mouthy like Jooheon or Minhyuk could on the rare occasion (mainly because his little headspace wasn't old enough to speak like that) and he would never get violent with the caregivers. 

But Hyunwoo could sense that something was up. Kihyun, over the past few days, had been somewhat restless in his headspace. He cried a lot, would wriggle out of Hoseok's attempts at cuddling him, and was having trouble eating and sleeping.

Hyunwoo decided to do some research. He looked up information on extremely well behaved littles, and what he found astonished him.

Turns out, being an "extremely well behaved" little, isn't all that good for the little themselves.

They never act out, so they never need a firm hand. They never get the comfort of aftercare after a punishment, they don't learn that respect for their caregivers.

Hyunwoo shuddered at the last comment. He had no doubt in his mind that Kihyun respected them, that wasn't the issue here.

But the first two points? To Hyunwoo, it made sense. Punishment was one of the factors that helped littles to let go of their adult stress. It helped them to put it away and focus on giving in to the care offered to them by their caregivers. In a sense, the adult stress carries over to the little headspace; the incapability of a little headspace to handle adult stress causes them to act out in various ways; which leads to punishment by a caregiver; which helps them to alleviate said stress and focus on just being taken care of.

Kihyun wasn't getting any of that. Hyunwoo knew that being little was definitely benefiting Kihyun, and Kihyun was even able to admit that. But despite all of the progress they had made, dealing with punishment had not been reached yet.

Which was why Hyunwoo was waiting for Kihyun to come out of his little space to talk to him about it. He knew the younger would be uncomfortable, but it had to be done. Hyunwoo would never punish Kihyun when he was little without talking to him about it first, and figuring out what was okay to do and what wasn't. The last thing he wanted to do was cause harm to Kihyun. He wanted their progress to continue, not be destroyed in a matter of moments.

Kihyun was restless again. He had been this way all day; refusing to eat, curling up by himself on the couch, crying even when cuddled. Hyunwoo could tell it was taking a toll on Hoseok.

Hyunwoo motioned to Changkyun to watch Kihyun, who nodded. Changkyun was currently sat on the floor with Jooheon, Minhyuk, and Hyungwon. Hyungwon and Changkyun were playing with the two littles. Hyunwoo heard Hyungwon ask Kihyun if he wanted to come play, but the boy had just whined in response, turning over on the couch.

"Hyung, what's wrong with him?" Hoseok asked desperately, eyes beginning to brim with tears. "He won't eat, he won't sleep, I don't know what to do!"

"Hey, hey, calm down," Hyunwoo said, running his arms up and down Hoseok's shoulders. "I figured it out. I did some research. Here," Hyunwoo said, passing his phone over to Hoseok to read the articles he had pulled up, "These explain it better than I can." 

The two stood in the hallway as Hoseok read through the articles, a cycle of emotions hitting the younger. First, Hoseok's eyes had widened, and he had shaken his head in apprehension, attempting to pass the phone back to Hyunwoo, "No, Hyung, we can't. He hasn't done anything wrong, and you know how scared he is of-"

"I reacted the same way. Finish reading it." Hyunwoo said, pushing the phone back into Hoseok's hands. "Please," he added.

Hoseok gave a last glance of hesitation before going back to reading. Hyunwoo watched as the realization slowly dawned on Hoseok's features. 

"Oh," the younger finally muttered. "This makes sense." 

"I know," Hyunwoo said, running a hand through his hair. "But I have no idea how to approach it. Obviously, we have to wait until he's not little, and talk to him about it then. There's no way I'm doing anything until he can give me his consent." 

Consent is a huge thing in little-caregiver relationships. When a little and a caregiver meet, and the caregiver offers to take care of the little, an agreement is made. The caregiver asks for the consent of the little to give punishment. Even though it is most definitely not a sexual act, to some littles, certain punishments are too extreme. Some are okay with spankings, while some prefer time out's or verbal reprimands. 

Hoseok nodded his head in agreement. "I just, I know he's gonna freak out. He still doesn't like to talk about that stuff, even with me." 

"It takes time," Hyunwoo reassured.

"I know." Hoseok smiled gently.

So the two had walked back into the living room to continue playing with the littles, and continued their efforts in trying to get Kihyun to join. Kihyun had opted to sit in Hoseok's lap, but he still shifted uncomfortably from time to time.

After a few minutes, when the others were all playing and it was just Kihyun and Hoseok sitting on the couch a few feet away from them, Kihyun shifted once more in Hoseok's lap, before muttering, "Daddy," in the most pitiful voice Hoseok had ever heard.

"Yeah, baby?" 

"Don't feel good," Kihyun muttered, voice breaking as he started to cry again. Hyunwoo looked up at him worriedly. 

Hoseok decided enough was enough. "I know, I'm sorry, baby. Come with Daddy, okay?" Hoseok asked, but it wasn't really a question. He stood up, hoisting Kihyun into his arms. Hoseok didn't even have to ask Hyunwoo to follow him.

Hoseok carried Kihyun into their bedroom, and Hyunwoo shut the door behind them. Hoseok turned Kihyun around in his lap so that the boy was facing him.

"Hey, baby." Hoseok tried to smile at the little, but Kihyun was restless, tears still streaming down his cheeks. He sniffled, looking up at Hoseok.

"Hi, Daddy." 

Hoseok's heart fluttered. He knew what he had to do next, Kihyun wasn't going to like. 

"Do you think you can be big for me, sweetheart? Just for a little while?" Hoseok asked. 

Kihyun whined, shaking his head. 

Hyunwoo crouched down behind Kihyun, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. "Come on, Kihyun. You can do it."

It worked like a charm. Kihyun blinked a few times, and his eyes cleared. He reached up a hand to wipe the tears off his face. His eyes widened upon seeing Hoseok's worried face.

"Oh no, what did I do?" Kihyun asked, now noticing the hand on his shoulder, and turning to follow it up to Hyunwoo.

"You didn't do anything, babe." Hoseok reassured.

"Kihyun, can we talk?" Hyunwoo asked, moving to sit on the bed across from the one Hoseok and Kihyun were on.

Kihyun climbed out of Hoseok's lap, moving to sit next to him instead. He looked nervous. "Of course we can. About what?" his voice was shaking.

"You've been restless when you're little. You wouldn't eat, sleep, or let us hold you. You wouldn't stop crying." Hyunwoo said, but he was quick to correct the look of horror that was coming onto Kihyun's face. "We were worried, so I did some research. And I think I know what the problem is."

Kihyun nodded, but didn't say anything. Hyunwoo took this as a sign to continue.

"The research I did tells me that because you're so well behaved, and so scared to act out, your mind is struggling to deal with your adult tension. You keep carrying it back and forth between the two, but you don't ever properly deal with it. The main way to deal with it, is-"

"Punishment." Kihyun utters, eyes downcast on his hands, which were wrung together.

"Yeah." Hyunwoo finishes.

"I know," Kihyun adds. "And I know that's why I've been acting weird. And I can feel it carry over, and I want to get rid of it but I can't bring myself to act out. I-I don't want to..." Kihyun trails off, biting back tears. Hoseok reaches over and laces their hands together. Kihyun squeezes it. "I don't want to disappoint you. And I know that I wouldn't, and I know that punishment is a good thing, but he-he used t-to," Kihyun chokes on his words. Hoseok moves to wrap an arm around him. "He used to use punishment for everything. Literally everything. A-and it was never just a time out, it was always, um," Kihyun chokes again, cheeks burning red in shame. Hoseok tenses. "He'd, you know. And if he wasn't in the mood for that, it was the belt. Or I wouldn't get to eat for a couple of days."

"Jesus," Hyunwoo sighs, running a hand down his face. "I know that this is sensitive. And I want to take every precaution possible to make sure that this isn't going to be detrimental to you in any way when you're little."

Kihyun nods, pulling himself back together. "I know I need it. I can feel that I need it."

"What are you okay with?" Hyunwoo asks. Hoseok can feel the shake in Kihyun's body. He holds him closer.

"N-not spanking. At least not yet. Is that okay?" Kihyun asks. He refuses to make eye contact.

"Of course it is. We would never do anything that you're not okay with." Hyunwoo reassures. Hoseok nods in agreement.

"I think I can handle time outs, just maybe, um, maybe not in the dark?" Hoseok squeezes his eyes shut. No. Absolutely not. What kind of  _monster_ locks a little in a dark room for a time out?

"C-can I be near one of you when it happens? Like, not alone in the room maybe? I just, he used to, used to um, he'd put me in his office, turn off the light, and lock the door and leave me there for hours." 

Hoseok can tell how hard Hyunwoo is trying to keep his composure. "Of course. You would never be alone, and you would never, ever be in the dark. Or locked away somewhere. The door would always be open." Hoseok nodded. That's the way it  _should_ be.

Kihyun takes a shaky breath. "Okay. You have my consent."

\---

It happens the next day. 

The members are sat in the dining room eating lunch. Kihyun is being fed by Hoseok, but is still refusing food.

Kihyun had dropped earlier that morning, and had been grumpy ever since. Hoseok could tell that the breaking point would be coming soon.

Kihyun turned his head away as Hoseok held another forkful of food to his lips. Kihyun was becoming increasingly agitated. Hoseok braced himself. Only a little bit longer.

Kihyun finally snapped. He batted the fork and Hoseok's hand away from his mouth, sending the fork flying across the room and onto the floor, at the same time he yelled, "No!" 

The entire room went quiet. Kihyun looked angry for a few more seconds, before his faced morphed into the complete opposite, and he began sobbing.

Hyunwoo moved from his chair and picked Kihyun up, who was batting his hands against him and trying to escape Hyunwoo's hold. Hyunwoo had no issue with getting Kihyun carried into the living room (he was used to resistance from Minhyuk and Jooheon), where he bounced Kihyun for a few moments, allowing him to release some tension, and to actually _feel_ all of the anger he had been repressing. Kihyun eventually settled down, so Hyunwoo cautiously took the next step. He headed towards the corner, and mentally prepared himself as Kihyun began to struggle against him again.

"Appa, no!" Kihyun whined as Hyunwoo sat him down on the floor, facing the wall. 

"Kihyun," Hyunwoo said. His tone cause the younger to fall silent. "Do you know why you're being punished?" 

Kihyun stilled completely at that word. His eyes widened, and he shrunk away from Hyunwoo in horror. Hyunwoo had prepared himself as best as he could for this moment. This was the one that mattered.

"Kihyun, you know that hitting is not okay. All Hoseok was trying to do was feed you, and you hit his hand and yelled at him. So now, you will sit in this corner for five minutes, and then you will apologize. The lights will be on, and I will be right here on the couch. Face the wall, please." 

The effect was nearly unbelievable. Kihyun visibly relaxed, tension easing out of his body. He turned and faced the wall. He continued crying, but Hyunwoo had read that that was normal. Crying helps to relieve stress. Minhyuk and Jooheon both cry during punishments, and say that it helps them to feel better afterwards.

Hyunwoo waited exactly five minutes. No more, no less. Then he crouched down next to Kihyun. "Okay, baby. Your punishment is over."

Kihyun threw himself at Hyunwoo. The older rocked him back and forth in his lap for several moments. "You did so well, baby. You're such a good boy. Appa is so proud of you."

Hyunwoo continued to repeat those words over and over again, continuing to rock the boy back and forth, running his hands up and down his back, petting his hair. "Such a good boy. You did so well, I'm so proud of you."

Hoseok entered the room shortly after. He looked incredibly tense, and searched Hyunwoo's eyes for answers. The smile that Hyunwoo gave him was enough to reassure him that it had went okay.

Kihyun noticed Hoseok's presence in the room, and turned in Hyunwoo's hold to face him. "I'm sorry, Daddy." he said shyly, eyes on the floor. Hoseok opened his arms to him, and Kihyun climbed over.

Hoseok continued what Hyunwoo started; running his hands up and down Kihyun's back and through his hair, "It's okay, baby, Daddy forgives you. You're such a good boy, Daddy is so proud of you." 

Kihyun melted against his chest, and was quickly fast asleep. Hoseok met Hyunwoo's eyes and both let out a sigh of relief.

\---

The next day, things were back to normal.

Kihyun was nearly bouncing off the walls with energy. Even Minhyuk was having a hard time keeping up with him. 

Kihyun had colored pictures for everyone, and had even tried drawing his own designs. He showed it to Hoseok, and explained what all the blobs were. Hoseok just smiled, and hung Kihyun's picture up on the fridge. Kihyun had beamed.

"Won Won!" Kihyun said, tugging on the end of Hyungwon's shirt. Hyungwon was currently in the kitchen cooking dinner. He was usually the one to take over the cooking duties when Kihyun was little, as he was really the only other member that could cook without burning the dorm down.

"What's up, kiddo?" Hyungwon asked, smiling down at Kihyun.

"What doing?" Kihyun asked, eyeing all of the ingredients and tools laid out on the counter. He reached for a potato, feeling the texture and gazing at it with wide eyes. "What this?" he asked, moving to bring the potato up to his mouth to bite it.

"No, no, no," Hyungwon laughed. reaching out a hand to prevent Kihyun from eating the raw potato. "We have to cook it first, silly! That's a potato."

"Oh," Kihyun said, setting the potato back down. He picked up a green pepper. "What this?" 

"A green pepper,"

"Oh," Silence for a few moments, "What this?" he asked, picking up a tomato.

"That's a tomato."

"Oh," Kihyun moved to the other side of Hyungwon to look at more ingredients. "What this?" he picked up a green onion.

"Green onion." Hyungwon laughed.

"Like green pepper?" Kihyun asked, tilting his head in confusion. 

"Erm, kinda." Hyungwon shrugged, laughing.

Silence for a few more moments. Kihyun eyed the rest of the ingredients.

"Won won?" Kihyun asked. "Is it ready yet?" 

Hyungwon let out another laugh. "Not yet, sweetie."

And so it continued. Kihyun asked Hyungwon what literally every food ingredient, spice, and kitchen appliance in the kitchen was called, and by the time Hyungwon had finally finished dinner, his stomach hurt from laughing so much. Kihyun was literally the cutest thing ever.

After dinner, when everything had finally quieted down, Kihyun curled up on Hoseok's chest in what had become their bed. 

"It worked, Hyung. I feel loads better." 

Hoseok smiled into Kihyun's hair. "I know, baby, I'm so proud of you."

"Love you."

"Love you, too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiiiii sorry for vanishing into thin air for a few weeks. I've been dealing with some mental stuff and had started a new medication so writing was just really not in the books for me these last couple weeks. 
> 
> A couple things : I am running out of request ideas. PLEASE LEAVE REQUESTS!!!
> 
> I plan on writing more of MX and EXO interacting, and am considering writing Kihyun and Hoseok attempting the sexy time (I feel like this kind of goes along with him overcoming his fear of punishment), but I don't know if you guys dig the sexy time or just want to stick to exclusively non-sexual content. I am fine with either! Let me know!


	15. Hyungwon and Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hyungwon slips into little space around EXO. Confusion is present. Explanations are made. Basically just an excuse for me to write more MX and EXO interactions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For your reference once again!!
> 
> I am writing some different members than I did the first time I wrote EXO!
> 
> Chanyeol - caretaker (he is present again because I am trash for him)  
> Junmyeon - caretaker (he is present again because Kihyun is trash for him)  
> Chen - a hecking adorable little  
> Jongin - also a hecking adorable little

It was a Monday when EXO and Monsta X were finally able to get together for a playdate. 

Some of the members schedules happened to sync up, and the two groups agreed that a couple of members getting a free day on the same day was probably as close to all of them hanging out together as they were going to get.

Gathered in the Monsta X dorm were Kihyun, Jooheon, Hoseok, Hyungwon, Chanyeol, Chen, Jongin, and Junmyeon.

It had started off as just all of them hanging out and spending some time together. The two groups had always been close, so finding topics of conversation wasn't difficult.

Jooheon had been feeling little all day, but was nervous about dropping in front of the EXO members for the first time. But that was the whole point of a playdate, wasn't it?

Plus, Changkyun wasn't there. Changkyun was Jooheon's rock.

Jooheon bit his lip and tugged on Hoseok's sleeve. The two were seated next to each other on the couch, with Kihyun on Hoseok's other side, and Hyungwon on the opposite couch. No one had noticed how uncomfortable Hyungwon had become.

"What's up, hun?" Hoseok asked, turning to Jooheon. Jooheon blushed in response.

"Oh yeah, duh!" Chanyeol laughed, pulling open the duffel bag that had been sitting at his feet, "This is supposed to be a playdate and all we've been doing is talking about our companies."

Jooheon's eyes widened as Chanyeol pulled out the contents of the bag - various toy action figures and cars, stuffed animals, coloring books, and puzzles.

Jooheon was a goner.

Chen followed shortly after, and not long after, Jongin climbed down from the couch and began to play with the other two.

Kihyun was still sat on the couch with Hoseok. He had been quiet all night.

"You feeling okay, Kihyun?" Junmyeon asked the other, smile gracing his features.

Kihyun's heart totally did  _not_ flutter and he totally did  _not_ stutter out a lame response of, "Y-yeah, totally fine, hyung" followed by a painful smile.

Don't get him wrong, Kihyun definitely did not have any romantic feelings for Junmyeon. He was just, for lack of better words,  _really fucking pretty._

Plus, he had pretty eyes, as his little self had already embarrassed his big self by pointing out. And a pretty smile. He was just a really pretty man, okay?

Hoseok giggled slightly from his seat beside Kihyun. Kihyun elbowed him.

"Ki'unnie come play!" Jooheon said from the floor, hand reaching out to pull the other towards him. Kihyun blushed, and looked to be about to reject Jooheon's offer, before he spotted Jongin playing with a group of really cute stuffed animals, and then he was gone.

The three boys played together on the floor for a while, the caretakers watching with loving eyes. 

Hyungwon shifted on the couch.

He had been having to pay a painful amount of attention to his headspace throughout the evening. In his defense, he hadn't even wanted to come to the "playdate" in the first place. He just got stuck at the dorm at the wrong time and figured that it would be rude to leave as soon as he found out EXO had arrived at the dorm.

Hyungwon was about to get up off the couch and give an excuse of going to bed early when Hoseok caught his eye. Hyungwon averted his gaze, trying his best to relay with his body language what was going on. He just wanted Hoseok to let him leave the room without asking questions.

Hyungwon was officially out as a neutral. Which meant that he was neither a caregiver, or a little. So if he were to suddenly drop into little space in front of people who weren't his own group, it would cause problems. Raise questions that he wouldn't be able to answer.

Gone were the days that Hyungwon spent cursing and hating himself for having a little side. With the constant love and support from his group, he had learned to embrace the moments when he needed to be little, instead of running away from them. Those moments were few and far between, but having a support system for when he was feeling that way was the best thing in the world.

But in front of anyone other than Changkyun, Jooheon, Hoseok, Hyunwoo, Kihyun, and Minhyuk? No. Absolutely out of the question. It would cause so many problems, they would ask questions, they would think that Hyungwon was a liar - 

"Wonnie, you can drop if you need to, baby." Hoseok said softly. Hyungwon jumped. He hadn't realized that Hoseok had moved from his spot on the other couch in order to crouch in front of the younger. Or that all eyes were currently on him.

Except for the littles, who were still playing on the floor, completely oblivious to the change in the room.

"Wait, what?" Chanyeol asked in a low voice, thinking he had missed something. Had he mis-remembered Hyungwon's status?

Hyungwon flinched at Chanyeol's words because  _shit here it comes they're going to find out, they're going to be mad-_

"Hyungwon, it's okay. No one is upset with you, sweetheart." Hoseok assured, rubbing a hand over Hyungwon's knee.

Suddenly, realization clicked in Junmyeon's head. His eyes widened, because  _no fucking way._

"He drops?" Junmyeon asked in disbelief, which was immediately mistaken as accusatory to Hyungwon, who flinched and pulled his arms tight around his torso.

Hoseok braced himself, "Yes. Is that an issue, hyung?" 

"What? No! Absolutely not, I just thought he was a neutral..." Junmyeon trailed off, hoping that Hoseok would confirm his assumptions.

"He is." Hoseok confirmed.

"I am." Hyungwon bit out defensively.

Chanyeol's eyes widened and he shared a look of disbelief with Junmyeon.

"Holy shit," Junmyeon breathed.

"Care to elaborate?" Hoseok asked, still unsure of the situation.

"We uh, Sehun, he's a neutral, but sometimes he slips. We couldn't find anything online about neutrals having the ability to enter little space." Junmyeon explained.

Hyungwon's eyes widened. "Sehun drops? How often?" 

"Not often, and he's always really embarrassed when it happens. Angry, too. He's felt really alone." Chanyeol fills in, eyes darkening.

"Me too." Hyungwon mumbles. Hoseok grips his hand tighter.

"You two should definitely talk, I think it would be really good for you both." Hoseok said.

"Yeah. I'll be sure to force Sehun to come with us next time. He was scared he would slip in front of you guys. Well, he didn't exactly  _say_ that, but..." Chanyeol trailed off, shrugging. Hoseok got the vague sense that Chanyeol was really concerned for Sehun. Hoseok could relate.

"So basically, long story short," Junmyeon laughed, attempting to lighten the mood, "If you want to drop Hyungwon, there's absolutely no judgement from us."

Hyungwon nodded, staring longingly at the three littles playing on the floor. Hoseok could see it as Hyungwon relaxed, sliding off the couch and onto the floor to begin playing with the others.

Hoseok smiled at the sight. Today had been a good day. He couldn't wait to tell the others what he had found out about Sehun. It meant that Hyungwon didn't have to feel so alone anymore - someone else understood his struggle, and knew exactly what he was going through.

Hmm. Maybe playdates weren't such a bad thing after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is short!! I just wanted to get something out there and set things up for some possible future events. Thank you all so much for all of your kind comments on the last couple chapters. Please leave requests if you have any! 
> 
> Shameless self promo - I just started a new MX hybrid au fic! Check it out if you dig that kind of thing. It's gonna be just as angsty as this work has been lolz
> 
> ALSO I AM SEEING MONSTA X IN CONCERT THIS SUMMER I AM NOT. OKAY.


	16. It's All Fun and Games

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hyunwoo takes Minhyuk to the fair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jesus h christ i didnt realize i was capable of writing fluff with such outrageous sugar content

"Hey Hoseok," Hyunwoo pulls the younger male aside, Hyungwon nodding that he'll keep an eye on the littles that are currently playing in the living room.

Hoseok follows Hyunwoo out of the room and into the kitchen.

"Yeah, hyung?" Hoseok asks, and suddenly Hyunwoo is nervous.

"Would you, um," Hyuwoo clears his throat. "Would you mind keeping an eye on the others this Saturday?" 

Hyunwoo spits it out so fast it sounds like the entire sentence was one word. Hoseok is still very confused.

"Um, of course? It's a day off, where else would I be besides with our little monsters?" 

"Uh, I mean, would you watch Jooheon and Kihyun, Hyungwon if he's little?" 

Hoseok is still very confused. Then it suddenly clicks. Hoseok breaks out in a smug grin.

"You're gonna do something with Minhyuk, aren't you." 

Hoseok wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, and Hyunwoo smacks him.

"N-no! Nothing like that!" Hyunwoo stammers out, although he would be lying if he hadn't thought about doing  _other_ things with Minhyuk. "I just wanna take him on a, a date."

Hyunwoo's cheeks are bright red. Hoseok is living for it. "Aww, hyung! Of course I'll look after the others. Changkyun will be here too, Hyungwon if he's big. Don't worry about it."

Hyunwoo sags in relief. He knew Hoseok would agree, but it still hadn't made asking any easier.

"What'd Minhyuk do when you asked him?" Hoseok grins that stupid grin again.

Hyunwoo's eyes widened, desperate to cover his tracks, "He, uh, he's cool with it."

Hoseok barks out a laugh that Hyunwoo is sure sent Jooheon into a fit of giggles in the living room. "You totally haven't asked Minhyuk yet, have you?"

"Asked me what?" And then of  _course_ Minhyuk decides that is the time to enter the room, all disheveled and cute, rubbing the sleep from his eyes with his sweater paws. He isn't little, though. Hyunwoo can always tell.

"And that's my cue!" Hoseok laughs, ducking out of the kitchen and into the living room.

Hyunwoo could strangle him.

"Hyung?" Minhyuk asks, now standing in front of him and Hyunwoo would really like to know who in God's name decided that giving Minhyuk long, wavy blonde hair could be  _legal-_

"I, um, wanted to ask you something." Hyunwoo blurts eloquently. 

"Yeah, I think we've established that." Minhyuk grins, much to Hyunwoo's dismay. What is it with the  _disrespect_ in this household today?!

"You know how we saw the sign for that fair near the venue on our way in?" 

Minhyuk nods, eyes lighting up. He and Kihyun had flipped out about seeing the sign for a county fair on the way to their venue. They had only seen summer fairs in American movies.

"Do you want to go?" Hyunwoo asks tentatively.

Minhyuk grins ear to ear, and Hyunwoo is confused as to how he ever doubted himself.

"Of course! I'm sure Kihyun will love it, too! And can you imagine Jooheon on rides?" Minhyuk laughs.

Hyunwoo falters. "Um, it would just be us." he blurts without thinking.

Minhyuk's eyes widen. "L-like a date?" 

"Yeah, if you want it to be?" Hyunwoo asks, rubbing the back of his neck.

In response, Minhyuk presses a light kiss to his cheek.

\---

Minhyuk is bouncing up and down in the backseat of their van as Hyunwoo climbs in after him. Their manager had been kind enough to offer to drive them to the fair rather than have the two try their luck with public transportation; what with the mess that had ended with last time.

Hyunwoo eyes Minhyuk fondly as the younger loops his arm through his and stares out the window.

Hyunwoo can tell Minhyuk is trying to stay big. They had already talked about it, and Hyunwoo had constantly reassured Minhyuk that he didn't mind if the younger was little the whole time, that it didn't matter as long as he got to spend time with him. Minhyuk had protested, proclaiming that he would be an adult the entire time to enjoy the date to the fullest.

The notion, although made with good intention, lasted a whole five seconds when they actually got to the fair grounds. 

" _Appa,_ " Minhyuk whispered in awe at the flashing lights and carnival games, hand instinctively intertwining with Hyunwoo's. Hyunwoo reached up to close Minhyuk's mouth that was hanging agape. 

Minhyuk was  _vibrating_ in excitement, and Hyunwoo was in awe of him. How the light hit his features when he looked around with star filled eyes. How even the smallest things made him grin ear-to-ear.

Hyunwoo took them both to purchase a wrist band to ride the rides. They started off with the kiddy rides - the spinning apples, mini ferris wheel, and train. Each of the kid rides was accommodated to fit both actual children, and littles. Hyunwoo had never been more thankful. He had no idea what he would have done if he would have had to say no to the puppy dog eyes Minhyuk shot him when he asked to ride the train. 

After Minhyuk had his fill of the rides he didn't seem scared of (the boy was too stubborn to say he was scared to ride some of the larger rides meant for adults, so Hyunwoo would carefully watch his body language and then gently steer Minhyuk away from them.)

Hyunwoo and Minhyuk held hands as they strolled through the aisles. It was getting darker outside, and Minhyuk seemed enthralled with how the lights of the rides and game booths looked at night.

Minhyuk's eyes widened as they passed one of the game booths. Hyunwoo was surprised none of them had captured his attention already, but once he saw the giant stuffed unicorn plushie, Hyunwoo understood.

Minhyuk tugged on Hyunwoo's jacket sleeve. 

"It's a  _unicorn."_ Minhyuk gasped. 

The two approached the game booth - it was one that you had to aim at the bottles with a plastic gun to shoot them down. Hyunwoo handed a few bills over to the employee, speaking as little English as possible.

The employee handed the toy gun to Minhyuk with a smile. Minhyuk eyed it uncertainly, attempting to pass it over to Hyunwoo. Hyunwoo stopped him, pushing the toy back into Minhyuk's hands. 

Minhyuk beamed, and pointed the gun at a row of bottles. He shot once, twice, three times. He hit once, causing him to jump up and down in excitement and point at the unicorn.

The employee looked like he was going to argue, because there's  _literally no way_ to win one of the biggest prizes by only hitting  _one_ bottle, but Hyunwoo puffed out his chest from where he was standing behind Minhyuk,  _daring_  the employee to deny Minhyuk the unicorn.

The employee pulled the unicorn down from the shelf and handed it over.

Hyunwoo would use his intimidating physical stature any day if it would always earn him the look on Minhyuk's face when he finally held the unicorn in his arms.

The two continued wandering in and out between the aisles, Minhyuk still clutching the unicorn by the leg, dragging it along beside him. Hyunwoo could tell Minhyuk was slowly coming back into his adult space now that the initial adrenaline and excitement had worn off.

"Aw Hyung, I'm sorry..." Minhyuk trailed off.

"Hey, none of that. I told you it was okay. It was fun seeing you so excited." Hyunwoo reassured.

Minhyuk grinned at the ground, moving to drag Hyunwoo towards the food stands. He ordered them an elephant ear to split (which Minhyuk insisted on paying for) and the two found a seat in the grass away from the crowd.

"Oh my  _god,"_ Minhyuk moaned, mouth full of the doughy, sugary goodness. 

Hyunwoo was about to scold Minhyuk for talking with his mouth full because that's just  _gross,_ but Minhyuk shoved a piece of the elephant ear into his mouth and Hyunwoo's eyes widened.

"Oh my  _god,"_ Hyunwoo repeated.

\---

An hour and two more elephant ears later, Minhyuk groaned, stretching his arms above his head and complaining about how horrible he was going to feel later after eating all of that junk.

Hyunwoo laughed, pulling Minhyuk into his side. Blonde hair tickled his chin as Minhyuk sighed, wrapping his arms around Hyunwoo's torso.

"We should probably get going soon..." Hyunwoo began gently. 

"Not before I do something." Minhyuk whispered, not looking at Hyunwoo.

"And what's that?" Hyunwoo asked.

Minhyuk pulled away, positioning himself so that he was sitting between Hyunwoo's legs, their chests pressed together.

"This." 

Minhyuk pressed their lips together. He tasted like cinnamon sugar and heaven, and it ended way too soon.

"Come on," Minhyuk said, jumping up and turning away from Hyunwoo to hide the blush littering his cheeks. "I want to do something else, too."

Before Minhyuk could second guess himself, he was dragging Hyunwoo over to the ferris wheel. He knew it was cliche, but he had secretly always wanted to go on one with someone he loved.

The two climbed in to a seat, and Minhyuk re-claimed his position latched against Hyunwoo's side. He rested his head on his shoulder, the two looking around in awe at the lights, and how small everything looked below them.

Minhyuk leaned over to kiss the side of Hyunwoo's neck; pulling away and sighing in content. 

"Thank you for this, Hyung."

In response, Hyunwoo kissed the top of Minhyuk's head and pulled him closer. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed. :)


	17. Littl(er) Minhyuk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hyunwoo is gone for a few days, and Minhyuk doesn't handle it well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've kinda been gone a while, huh? Life has been crazy. This chapter isn't my best work, but I figured the best way to get out of this horrible writers block I've had is to just jump right back in.

Minhyuk was currently sprawled out on the couch, pouting. It had only been a day since Hyunwoo had left, but everyone in the house was still walking on eggshells. 

Kihyun and Jooheon were both little, playing on the floor of the living room with Jooheon's new toy car track. Kihyun let out a loud giggle as Jooheon gently nudged Kihyun's car off the top of the track and it toppled towards the ground.

Minhyuk flinched, flipping over on the couch to face the cushions, curling into a ball. Minhyuk always felt so  _lost_ whenever Hyunwoo left. Minhyuk knew that it was only for a few days, and that just like always, Hyunwoo would be coming right back. But Hyunwoo hadn't left for more than a few hours since the two had started dating, and Minhyuk supposes that it makes sense that he's taking it harder this time around, but it still  _hurts,_ and Minhyuk had never liked pain of any sort.

Minhyuk huffed, standing up from the couch, determined to not mope around for the next two days. For goodness sake, Hyunwoo was just gone to film a special appearance on an awards show, this wasn't the end of the world!

Hoseok was crouched on the floor now, trying to pull the two littles out of their headspaces as gently as possible. They had dance practice today, and just because Hyunwoo wasn't there to lead them didn't mean they still didn't have work to do. 

The six arrived at the practice studio, and set to work. They ran through a handful of songs, each going great until they got to their new songs.

Minhyuk had been struggling with the 'Shoot Out' choreography ever since they had started to learn it. Hyunwoo had stayed after practice with Minhyuk the last several days to help him get it down, but Minhyuk had been so subconsciously distracted due to the knowledge that Hyunwoo was going to be leaving soon that he hadn't been all  _that_ focused.

They got to about the middle of the song before Minhyuk stumbled for the first time. His face went red as he desperately tried to remember where he was supposed to move to - 

"Minhyuk!" their dance instructor sighed, pausing the music. "I thought Hyunwoo was working with you on this?" 

A blast of insecurity and embarrassment hit Minhyuk like a freight train. He sniffled, looking down at his feet indignantly. Da-Hyunwoo always says that _if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all._

The instructor kept questioning Minhyuk, and reminding the others of how important it was for them to speed up their learning process. Minhyuk was still looking down, physically biting his tongue to keep it inside of his mouth instead of sticking it out at their instructor like he so desperately wanted to.

"Hyung? Are you okay?" Changkyun asked, laying a gentle hand on Minhyuk's arm. Minhyuk shrugged off the hand, mumbling angrily under his breath about their instructor being a big stupid meanie head.

Minhyuk hadn't realized he hadn't mumbled at all, and from the positively scandalized expression on their instructors face, followed by an apologetic look from Hoseok, it was clear that everyone in the room had heard.

"Okay, you know what, why don't we cut it short for today. Hyunwoo isn't here, and not much is getting done anyways..." a sharp glare from Minhyuk cut him off further. "Anyways, I'll see you guys later." 

From his spot in the corner of the room, Minhyuk kicked his foot absently, scuffling it along the floor. As the others began packing up their belongings, Minhyuk watched as Changkyun began to pack up for Minhyuk.

"Changkyun, it's okay, don't bother. I'm staying anyways." Changkyun looked like he wanted to argue, but Minhyuk wasn't having it. "He's right, I should have this choreography down already. All of you already do." 

"Min, you're on the brink of dropping, just come back home with us?" Hoseok asked gently, fully aware that if he didn't pose his thoughts as a question, Minhyuk would feel corned and that boy was  _nothing_ if not stubborn.

"I am  _not._ " Minhyuk huffed, crossing his arms in front of this chest, refusing to see reason. Across the room, Jooheon snickered at how  _adorable_ angry Minhyuk looked. "Look, I'm just going to run through the choreography a few more times, no big deal. I'll come back when I'm ready."

Hoseok rolled his eyes, desperately wishing that Hyunwoo were here. He'd be able to send Minhyuk a warning look that would have the boy listening immediately.

Hyungwon, rolling his eyes with an exasperated sigh, blurted (without much thought, as the poor kid was exhausted and had been up nearly all night), "Min, quit being a baby about it, let's just go home."

This, coincidentally, turned out to be the literal  _worst_ thing Hyungwon could have said at that moment, as Minhyuk spun around from where he was setting up their sound system to play their newest songs on a loop and sent the taller a bone chilling, icy glare.

Hyungwon, too tired to see how tense the situation had become, opted to continue voicing his thoughts. "You're too far gone to see how childish you're acting right now."

If any of them would have blinked, they would have seen the look of hurt that crossed Minhyuk's face before it morphed into one of heavier anger than before. "Oh yeah? At least I've got an excuse to act like a baby."

Hyungwon flinched back violently, as though he had been physically hit. Hoseok, who had frequently had a front row seat to Hyungwon's episodes of self doubt about being a neutral who could fall into little space, was quick to step in. 

" _Lee Minhyuk,_ what the fuck?!" he shouted. And of course they weren't handling this well. Of  _course_ Hyunwoo had to leave at such a bad time, of course they all had to be just that  _right amount_ of sleep deprived, hungry, and exhausted all at once. 

Minhyuk refused to back down, because goddamnit, he was  _not_ a coward, and he most  _definitely_ did not feel bad about hurting his friends feelings by saying something so hurtful. 

Instead, he opted to turn the music up full blast, turning his back to the others as they filed out of the practice room, leaving Minhyuk all alone. 

\---

Minhyuk spent three hours going over the same choreography until he was absolutely, 100% certain that he had it nailed down. He was exhausted, opting to run through it at least two or so more times, just to be absolutely certain that he would have something to show for all of his hard work tonight, at practice tomorrow. 

Minhyuk made the mistake of letting his mind wander as he ran through the choreography one last time. He remembered the look of hurt on Hyungwon's face, how shitty he's felt since he woke up this morning and realized Hyunwoo still wasn't home, how much he  _missed_ Hyunwoo - 

_Snap_

The pain didn't hit Minhyuk until he was on the floor. Confused, he attempted to stand up, succeeding until he had to put weight on his knee. A pained scream ripped itself out of his throat as he crumpled back to the ground. 

Minhyuk pulled his leg up close to his body, tears rolling down his face before he even registered them. Angrily, he wiped them away. 

 _Fuck._ He's just so stupid, so weak, so pathetic, so  _childish, such a **baby.**_

Minhyuk attempted to pull himself up again, just in order to reach his phone on the other side of the practice room. He'd have to call someone, anyone, to help him get back to the dorm.

He reached his phone, and had just enough time to see a flash of his lock screen picture of him and Hyunwoo before his phone died.

Minhyuk bit his lip, partly due to the pain, partly due to seeing a glimpse of Hyunwoo. Mostly due to now having no way to communicate to the rest of his group that he needed help walking home.

Minhyuk huffed for the millionth time that day, kicking his feet against the floor in a moment of childish frustration. This only led to him crying out a whiny "Ow!" when he jostled his knee. 

Tears sprung to Minhyuk's eyes as he realized the reality of the situation he was in. He was all alone, he was hurt, and as far as he knew, none of the other members would be coming to collect him soon because he'd been such a  _dick_ earlier.

Minhyuk sniffled, mumbling to himself. "Okay, it's okay, I can be big right now, I can get home -" he was in the process of hoisting himself up against the wall, keeping all of his weight on his good knee when it happened.

The lights in the practice room went off.

Minhyuk flinched, squeezing his eyes closed. He waved his free hand around, attempting to trip the motion sensor to turn the lights back on. He opened his eyes again, and panic began to seep in as the room continued to be dark. Minhyuk felt his throat begin to close up, body screaming in protest as he continued to panic.

Minhyuk  _hated_ the dark. As much as he would insist that the fear was limited to his little side, everyone in the group knew that it wasn't. Hyunwoo and Hoseok would always leave a nightlight on in Minhyuk's room, regardless of whether the boy was little or not.

Despite his best efforts, Minhyuk was losing the battle of trying to stay big. He was tired, scared, hurt, and he felt so  _guilty_ about the way he'd been treating his friends lately. 

Defeated, Minhyuk sunk back to the floor, tears rolling freely, choked sobs becoming louder, filling up the empty room.

Minhyuk didn't even know where he was anymore. He was the littlest he had ever been, the most  _vulnerable_ he had ever been while in headspace.

Across the room, something rustled in a dark corner. Minhyuk whimpered, as he was currently too small to make verbal sentences to cry out for help. 

Eventually, after sitting in the dark room for what felt like an eternity, Minhyuk became aware of another area of his body causing him pain. 

He had been well hydrated during dance practice, and hadn't gone to the bathroom since late afternoon... 

Minhyuk cried harder as he wet himself for the first time in little space.

\---

He must have fallen asleep at some point. 

Minhyuk awoke what felt like ages later, sunlight streaming in through the windows of the practice room, finally allowing some light. Minhyuk blinked, sitting up in confusion. Confusion quickly morphed to horror, then to embarrassment, as he recalled the happenings of the night previous.

Minhyuk stood, wincing in pain at the discomfort (and rash, most likely) that had formed on his upper legs and thighs. He spun around, ignoring the sharp pain in his knee, rushing across the room to collect paper towels and cleaner from the janitors closet. He cleaned up his mess, red faced and all, and disposed of the evidence. He grabbed a winter coat that, luckily, one of them had left in the practice room at some point and thew it on over his soiled clothes. He did a once over in the mirror, wincing at how terrible he looked.

Walking the short distance back to their dorm was  _excruciating._

Minhyuk's knee hurt, his thighs burned, his head was pounding. He blinked back tears as he unlocked the door to their dorm. He shot past Kihyun and Hoseok, who were in the kitchen, without as much as a second glance. He missed the concerned looks they both sent him. Minhyuk could hear Jooheon and Changkyun in the living room, which only left Hyungwon unaccounted for. 

Minhyuk darted for the bathroom, desperate to shower and get out of his soiled clothes. He figured Hyungwon was probably still sleeping, but of course the universe would continue to be against him.

Just as Minhyuk reached the bathroom, Hyungwon stepped out, the two colliding with each other. Hyungwon's eyes widened in alarm, but Minhyuk refused to look at him, trying his hardest to just get to the damn shower - 

"Minhyuk, wait, can we talk please?" Hyungwon asked, voice soft. 

"Not right now, okay?" Minhyuk hadn't intended to snap, hadn't meant to make things worse, but apparently that was all he was good at lately. 

Hyungwon's arms blocked Minhyuk's entry to the bathroom, and it was clear he wasn't going to take no for an answer. Minhyuk felt trapped, and incredibly irritated at Hyungwon's actions. 

Minhyuk finally looked up to meet Hyungwon's eyes, but panicked once again as he saw that the others nose was crinkled in disgust. 

"What is that  _smell?_ " Hyungwon blurted without thinking.

Minhyuk did the only rational thing he could think of - he  _shoved_ Hyungwon out of the way, the other practically slamming against the wall of the hallway out of shock. Minhyuk slammed and locked the door of the bathroom behind him, finally  _alone._

By the time Hyungwon was finally able to place the smell, Minhyuk was already in the shower.

\---

Minhyuk continued crying as he cleaned himself up. Everything hurt. He had pushed himself too hard at practice and his muscles ached, his knee was swollen, there was a horrible rash between his legs, and his neck hurt from sleeping on the floor. 

He carefully stepped out of the shower and dried himself off, patting himself dry like their caregivers do when the littles get baths.

Looking around the room, Minhyuk thanked the heavens that a pair of sweatpants (Kihyun's, from the look of them) had been left in the bathroom, as well as one of Hyunwoo's hoodies. Minhyuk pulled both articles of clothing on, wincing as the material rubbed the sore places on his body.

He washed his face, attempting to get rid of the dark circles and puffy eyes staring back at him in the mirror.

He gathered his soiled clothes, hoping to make it to the washer before anyone else could get in his way. Bracing himself, he opened the bathroom door.

He managed to get to the washing machine, opening the lid and dumping his clothes inside. He poured a ridiculous amount of detergent and softener over top, and closed the lid, thanking the heavens that no one else had to witness - 

"Hyung?" 

Minhyuk shouldn't even be surprised at this point, really.

"Yeah?" he answered, fumbling with the knobs of the washing machine, attempting to get it to start.

"Do you need help?" 

"No! I'm fine, everything is fine, Jooheon." 

"Um, you should probably use the other detergent, too." Jooheon attempted to add gently.

"What?" Minhyuk asked, finally spinning around to face the younger. Jooheon shifted nervously.

"The, um, stronger detergent." in response to the continued look of confusion from Minhyuk, Jooheon added, "Hyungwon said you had an accident." 

Minhyuk paled, ready to burst into tears again. "I-I didn't, I didn't! I just spilled coffee, that's it, okay?!" 

Jooheon backed up, and Minhyuk instantly felt guilty. He didn't have time to dwell on it, as they were soon all ushered out of the dorm by Hoseok. They had interviews to do today, and Hyunwoo would be arriving back at the dorm tonight.

\---

Everything was tense during the interviews. Minhyuk hardly said a word, laughing when the others did, answering questions when they were directed at him personally.

Minhyuk didn't feel good. He'd forced himself out of the youngest headspace he'd ever been in out of sheer embarrassment. He couldn't help but to feel bitter about it. The one time he'd been  _that_ vulnerable, no one had wanted to take care of him. He'd been left alone, in the dark.

It took all Minhyuk had to keep from bursting into tears during the interview. He was so hurt, his body was still in so much pain. The interviewer seemed to pick up on this and cut their talk short, ushering them behind the prying eyes of the camera crew and into a calmer dressing room.

Minhyuk was too out of it to hear Hoseok thanking the kind interviewer, or to notice Changkyun leading him to the couch, crouching down in front of him.

Minhyuk didn't really know where his head was at. Or where he was, or what was happening. It sounded like someone was talking to him, shaking him to get his attention.

Minhyuk felt himself getting hoisted up into someones arms. The embrace made him feel warm, comfortable. Minhyuk vaguely remembers bringing his thumb up to his mouth, and turning his face into Hoseok's neck and inhaling his scent before falling fast asleep.

If Minhyuk were in his usual headspace, he would have refused to be carried, refused to be babied, and  _definitely_ would have refused to suck his thumb. Everyone in the room was painfully aware of this fact. Changkyun shared a look with Hoseok. 

"I think its time to call Hyunwoo."

\---

When Minhyuk woke up, he was curled up on his own bed. He sat up, stretching. He crinkled his nose in disgust as he wiped the saliva off of his wrinkled thumb. Lee Minhyuk does  _not_ suck his thumb.

He could tell something was off as he entered the kitchen, yawning as he began to pour himself a bowl of cereal. 

"Hyung?" It was Jooheon's soft, caring tone that brought everything crashing down again. Minhyuk's bowl of cereal hit the counter with the  _thud_ , milk splashing over the sides. 

How had Minhyuk forgotten?! How had he just waltzed out of his bedroom like nothing was wrong?!

"Hyung, can we talk?" Jooheon asked again, voice still soft. 

"Uh, nah, everything's okay, I, uh." Minhyuk laughed nervously, "You want some cereal?" Minhyuk picked up the bowl, thrusting it into Jooheon's hands as he made his way to the living room where he instinctively knew the others would be. He started talking before he rounded the corner, keeping his eyes downcast on the carpet as he continued talking.

"Hyungwon, I owe you an apology, the shit I said last night was insensitive and cruel, and I'm really sorry. Hoseok, I'm sorry for snapping at you yesterday, it was uncalled for. You guys were just trying to help. And I know you're gonna ask about what happened but I don't really know how to explain it and I really don't wanna talk about it anyways."

Minhyuk kept his gaze downcast until he felt Hyungwon's arms wrapping around him. "I'm sorry too." 

The two pull away, Minhyuk hesitantly meeting the gaze of the others in the room. 

"Hey, baby." Minhyuk stilled, eyes widening and filling with tears before he even had time to acknowledge that Hyunwoo was home.

Minhyuk sniffled as the older wrapped his arms around him. The smell of Hyunwoo making him fell calm, safe, and loved.

"Lets go talk, baby."

\---

"Yeah, I'm almost back at the dorm actually, why, whats up?" Hyunwoo asked quizzically. 

He had just received a phone call from their groups youngest, Changkyun, asking when he was going to be home.

"Well, uh, it's Minhyuk."

Hyunwoo sucked in a breath, quickening his pace. "I'll be there in 5."

\---

Hyunwoo was _livid._

"Let me make sure I have this straight." Hyunwoo began, pacing the dorm with the most anger that any of the members had ever seen him exhibit, "You all went to practice, you all could tell that Minhyuk was feeling little but you still pushed him, and Hyungwon, you called him a  _baby?!_ " Hyunwoo scoffed, cutting off any protests that were arising, "and then, when Minhyuk got upset that all of you were ganging up on him and snapped back, you all left him alone in the practice room until the  _next day_." 

None of the others, especially Hoseok and Changkyun, could meet Hyunwoo's eyes. "Guys, I thought we had all of this figured out. After what happened with Jooheon, I thought we all realized how important it is to take care of our littles.  _All of them."_

Hyunwoo turned towards Changkyun, the member he was currently least upset with, steeling himself. "You said he had an accident? And regressed to a younger age than normal earlier?" Changkyun nodded, and Hyunwoo continued his scolding. "You all realize how abnormal that is for Minhyuk, do you not? He has  _never_ regressed to a non-verbal age, and had absolutely  _never_ wet himself while little. Can you imagine how terrifying that had to be for him? To go through that all alone?" 

Hyunwoo stopped himself, running a hand through his hair. He knew he wasn't doing any good by continuing to scold the members and make them feel bad, but he was so  _angry_ and  _scared._ So many horrible things could have happened due to the caregiver negligence, but whats done is done.

"Alright, I'm done. All of you need to apologize to him and if we're lucky, everything will be fine." 

Hyunwoo sagged into the couch in defeat for a few minutes, no one else in the room knowing quite what to do either.

A crash from the kitchen startled them each, Hyunwoo's eyes widening as he heard Minhyuk's voice, and even more so as he watched Minhyuk enter the living room, eyes downcast. 

"Hyungwon, I owe you an apology, the shit I said last night was insensitive and cruel, and I'm really sorry. Hoseok, I'm sorry for snapping at you yesterday, it was uncalled for. You guys were just trying to help. And I know you're gonna ask about what happened but I don't really know how to explain it and I really don't wanna talk about it anyways."

Hyunwoo watched as the other members in the room looked up in shock. Minhyuk was rarely the first one to apologize, the boy was stubborn as a mule. Hyungwon crossed the room quickly, wrapping his arms around Minhyuk, "I'm sorry too." 

The two pull away, Minhyuk hesitantly meeting the gaze of the others in the room. 

"Hey, baby." Hyunwoo said, quickly standing and wrapping his arms around the younger. 

Hyunwoo felt Minhyuk's sharp intake of breath, before he sagged against Hyunwoo in content. 

Hyunwoo was never leaving again.

"Lets go talk, baby." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like you all should know that this was written over the span of literally an entire month. It's jumpy, awkward in places, and definitely not my best work. I've not been in a great place lately, but missed writing so much that I still tried. Thanks, as always, for reading. :)


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